Why is it that people look down upon stay-at-home mothers?

Question

It has been my experience that if you are a housewife, you are considered stupid, lazy, and inferior to those who are so-called career women. I've even had women make remarks to me like "Oh, you just stay at home", or "How can you do that". People don't realize that housewives/mothers don't have it all that great, they never get holidays, don't get paid, their work-day is never done, have no financial security for the future, etc. I think people still have the misconception that housewives lay around on the couch all day and eat bonbons and watch trash TV. That makes me mad!!!

Answer 1

Whew! How stupid these people seem to be. They just don't know that stay-at-home mothers are doing a very noble job . If all fathers are considered the pillars in the family...we stay-at-home mothers are the "guiding light" in the family. If these career women are more concern in making money...stay-at-home mothers are more concern in building up a good family life for her husband and kids. Kids nurtured by them are more successful in life,,,they get all the attention and love they deserve from a mother. They are properly guided and are more emotionally and intellectually secured. So...be proud...of what you are...because the best citizens in this world are being molded by stay-at-home mothers just like me and you. Smile))))

Answer 2

I am a SAHM of 2 and have often heard this.In fact I have posted question on hear about Wanting to scream I do have a real job!While I have the utmost respect for working moms I do get tired of being stereo typed. While we do not "work" or bring in an income we do have a job and We should get some respect for what we do. It is also often a misconception that we stay home because our husbands make SOOO much money that we can afford it.Well I am here to say that is not always the case.For me I stay home because I cannot afford what they want for daycare in our city so I would be essentially working to pay for other people to look after my children. This does not make much sense to me. And for all those who say I could just let family do it or work when my husband is home, My family is far away,and my husband works the kind of hours that would mean I would have to work all night. So to all those that judge us Things are not as they always seem

Answer 3

I think it's great that you can be home with your children! If it is financially possibly, I plan to do the same. I think being there with your children is the only way you can make sure your children are raised properly. Leaving your kids with babysitters-in some cases, nearly perfect strangers-means that you risk leaving your children in the hands of people who do not have the same values and moral standards as you do. In my family we had more than 30 au pairs and babysitters over a period of twenty years and while some of them were very nice, the majority were not great. Because of my personal experience, I've decided that if I can't personally take care of my children, I would only leave them with a family member (my mother, my husband's mother, etc). You can never be 100% sure that something bad will happen, no matter who you leave them with, but I believe that it's a whole lot less risky to leave your children in the hands of someone you know and trust. Good for you for taking your childrens' education in hand! Being a parent is a hard job and a lot of people don't fully appreciate or realize the effort it takes.

Answer 4

I think that being a parent is the hardest job anyone can have. I am a mother of three who has been on both sides (stay at home mom until they went to school then went to work outside the home). I don't think you are lazy or stupid, I think you are lucky. I would have loved to stay home with my children longer, but it wasn't possible. Don't let anyone make you feel inferior, people who make those comments either don't know how hard it is to be a stay at home mom or they are jealous that they are not able to do so themselves. Be proud of what you do and keep up the good work.

Answer 5

Just ignore them. Sometimes people are the rudest when they are jealous. I've heard so many times from career women that they'd love to stay home, but can't afford to. Or their marriage went sour and they don't have a choice in the matter of working or not. Be proud that your family finances are balanced well enough for only 1 paycheck to handle the bills. Be happy that your kids aren't raised by strangers. Get excited that you don't have to juggle your work and your husband's just to get a week off for vacation. And smile over the fact that you get to see your kids all day long, instead of a few short hours at night when you have to do a full housecleaning and destress from a "job". I don't care if working moms try to make me feel inferior, I know my job is important. My 3 children's faces tell me so everyday.

Answer 6

I don't look down on stay at home moms. I am a stay at home mom and wife. Yes it is the hardest job in the world to take care of kids, keep house, cook and all the other endless things we have to do for everyone in the house everyday.
I don't lay on the couch watching tv or whatever. I am up and going until way after my son is asleep.
That is true we never get a break or a paycheck for doing all of this but even though we chose to stay at home does not mean we are lazy or whatever anyone wants to call it.

I could not even imagine working and putting my kid in daycare and have to worry all day if he is getting treated right.

I know of women that do work just to get away from their kids so i don't think that is right.

I don't care what anyone says "I am proud to be a stay-at-home mom and wife"!!!!!!!

Answer 7

The only time I look down at stay at home moms is when they look down at/mock working moms. My 3 aunts are all stay at home moms, and they would attack my mom on why she couldn't be at such and such place for me, or take me here or there...

A misconception of the opposite is, my mother, who works, also doesn't get paid when she has to push all of her mom duties into the hours she has off. She doesn't get holiday from being a mom either.
Both are choices, and you should be content at what you do, but the "I'm a housewife and this is how busy I am," always angers me a bit, because it undermines what working wives have to do. They have to do all the busy stuff AND work, and sometimes, it's not their choices (ie, the family doesn't have enough money for the mom NOT to work, even if she wanted to.)

Remember, don't look down on anyone, especially if you don't want people to look down at you.

Answer 8

Well, I think others should be happy as you helping the unemployment by not taking up a job that someone else needs. What I don't understand is when people (kinda off subject -not talking about only Moms now) win the lottery they want to show what great work ethic they have & keep working. Instead they could do volunteer work so that someone looking for a job to get off unemployment, etc. can have more opportunities. (JMHO) Plus, if you work you'd have to pay someone else to do the job you are doing now. (So you are doing a pay-type of job.) Why? Why have to let someone else watch your kids when you are able? Or pay someone to clean your house, or buy more take-out, etc, cuz Mom's these days that have to work out of the house have their hands too full & I feel for them. But they do a really great job juggling both - SuperMoms! :)))! My sister & cousin are career women & wonderful Moms! Busy, busy, busy!

Answer 9

I think this is a big misconception that most people have about stay at home moms. The only time I get to sit down is when I am reading my children a story. It stems from jealousy of insecure working mothers that have no other options but to work. I am not saying all working mothers are like this but it is obvious that there are ignorant women out there who make themselves feel better by bashing stay at home mothers. Just be thank full that you have class when it is obvious that they don't. I have a neighbor with a master's degree in early childhood education. She is a stay at home mom because that is what she wants to do. Her 2 year old son is brilliant. They have to budget their money so she can stay at home but they aren't struggling. Most stay at mothers stay at home because they want to, not because they have no other options.

It just proves that ignorance is bliss and these tack less working mothers must be extremely happy.

Answer 10

I read an article a few years back (tried to find it just now, but couldn't) and it said that, with all the hard work, errands, help with kids, etc. that stay-at-home mothers do, they should earn more than $200,000/year! I agreed with that completely. You work 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and the amount that some people pay their maids, etc. would add up quickly.
My advice is to do what YOU want and ignore everyone else!