She wants to come over tomarrow and drop off something important. I am pretty sure its a lare sum of money. The thing is , my husband and I appriciate the thought but dont want it ! it makes us feel very small and our pride shut down. They already help pay half our rent. Thats a different story. Anyway, I plan on saying it very nicely and appriciative to turn it down. We can manage like we have been by struggling by. We have a roof over our head, food in our stomachs, bills our late but do get paid, what else? We are fine and I really dont want the money. Can anyone out there relate to what we are going through? Times are hard now, but will get better in the future. we are 31 and have a 2 year old.
2006-12-05 17:32:18 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
we already had to borrow $ 250 for our brakes. We plan on paying back, I know she wont accept it but tuff, I will pay it back!!
2006-12-05 17:39:42 · update #1
I did not know my husband asked her for it, I would have gotton a loan from the bank, so I am upset at him for that!
2006-12-05 17:41:43 · update #2
Tell her she can come on over and be my mother=in-law, She sounds like a jewel keep her and accept she feels blessed by giving
2006-12-05 17:36:08 · answer #1 · answered by devora k 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't look a gift hoarse in the face. Charity and benevolence are a huge part of making it work when times are tough.
Consider this... If she tends to be a giving individual and not controlling, then likely her wisdom is that you need the break.
If she tends to be controlling of others in the past, make sure there is clear understanding of her motivations and the terms associated with her proposed good will and understand very well if you're expected to pay it back, how and when.
Be thankful in either case. Remember that being willing and able to accept a gift, is some times more important than being able to offer one.
2006-12-06 01:50:44 · answer #2 · answered by mikesalloverthat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can accept it as a gift or not. If she wants something in return I say refuse. If it is a gift and she will never bring it up again just swallow your pride and accept it. You can always set it aside in an account for your daughter or better yet have her invest the money into a CD bank account for the future of your daughter. Your Mother-in Law will enjoy giving but then you won't feel like you are taking advantage.
2006-12-06 13:06:04 · answer #3 · answered by Sassy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate.
Tell your HUSBAND, not her that your money affairs need to stay between you.
If you need to borrow the money, and she can afford to lend it to you then there is nothing wrong with that. If the bills are late then it sounds like you don't need the interest charges the bank would give.
Work hard, save some money and when you are in a better financial situation, buy her a big gift and thank her for being there for you when you needed it.
If you work at it you won't always need it.
2006-12-06 01:55:54 · answer #4 · answered by jrnwy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one is forcing you to accept money from her and also you should pay your own rent. I am not trying to be rude or anything but you are giving others space to control your life. And you should pay your own way especially if a child is involved. My husband and I believe firmly in handling our money and personal affairs by ourself and doing so gives you control. If they are paying half the rent and also trying to give money to you then there is something behind it and you should do what it takes to get out of that situation as it is bound to backfire on you. Get a second job if need be.
2006-12-06 01:39:40 · answer #5 · answered by Mom_of_two 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Give her a huge hug.Tell her you are very thankful,but you can't except it.Not every mother in law does that.Just for that she deserves the hug.Tell her how it makes you feel and less she helps,quickly you'll get on your feet.Promise her if you really need it,you'll ask her for it,but right now you are doing OK.God bless you.You are very honest person.Any other person would just take the free money and spend it.Good luck to you.
2006-12-06 01:50:49 · answer #6 · answered by avavu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I know alot of people that would love to have her as a mother - in - law.
But i feel she feels that if she don't do it than it won't be done. So try to do things on you own. Don't let thing get in in your way. Let the pay back go for now, get on your feet, thats what she wants you to do first. Then you can pay her back later.
2006-12-06 01:55:00 · answer #7 · answered by SYDORAS 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
everyone needs help some time . thank her for helping . if she didn't care . she would not offer
2006-12-06 02:03:03 · answer #8 · answered by single-rose@sbcglobal.net 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
idk, thats a good question
2006-12-06 02:27:38 · answer #9 · answered by Ricardo Quaresma 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋