well i have a bf and we been together for 3 yrs and everytime i tell him if he doesnt stop doing the things he does we might as well break up. he says ok. then he leaves. about 3 weeks later he calls back talking about he loves me and wants it to work. then the cycle starts all over again. why does he keep coming back if he knows what i expect. and why does he agree to leave each time. would you date someone who is willing to walk out if you put down your foot. he never says stuff like baby please dont leave me or even trys to stay but once hes gone here he comes back again. i need to get some self esteem to make this stop cuz i have none. any advice is needed cuz im tired and depressed and no self esteem to walk out of this. its killing me slowly. and he knows it too.
2006-12-05 15:52:49 · 9 answers · asked by eaglestraces123 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Putting your foot down would not letting him back in! He's is taking your for a fool! what an insult! you are not another dumb woman that lets a man treat her like a piece of dog crap! please dont let him think women are crap - do us all a favour and dump him! he is taking you for granted! what ever happens -you will learn from this and are smart enough to see the vicious cycle so jump off the merry-go-round before it self -distructs! Get out and meet new people! go for a coffee with your friends, go to the gym , do salsa classes! there are many avenues to gain happiness and it does not belong to him!
2006-12-05 16:03:25 · answer #1 · answered by Change is gonna come 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One weekend when he is gone:
Change your answering machine message to say you are out and won' be back till later in the day.
Don't answer the phone. Let it go to message.
Change the locks to the house you are in. In case he shows up uninvited with a key.
Pack up your things ASAP. Pack the moving truck in one day.
Leave.
Move to another state. At least five hours drive away.
Change the phone number. Make it unlisted. Don't give it out.
Get connected to a church or to a therapist or both.
Cut all ties with this guy and his friends and family. You don't need this- you need time to work on yourself. Without him.
You allready know this - now I am telling you to do it.
Call a women's shelter if you have to get some immediate support, but just do it.
2006-12-06 00:02:30 · answer #2 · answered by tankgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it seems to me that he is leaving because you're telling him to break up as if you think you're not good enough for him.. stop telling him to break up with you.. he feels as if he has no other choice but to agree with you.. or maybe he says yes cause he's frustrated you put him on the spot like that.. maybe he doesn't know what you are expecting Hun.. i mean guys are slow ..lol.. you just got to let him know what you want.. and ask him if he understands what you're telling him... i really hope this helps.. and good luck
2006-12-06 00:03:23 · answer #3 · answered by coqueta19 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are a fool. He is playing you. You need to drop the zero.
The cycle will have to be cut at some time. He has a safety level with you and you always let him back.
Dump now, get someone else.
2006-12-05 23:56:07 · answer #4 · answered by javarick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl you need to move on and realize that you're too good for him .. because he keeps leaving u and its making u sad..and thats not a healthy relationship .. just move on tell him goodbye one more time and in those 3 weeks he decides to ignore u just look for other ppl spend time wit ur friends cuz they could help and also jus beauty urself like do ur hair go shoppin and get ur self steem bak and then when he comes bak in 3 weeks itll be easier for u to say no becuase u have confidence! so look up for how to get ur confidence back google it.!
2006-12-06 00:02:23 · answer #5 · answered by ayounglady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the guy has a brain which u have displayed and he probably does because you do like him someway then just sit down and ***** talk . Have u ever had the courage to talk about how u really feel?
2006-12-06 01:53:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
because you let him, everytime you take him back it means that you are ok the things he did. tell him and mean it that if he leaves again there is no comming back, and you need to mean it and if he leaves, which he will, then you move on, find someone better, older who will understand you and treat you better...
2006-12-06 00:02:23 · answer #7 · answered by wizzard 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU ANSWER YOUR OWN QUESTION. HE DOES THIS BECAUSE HE KNOW THAT YOU WILL STAY AROUND AND
HE CAN DO AND SAY WHAT HE WANT. TIME TO GET OFF
THE ROLLER COASTER RIDE. YOU ARE BETTER THEN
HE THINK TIME TO LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU WILL NOT
PUT UP WITH THE DISRESPECT ANY MORE, YOU NEED
TO KNOW THAT YOU AR WORTH IT AND IF HE CANT
RESPECT YOU TIME TO LET HIM GO. YOU NEED TO LOVE
SELF BEFORE YOU CAN LOVE ANYONE AND AS LONG
AS YOU PUT UP WITH THIS IT WILL CONTINUE.
2006-12-05 23:59:35 · answer #8 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has 'comfortable old shoe' syndrome. You are the shoe. Use the shoe and kick his a*s to the curb.
2006-12-05 23:57:31 · answer #9 · answered by moobiemuffin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋