My boyfriend of two years took me out of my mothers house, where i was fine, moved me to a strange town. Im 27 hes 36 so it wasnt a silly teenage fling. We had a child together. We made promises and commitments to eachother. I felt true love for him. We were family. Then one month we couldnt make the rent. He packed up everything he owned, took the baby and left me there in a strange town, an eviction notice, no phone, and no car. I feel abandoned. He still says he loves me and wants to live together when we save up enough money. What is going on here? I think that I should move on, what do you think? I do still love him, even though I am hurt and angry.
2006-12-05 13:44:17 · 21 answers · asked by sarra 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I already have my baby back or I wouldnt be worried about him!
2006-12-05 13:52:09 · update #1
i feel obligated to answer your question, because i don't want u to make any irrational decisions.
first of all, don't just listen to anyone, you are the person who knows that man the most and u can understand him...maybe he wanted to be sure about your child's safeness, maybe he just got scared, talk to him if u can find him...find out why he did what he did...after all, u 3 are a family, you have to resolve your issues inside it.
i wont recommend giving up that easily...that should be your last option.
THINK BEFORE U MAKE ANY MISTAKES
Goodluck!
2006-12-05 13:55:31 · answer #1 · answered by 3rdUser 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
wow, what a jerk. I'm sorry that he left you the way he did, but sweetheart, you're better off without him. you do not need to be with this man. he is no good for you or your baby. you just concentrate on getting your life back together. talk to your mother, and I'm sure she will let you come back home and get things back on track. you need to get yourself a job and take care of you and your baby. do not worry about this man, he's not worth it. and don't you dare let him talk you into staying in that town, and certainly not with him. you go back home with your baby. if this loser really cared about you he wouldn't have left you in a strange town with nothing, and he wouldn't have left you and taken your baby. by all means, you should move on. there are good guys out there who will love you for who you are and won't treat you the way this guy has. and they will love your baby too. this guy you were with is 36 yrs. old! and what a loser! you get out of there and get your life back. you've had enough taken away from you.
I Wish You and Your Baby the Very Best.
2006-12-05 22:54:01 · answer #2 · answered by atiana 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That doesn't sound like something you do to someone you love?!?!?!
I've been in the same situation and we both agreed that my daughter and I would move back in with my mom. He took a job doing long haul trucking so that well all didn't have to live with my mom. When we got back on our feet we got another place and he is back home doing short haul.
Never once in this did one of us take off and leave the other hanging. That's just not what you do. I think that once your a family (married or not) you do what is best for the family not the individual.
2006-12-05 21:53:27 · answer #3 · answered by babydragonspawn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am truly sorry for the situation you have been put in but, dont allow this man to keep doing this to you. If he honestly loved you do you think he would take your child away from you and leave you all alone with no place to live? Come on! First thing, get your child back! Then, move on with your life because you will find a man who will treat you like a queen...even when your both broke!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-05 21:51:06 · answer #4 · answered by tori_817 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What kind of coward did you get involved with here I wonder?
Why on earth did you have a child by him?!? You`re not even married yet for God`s sake! What was the damn rush??? Ever heard of birth control woman?
You make your bed, you lie in it. That`s my opinion and I respect it. Do you?
In your mid to late twenties, you should be old enough by now to know who you`re dealing with, know what I mean? Serves you right to behave like such a blind idiot!
So what are you going to do now huh? My first instinct would be to leave him in the past where he belongs and move on with your own existence but unfortunately, it`s not going to be as easy as that for the simple fact that you now have a child together. Like it or not, both your lives and destinies are joined together until your child reaches adulthood or, God forbid but s.h.i.t. happens, dies. So, for the sake of your child, give his/her father one more chance, but only one! What do you think? Is this something you could consider? Is this a decision you could live with at all? Think long and hard before making any harsh decisions and/or judgments, okay?
One last thing... You mentioned that your boyfriend still wants to live with you when both of you save up enough money to be in a financial position to do so, is that correct? My concern is the following: when is this going to happen? You certainly cannot sit and wait patiently at home forever for him and, most importantly, how about your child? When is he/she going to be reunited with his/her mother?!? When he/she is a teenager and too old to remember you? Do you currently have regular contact with your child at least? Let`s hope so hey? Is your child living with your boyfriend and his family at present?
Good luck to you and all the best in life and love!
I feel for you, I truly do! I can feel your pain, your hurt, your anger, your frustration, your heartbreak and anguish and I`m sure a lot of other people do too! I just hope and pray that your own family is near you to give you the support you emotionally and financially need and deserve!
2006-12-05 22:16:16 · answer #5 · answered by Lolita Angel Rose Taylor-Kennedy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds to me that your man is immature, and you shouldnt have to wait around for a 36 year old to MATURE!
You got yourself into this situation, and there is no way out of it since you have a child together. By Him leaving you with your kid and leaving you homeless is NO sign of Love .
What you need to do is get custody of your kid, or try to work something out there. Get a job, and figure out what you need in life. Dont just settle because you need a man to take care of you, be strong, get a job and support yourself. So that if another loser decides to leave you, you can defend your own self.
2006-12-05 21:52:30 · answer #6 · answered by Encouragement 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get the baby and move on you can find some one who will be with you even though you have a child.trust me it is hard to do but you can do it. I left my husband of 3 years and we had been together for almost 7 , took my son and left it was very hard but it makes you stronger when you are truely happy I found some one who was oka with me having a kid and now we have one together and we have been to gether for 2 years.
2006-12-05 21:51:34 · answer #7 · answered by sleepsweet12 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've also sat in an apartment with an eviction notice, but I would not want a life with someone who cut and run at the first sign of trouble.
2006-12-05 21:47:14 · answer #8 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he is a creep n i know u know that too. i am sorry u didnt find out b4 u made his child. but dont let ur child b an xcuse to stay wit a man who aint headed no where in the future. think bout the situation n weigh it whichever u find to b more beneficial work wit it n all the best
2006-12-05 21:56:42 · answer #9 · answered by thebeautifultakiesha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sarra, your boyfriend is only in this for the money. That seems clear to me. How can you expect this relationship to last if every time things get a little tight, he leaves you in the dust? I would go to court and fight for my child. He isn't really interested in a relationship, just someone to take care of him.
2006-12-05 21:51:09 · answer #10 · answered by kamikaze_4021 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋