Hate my daughters choice of men, he is much older and has been mind controling her, mentally abusing her and cheating on her and she is stupid enough to marry him anyway? He wants her for her paycheck and because she is subservient to him. I have screamed at her that she has become his doormat and she still stays with him. I just don't get it and for the life of me. I don't see going to this wedding when I would want to say YES their is a reason you shouldn't be married and probably would say it.
And no I didn't teach her that.
2006-12-05 10:56:56 · 12 answers · asked by December 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
she is your daughter of course you should go to the wedding. This is a worrible question who would skip there joy in lifes wedding. What are you thinking. If that is who she wants you should not be in the middle
2006-12-05 10:59:26 · answer #1 · answered by *♥~♫ jonas_love*♥~♫ 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Tough decision.
I would go and support your daughter, she obviously knows your opinion but going and supporting your daughter will show her that you still love her.
Perhaps try talking to her about a pre-nuptial agreement? If he's only in it for her pay check he'll flip and she may see the light, worst case she'll be protected if/when the marriage fails.
Don't ruin her special day, she'll never forgive you. You don't have to suck up to the groom but you will have to be civil.
It's horrible to think of your own child making such a horrible choice - but it is her choice. Just make sure she knows you'll be there to help her pick up the pieces later on, and that despite HIM you'll always love your little girl.
Hope this helped. Good luck
2006-12-05 20:07:07 · answer #2 · answered by disce_pati_30 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay you screaming at her might be why she is marring him! You owe it to yourself and her to sit her down and say now I just want you to know how I see things please don't get mad just please tell me what I'm seeing is wrong or if it's not then maybe you should think twice about this.
If in the end she says your all wrong you should be a good father about it support her and be there for her and yes even go to the funeral. If you don't except it and at least be polite to him or you risk losing your daughter and possible future grandchildren I've seen it many times. Don't make that mistake if you love her you need to support her. Your being right about him will not replace her in your life.
2006-12-05 19:08:26 · answer #3 · answered by tweet15086 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's your daughter - be patient with her - she will eventually wake up and smell him for the dirty dog he is. If she doesn't then she really wants to be with an overcontrolling S of a B who's old enough to be her father.
Perhaps if you don't have a partner you should find a much younger man to be your escort on her wedding day. Make sure you have a good time. She's an adult and she can make up her own mind - until she finds her mind was on pause for a while!
Sorry.
2006-12-05 19:10:02 · answer #4 · answered by shimmy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
D - I am sorry that your baby is marrying someone whom you don't approve. BUT - she's your daughter - you don't want to miss her big day. She is a grown woman - and this is her choice to make. Tell her one last time how you feel, and then support her. There are so many emotions involved when the guy is not a god one. But - you can't make her do anything. Go to the wedding.
2006-12-05 19:04:17 · answer #5 · answered by Amy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I hope you have not agreed to pay for the wedding. As sad as it is, I would suggest you grit your teeth, and go. The marriage will be over soon enough, and at that point you will help her pick up the pieces and start over.
My parents were able to do this for my first marriage, but it was over in less than three years. I have a wonderful husband and child now.
Best wishes.
2006-12-05 19:00:19 · answer #6 · answered by finaldx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should go to the wedding and speak out when the priest says "is there anyone that thinks that these two people should not be joined in marriage speak now or forever hold your peace" and say it there, then maybe more people will agree with you and maybe she will say no........just an idea. Good luck to you and I wish your daughter even better luck marrying that jerk!
2006-12-05 21:41:57 · answer #7 · answered by Yahoo User 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes its best to just stay in the shadows. yelling doesn't get anywhere. its obvious that she doesn't see what your seeing and theres no way to show her. she is going to have to see it for her self and that means letting her make her own choices and own mistakes and hope that she learns from each one.
no matter what shes your daughter and you love her. you just dont love her choices. go to her wedding. however many times she may get married always go to support her if nothing else. to show her that you still love her despite of everything.
sometimes the biting of the tongue til it bleeds is the best advice you can not tell her. for shes heard it all before and isn't listening.
best of blessings to her and your daughter.
2006-12-05 22:36:10 · answer #8 · answered by lusciousevil 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the wedding, support your child. Children are going to disappoint us from time to time, sometimes, as a parent, you can see a train wreck coming a mile away, but as a good parent, sounds like you guys have probably had numerous conversations about the situation. Bottom line, support her, be there if she falls, uplift her, don't say "I told you so." Be loving. Hard to do, but a must if you want your child to trust you.
2006-12-05 19:02:48 · answer #9 · answered by volkgal 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If her relationship is as bad as you say, then it should be over shortly. You should attend, and not oppose, let her make her own mistakes in life so that she will learn from experience. One more thing when she finally brakes up, make sure you are there for her, not to tell her I told you so, just to support and love her. It worked for me when i made my first mistake in life and married the wrong guy.
2006-12-05 19:07:04 · answer #10 · answered by marisanj 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋