I feel like such a fool... and I let it go on for so long...
2006-12-05 08:45:53 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You are not a fool! You were just in love like we have all sometime...You had a great hope, again like we all have and you believe in better in life, not in the worst stuff - that it.
Do not blame yourself. You are human and have a warm, alive and loving heart...It makes us great and happy, but also makes us vulnerable and we make mistakes, we all do...
What was mistake yesterday, is going to be helpful experience tomorrow!
Do not let your past destroy your future.
2006-12-05 08:46:48 · answer #1 · answered by Bella 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way you feel is normal. You know now you wasting time off your life to put up with such a person. So you ask yourself why did I do that. Only you can answer those question it's between you and God. The thing is you thought this person would love you and you had your eyes wide shut. Now that your away from him it's time to heal your self. I can understand you. I was with a person like that for 10yrs. And I had a lot of healing to do. I starting reading self help books like ten stupid things women do to mess up their lives by Dr. Laura C. Schlessinger she got's all kinds of books and there all easy reading and sold in most book stores and she has her own talk radio show on 640am 12noon-3pm CA time it has teach me alot about relaytionships and people in genarl..and also you need to have a relaytionship with God to start healing too. I don't believe a person can heal them selfs. If that was the case we all be healers. We all need help. But it starts from you.
2006-12-05 17:00:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yup, been there. Here's one thing that bothers me, think about how we all learn things; we start reading with little words, and are taught new, longer ones until we're good at it. This kind of education is true for a lot of things. How are girls taught how to pick a good guy? Not too well is my experience. I wish there were more things like classes available for girls and relationships; red flags to watch for, reality checks for when the relationship has gone on for a while, things like that. I guess what we've got is what they call "the school of hard knocks", which means just plain old experience until you figure out how to do it right. The question you ask is a good one, why DID you let it go on so long? But don't ask yourself this question to beat yourself up. It's time for some serious reflection on what you want out of a relationship, and how you feel about yourself. The scary thing is, patterns in dating or marrying abusive men seem to be pretty common. Now you've got to break whatever pattern made you attracted to, and put up with abuse for so long. So, stop feeling bad about yourself, that is counterproductive. Perhaps you can find a woman mentor to discuss relationships with, perhaps you can do some reading about it. I still wish there were more options for girls to do some real study about relationships, and I think you've experienced enough hard knocks for now. Best of luck, you are not alone.
2006-12-05 16:57:27 · answer #3 · answered by Caper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You saw it but you overlooked it. Why ? Maybe because you thought it would change or that he would change for you. Lesson learned. Why is he such a bad guy ?? I dont know. Most of them are.
2006-12-05 16:49:37 · answer #4 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, don't beat yourself up. I had the exact same thang happen to me. My ex abused me, but kept lying and telling me this and that excuse on how he didn't mean to and it wouldn't happen again. I believed him and the relationship went on and off for 5 months before I couldn't take the abuse anymore. I broke up with him and spent my tiem with the Lord. He healed my pain and now I have the best guy ever in my life. As for my ex, we keep in touch and are friends, but not close or anything. My advice: focus on God. Read the Bible and spend time praying. Listen and wait for God to bring the right person in your life. I waited for 7 months and I'm so glad I did!
I really wish you good luck and I'll be praying for you!
2006-12-05 16:50:44 · answer #5 · answered by ღQueenღ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many women refuse to see such qualities in the men they date believing they have either changed, or that they can fix them. You can't ever change them...
2006-12-05 16:48:15 · answer #6 · answered by occasionallyrowdy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cos you were so in love and love sees no wrong.But at a point in our relationships we need to examine ourselves and not just be blinded by love.Life is all abt experience and am glad you scaled thru dis and saw the bright side of life.Cheer up dear.
2006-12-05 16:56:26 · answer #7 · answered by Missy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let me tell u something some guys just want to be players but some guys are careing and loving u just got to find the right one cause if u dont your never going to be happy what so ever. but if u what to be happy find a guy u can get to know if hes shows respect than u know he could be the one for u.
2006-12-05 16:52:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's because you were in love. Love is blind and it will allow you to allow things to happen to you when you normally wouldn't. Love is tricky and that's probably why you didn't realize how badly he was treating you while in the relationship but once it was over you realized how he was treated you. The key thing is to learn from that and to not let it happen again.
2006-12-05 16:48:16 · answer #9 · answered by beauty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some women have been abused or witnessed some type of domestic abuse since they were little. To them this is normal. Maybe this was your case. To some others, having good sex cures or makes them forget everything. Wrong thinking!!! Wake up to reality!!!
2006-12-05 17:01:45 · answer #10 · answered by pompilio 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋