2006-12-05 08:24:57 · 6 answers · asked by Lovely 4 in Health ➔ Mental Health
I think a lot of it has to do with not being alone. Some people are totally fearful of living their lives by themselves. I also think sometimes, not all times, if you were abused as a child you tend to draw yourself to relationships like this instead of healthy ones.
My sister was physically and emotionally abused by my biological dad and it has ruined her whole life. She can not settle down with a nice guy for very long because she is use to ones who hurt her and don't treat her right. That is basically all she knows. Even though I think deep down she knows it isn't good for her to get into relationships like that, she is drawn to them. I also think at times she feels she doesn't deserve the better things in life including men. My biological dad would literally take nice clothes the public gave to my sister and would throw them away and make her wear the rags she wore everyday. She was made fun of in school and he never wanted his kids to have the best or to have a better life than what we had. He would take all the money people gave to us to help us and use it on himself.
I think sometimes people can overcome the abuse, but it takes a lot of courage to do it. It also takes support from family and friends. This doesn't happen in every case because my sister has all the support she could need and still is drawn towards bad things in life.
2006-12-05 08:39:57 · answer #1 · answered by hanevkidz2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a website that I find has lots of good information about the psychology of abusive relationships: http://drirene.com/
Check out especially some of the writings about the abuser and the victim: http://drirene.com/abuserpages.htm
http://drirene.com/victimpages.htm
The realization that it isn't as simple as just walking away can help some people to start to take the steps to get out of an abusive relationship. It's a very tough thing to deal with. Most abusers are very good at keeping their victims sucked into the relationship a variety of ways, as Dr. Irene's website makes clear.
Most people who are in abusive relationships require professional help to free themselves and to overcome the effects of being in a prolonged abusive relationship. Realizing that help is needed, and that it's okay to need help and ask for it, is a big step towards healing.
2006-12-05 16:46:16 · answer #2 · answered by Karin C 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because your self esteem is being subdued. You need to take a good look at yourself and make the decision that you are somebody that deserves more than what she's getting. Once you realize that you need to love yourself before anyone else, you will be able to get things straightened out or get the heck out of Dodge. Remember, no one deserves to be abused, physically or emotionally.
Good luck !
2006-12-05 16:35:31 · answer #3 · answered by This, That & such 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lack of self esteem, you probably believe that you don't deserve better. You were probably told you brought it on yourself, let me clear that up for you, you didn't.
You are worthy of real love and you don't deserve to be beaten or berated in any way. Please get out of there.
2006-12-05 16:32:10 · answer #4 · answered by LatterDaySaint and loving it 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
disengage feelings; feelings can really mess you up! Think with the brain not the heart.
2006-12-05 16:27:40 · answer #5 · answered by smartbluewater 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dependent personality disorder
2006-12-05 20:23:17 · answer #6 · answered by LIz 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋