Here is a question that I am almost to embarrassed to ask. But here goes, sometimes I find that I am getting so tired and emotionally and physically drained. I stay at home with my 3 kids (5, 2, 1) and run a daycare in my home. I have had some health issues - had a hysterectomy this past May and still dealing with complications with that.
I do want to be at home raising my own kids but sometimes I miss getting out (I used to be a paralegal). I find that I can be a little more irritable at my kids and my husband and can't seem to get any cleaning done in the house as I feel completely EXHAUSTED.
Any help would be appreciated....
2006-12-05 08:17:06 · 16 answers · asked by ? 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Thanks to all of you who have answered my question and gave me such good suggestions! :)
2006-12-05 08:29:36 · update #1
Are you me? I am at home with my three all day also. All day, everyday. My husband works LONG days, the laundry piles up, the bills, it is hard to get to the market, I rarely wear makeup. I used to be a chef, I miss those days. I get really really irritable, and find I get no sympathy from the outside world. Can you hire a house cleaner. That helps a little. Take one load at a time. Spend time with each child alone if only five minutes a day, this helps me to reconnect with them and they behave better. Mine are 4, 2, and 11 months. I feel for you. They have MOMS clubs or support groups out there for moms. They have monthly or weekly nights out. Hire a babysitter, enlist help. Have a pedicure. Put on lifetime or surf the internet in your not really free time, because there is so much to do. Hope this helps. Good luck! You are making a huge difference, tomorrow will prove it.
2006-12-05 08:25:45 · answer #1 · answered by Serious 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I have a similar problem. I have 4 kids and juggle work and university. If you really need the money cutting out running the daycare is not an option, but if you could, i would do that. What you need is more help. I would hire someone to come twice a week and clean the house or wash the laundry. Can you hire someone to watch the kids while you take a small trip to the store or just sit and read, or clean the house. I know these may be silly suggestions to some, but when I moved to another state I realized how much I depended on my family. They helped me in all the ways I have suggested to you. Now that I dont have that, I get burnt out too.
2006-12-05 08:32:12 · answer #2 · answered by Mystie 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm a stay at home mom and have been for 8 years. It is draining! Children have 5 times more energy than us adults and we are supposed to keep up with them, keep up the house (while they are continuously tearing it down), and be super woman! There are days when I just wish I could run away and be just me myself and I...no one to take care of but myself. Of course I would never do that...but you know that feeling! I've cried before because I was so exhausted that it was literally painful. Sounds like you need some time to yourself. I enjoy being home in a quiet house. I find that is so relaxing to me. I would suggest finding a sitter for the kids and doing something that you enjoy. Make it an overnighter so you get a good nights sleep and can sleep in. It often will be a good refresher. Do it as often as you can and don't feel guilty about it. You deserve some adult time without having to be people's maid! Everyone else get's vacations...good luck! I totally feel ya though.
2006-12-05 08:23:48 · answer #3 · answered by jamie_0778 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you feel.. I am also a at home mom with 4 children 14,7,4 and I recently had a 1 month old. It is totally exhausting and I need a vacation so bad from my children and husband. I have not been getting any sleep because of the 1 mth old and I have so much work too do at home.. Like cleaning, laundry, homework, making dinner etc.
I feel like I am going to have a nervous breakdown any day now.. My husband does not help me as much as he should because he feels that it is my job to raise the children. I understand that he needs rest too in order for him to goto work but on the weekends he could help me with the 1 mth old. It is so stressful and overwhelming that I can't take it anymore.
I miss my job too, I was working for the bank that was 4 yrs. ago. I would rather work then be at home 24/7 a day... and deal with my children.. Don't get me wrong, I love them it's just so hard when everyone depends on me for everything and I do not get know help at all.. I believe things will get better for the both of us because the children will get older.. Then again who knows.. Good luck to you...
2006-12-05 08:33:03 · answer #4 · answered by Vicky 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Kids can really get you down. Do you have any help with your daycare? Maybe you could find some time for yourself if you did.
I had a hyster when I was in my early forties. It was the best thing! Have you considered HRT? (hormonal replacement therapy). Since my ovaries were removed, it helped me a lot.
Lastly, know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel! When you get to be my age and you hear your own words coming out of your children's' mouths, you will know you did your job and did it well.
I hope you feel better soon.
2006-12-05 08:31:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am right there with you, my children are older and I do not run a day care. If you could cut back the number of day care children, that might help. My youngest is three and in preschool 3 mornings a week, that has been the only thing that has helped me. Sorry I can't give you much advice, just know there are a lot of people in the same boat. They do it get older, more self sufficient and you can get a little bit of down time.
2006-12-05 08:26:27 · answer #6 · answered by applecrisp 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Been there performed that!!! I used to be married for close to 10 years, matters went south after approximately 4 years. I stayed for the entire usual explanations... the children, the church, the now non-exsistent stigma of divorcing. I ended up coming into an extended distance dating and while it ultimately got here out to my husband, and he ultimately noticed he used to be wasting his spouse because of his forget, he perceived to get up and notice what he used to be doing flawed. But by means of then I used to be already in love with the opposite guy... I'm now remarried and my present husband is good conscious of the forget I used to be subjected to and may be very cautious approximately making certain I under no circumstances must think that method once more. The worst factor you'll do is not anything...You die slightly day-to-day within. I selected to reside...and love!
2016-09-03 12:08:09 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a reason women in the 50's were able to take care of the kids, keep the house clean, cook from scratch and do it all in heels..They were drinking all day..or popping pills.
Take a good book, go to the restaurant and order something sinful. Sit back in the booth..eat and read and relax.
2006-12-05 08:27:30 · answer #8 · answered by MELONIE T 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a parent, but I can tell you that if you are around anything to long, you can get burnt out. It's normal. You need to schedule you some alone time for yourself. Take a vacation day and arrange for the kids to be gone. Then spend the day relaxing or doing what you want to do.
2006-12-05 08:25:39 · answer #9 · answered by Mariposa 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
try to get the image of mom holding it all together with a smile out of your head! Its stressful and you never get a break from it -every need any minute for 3 kids and the daycare to boot would leave anyone feeling ragged and its time to put your foot down and declare some "mom time" send the kids to bed early one night-switch off with dad for who takes the kids out for a movie and lunch while the other parent gets to stay home and relax
2006-12-05 08:22:13 · answer #10 · answered by cassiepiehoney 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋