I've been talking to this guy for about a month and a half. Everything seems to be going good but we still haven't made anything official. He told a friend of ours that he wonted to take things slow, I'm taking it to see if he really cares for me on that level. He also said he did like me alot. I just can't help but to think maybe he is just saying that and dosen't really plan to be with me at all. Sometimes I think he is just scared I'm gonna be the one that hurts him. I just don't wont to be waisting my time if it's not gonna be more to it. So if you have any advice Please let me know what you think!!!
2006-12-05 06:27:56 · 21 answers · asked by Lulu 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It means he doesn't want to commit to a decision before he's sure. Even if he does really like you, he may just not be sure yet. You seem to know how you feel about him and what you want from the relationship, but you have to realize that he is not in the same place you are right now. There may be more in the future, but he can't make that decision right now.
If you really do care for him, give him another month or so - without the pressure of officialness, titles, pestering, or deadlines - to get comfortable in the relationship. Prove to him that having you as a girlfriend will be a good thing by showing him how nice it is to have you around, be all loving and supportive and fun. Then, once he's used to it, ask him again if he's ready to make it official or if he thinks this has the potential to become something. If after three or four months he still can't make up his mind, you should move on.
2006-12-05 06:38:06 · answer #1 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I think some of the things you need to ask yourself is.....
1. Who is the one who plans the dates?
2. Does he ask you to go out or are you the one always asking to hang out?
3. Does he call you or are you the one always calling?
If you say he is the one to do all these, then I would say he is into you. He just needs to take it slow. But if you are the one who does all the calling and planning then yes you are being dragged a long, cut your loses
I will have to say that when my bf and I started to date I thought that maybe he was dragging me on for a ride to. But commication really helped. I wanted to understand what he wanted, if a relationship and I needed him to know that I was wanting a relationship and not "just friends". It probally took about 2 months for him to know that he wanted a relationship with me. So taking it slow isn't always a bad thing. But I will have to say don't have sex with him. Not until you have both established where you two stand with the relationship thing. My bf and I don't regret it. We waited 3 months until we had sex and it was awesome. It just makes me realize how much I really do love him. Ok....now I'm rabbling...lol. I hope that some of this really helps!
2006-12-05 06:41:13 · answer #2 · answered by browneyegirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-14 01:59:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same situation, and I have decided to just wait and see. I haven't called as much, because I felt I was being too pushy. Now that I have stopped calling, he's been calling me. I guess he needed time to think about what he truly wanted. Patience seems to be the only answer right now. Good luck.
2006-12-05 06:38:13 · answer #4 · answered by DR OLA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"If a person shows you who they are, believe them" (Maya Angelou)
Ask him point blank what the situation is. Does he want to be with you or doesn't he? If he does what does this mean to him? Every relationship should have expectations and a common understanding from both parties in the relationship. Non verbal communication is sometimes stronger than verbal communication. What he is showing you is different from what he is saying.....Ask him for clearification, but ask him gently giving him the benefit of the doubt.
Hope this helps
Good luck
2006-12-05 06:35:27 · answer #5 · answered by dymps 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually when I say that to a girl it's because I'm not that into her. I don't have a reason not to like her but I just don't want to tell her we are together then 4-5 weeks later I realize that she is not the one for me. Just keep getting to know each other and just go with flow don't push him away.
Don't take it personal. He just doesn't want to lay all of his eggs in one basket.
2006-12-05 06:40:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He maybe heartbroken from a part relationship. Otherwise he doesn't want to go fast with you, he wants to take it slow to make sure things work out the right way.
2006-12-05 06:30:55 · answer #7 · answered by tia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he' s actually the type that wants to get to know e/o first. That's great those type r hard to find. Just let things go slow.
2006-12-05 06:31:12 · answer #8 · answered by Kandy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he doesn't want to rush into things,
you've only know him for a month and a half and perhaps he feels he would like a solid relationship with you before you go into anything deeper.
however, try not to read into whats he's said
2006-12-05 06:31:10 · answer #9 · answered by chpsauce 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he doesnt want u to be clingy and expect him around all the time.
he also might not want to get hurt bc he has been hurt in the past
or he might be keeping his options open so that he can go out and have fun with other girls or have the night on the town with the boys w/o u getting mad
2006-12-05 06:31:52 · answer #10 · answered by jenivive 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋