okay, i need help here!?

Question

hey whats up? i really need some help here! at this church that i go to, there is this guy that i like! his name is mark. we flirt all the time! u know, just like friends. but over the last month, i have started to fall for him! im friends with his little brother, who is my age. and if i ask him out, and he rejects me, or if things dont work out between us, i could lose his friendship and his brother's!! i really like mark, and at times i get the feeling that he likes me! but i dont know how to tell! also, i cant figure out how to tell him that i have feelings for him! does anyone have any ideas?? tomorrow (12-06-06) we are going caroling with church and decorating trees around our town, and mark and i have been paired up to decorate a christmas tree. i was excited when i found this out!! but i dont know how to talk to him! how can i tell him i like him, and hope that even if he doesnt like me that i still wanna be friends????? please people! i need some major advice here!!

i asked this not 10 minutes ago, but noone is answering! i need help!! honestly!

Answer 1

hmm, this is a tough situation, and i think what it comes down to is timing. you obviously like him a lot, and so are at the point where you think you could handle telling him this-your fear is the repercussions. if the timing is right, and you are having a conversation about feelings, or what each of you looks for in a person, you could smoothly and casually drop it in that he's the thing you've been looking for lately, but you love the time you spend as friends, and don't expect anything in return-you just wanted him to know. Sometimes if you come off too needy or "obsessed" it will scare a guy and then he won't want to even be your friend anymore. but, if you just let him know you enjoy the time you spend together, and you do have feelings for him, if he does not, you won't lose him as a friend, but maybe he will start to see you in a different light. and, if he does (i hope so), then it could be the start of something amazing.
i think you need to focus on trying to gear the conversation to that sort of topic, and then just casually drop it in. guys don't want to feel the pressure anyway, and this way he'll get another example of how cool you are as a person, and potentially more in the future.
Good Luck tomorrow! Hope this helps :)

Answer 2

My advice is to be honest. If you keep it in and don't tell him, you will probably start acting different towards him. Although for the most part, men aren't the most observant, that he would probably notice, and then he would question your friendship. Most of the time, men that are interested in a girl, never think that girl can be interested in them also. When you are out carolling and decorating, it is the perfect time to tell him. Just make sure that you choose your words carefully. Don't come on too strong or you may scare him away. Just tell him that you have noticed that there may be something happening between the two of you, and that you are OK with that. Make sure to explain that the friendship is the most important, so no matter what, you don't want to lose that. If you lose the friendship over your feelings for him, then it was never that strong in the first place. Good luck, hope it all works out for you.

Answer 3

ohhh no the eternal dilema. How often does this question come up. Well you're not alone 1000's of young (and not so young) people are going through exactly this thought process right now. From what you have said I think Mark may be one of them. Relax and be yourself, he obviously likes you or he wouldn't be flirting with you. Whilst you are paired with him decorating the tree suggest another activity you might enjoy doing together at some time. You don't necessarily have to call it a date, just see how he responds. What can he say, it's not like your asking him to marry you after all.

good luck (having some miseltoe on hand might help as well)

Answer 4

Hey this is Smyles have just joined. Well, i would play it by ear. Wait. If he likes you it will be obvious. Watch his body language. How often does he smile at you, does he want to talk to you a lot,does he ask you questions and the like. Let the man do all the chasing. Trust me, men love that! They feel it good when they have something to achieve. If that's not enough just keep up the flirting because its so much fun! Enjoy the moments you have together. If you go to church - thats fab. God bless xx

Answer 5

First...calm down.Boy,you sound hyper! You will scare him off if he feels you are desperate for some attention from him as it really comes across in your question.Just play it cool.Smile again..and be nice..talk.Bring up the weather,his little brother,etc.You have a topic with the Christmas tree..ask about his families decorating habits,Christmas traditions,etc.Ask him out for hot chocolate afterwards,or coffee.Make him a stocking to hang..be creative..ask him out to a movie on Christmas Day.Be natural,and listen to him..follow his lead...be happy,and don't show desperation or any disappointment if it turns the other way. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

Answer 6

Hello, relax.. everything will be okay. Don't spend too much time focusing on this issue. Remain still and the answer will be right before you. When you are relaxed and calm , casually bring the matter up and find out where he stands, if your'e not calm when you ask the question to find out where he stands your anxiousness will be communicated as well and can affect the response you might get. No matter how difficult it may be, it is important to find out where you both stand in order to be able to proceed. No matter what be true to yourself then you can be true to him.

Good luck, I hope things work out for you.

Answer 7

my answer to you would be to let mark know how your feel in a kind and sensitive way. Dont push it off on him as if your desperate, that will send him running to the hills, I had the same situation not long ago, I really liked this guy, and I came out and asked him if we can go together, at first he was like (huh) and as time went on, I am noticing that he likes me way more than I like him, he is so sweet, and gentle and I just cannot wait for us to start going together and dating,..keep us updated with what happened, you will be so surprised if he steals a kiss

Answer 8

Do what you'll do while ANY buddy comes over, hang around and speak or play video video games or move do any of the thousand different matters peers do. You're no longer getting married, no have got to make this a construction of any variety.

Answer 9

Sounds like a fairy tale lol... let him know how you feel BUT first tell him that before you ask him or tell him about it that you will always be friends no matter what the outcome... if he rejects you well at least you tried but you will still be friends.. rejection is part of dating, so don't be afraid.. because you never know!

Answer 10

Just flirt with him it's a old school method that still works. If he bites then he likes you too. If you don't know how to flirt just keep looking him in his eyes and give him cute smiles. Do little things to show him that you kinda like him but don't do too much. If he bites then you will know without having to ask him out and that way he don't really know if you like him or not. Just use your girl powers to will him in it will work if he likes you.