alright I just talked to my boyfriend last night who lives in Idaho-where I used to-and now I live in Arizona I am pregnant with his child but he's being a doosh I love him and when he was supposed to call he was doing things he shouldn't and hanging out with friends I called his cousins phone who was there with him and told her to tell him not to call me when he needs me cause I won't be there for him anymore and I hope he's having fun while I'm pregnant I love him, were so far apart, we've been trying to get him down for christmas break but look how's he is treating me and than I go and call him that same night later on he didn't answer-but not just to me, he never answers his phone to anyone....anyways he told me he would call me that day and didn't he didn't even call me after I talked to his cousin what could I possibly say to snap his *** into shape over the phone? I am too scared being pregnant with his kid not to call him everynight,even like this.
2006-12-05 05:51:55 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Call his parents and let them know how you feel and what is going on. They can put pressure on him to stand up and be a man.
Don't play games about who is going to call who, this is a baby we are talking about. Take control.
2006-12-05 05:54:09 · answer #1 · answered by Jon O 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Oh dear you poor thing. No wonder you're in a state. Hormones raging and in a long distance relationship. First relax and take a few deep breaths. Remember this is likely to be as difficult for your boyfriend as it is for you. OK you have the hormones and the pregnancy to deal with, but surprisingly inpending fatherhood can be a very difficult time for men because they don't have that. You are the star of the show, he has to take a back seat, and he's too far away to even be involved. He's probably as scared about becoming a father as you are about becoming a mother.
You need to speak to him face to face. I appreciate that's difficult (OK I have no idea about the geography of america, really not a clue, but I'm assuming it's a long way.) So phone calls are your only option for now, so when you are planning to call him make sure you are completely relaxed and unstressed. Have something else to do in the event he doesn't answer so you are not seething about it. Explain calmly how you feel and if you find yourself getting upset tell him you need a bit of time to think about things and ask him when it would be convenient for you to call him back.
Considering what you said to his cousin i'm not altogether surprised he didn't call you back after that conversation. It's understandable that you feel jealous that he is able to go out enjoying himself which is more difficult for you at the moment. But if he stays in being miserable, does that actually help you? He's not able to be with you supporting you so he probably feels it's not doing you any harm if he goes out with his friends.
Remember it's a rough time for both of you. Think about how you would like him to behave, and tell him, he doesn't have a crystal ball, but make sure you are being reasonable.
2006-12-05 14:05:54 · answer #2 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think it sorta defeats the purpose to tell him not to call when he needs you then you try to contact him the same night. I probably wouldnt answer my phone then either. Anyway, how was the relationship before you moved? did you guys get into sex early, did he treat you better then than he does now, etc...
He could just be a lousy boyfriend... course, it's possible that he was distracted by other things when he was supposed to call, then angry/hurt by you when you had his cousin tell him your message. he might be down for a few days or whatver.
My advice? Keep trying to contact him(not every second of every day) and apologize(sounds weird, i know) and see how it goes... consider moving on... and DON'T GET AN ABORTION.
2006-12-05 13:59:08 · answer #3 · answered by Tyiako. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard, having a baby, becoming a single mom, you will be alone alot, you will be raising a child and he is not pregnant, maybe he is trying to have fun while he can, hopefully he will grow up. I think the best thing to do is tell him what you need, perhaps he could call you a the same time everynight. but you need to understand that you will need to trust him.
2006-12-05 14:09:23 · answer #4 · answered by haileybeth79 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's not ready to be a father and your not ready to let go of him but you have to start thinking for your child and in the end things will fall into place, be the best mother you can be with or without him because if he misses out on his child's life he'll regret it in the end. Try to get more involved in your pregnancy, enjoy the life growing inside you, read articles about being a new mom, go to classes, start making a scrapbook or journal your pregnancy stages. Good luck!
2006-12-05 13:56:33 · answer #5 · answered by sarabmw 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, it takes men a bit longer to adjust to things. I don't think the fact that you are pregnant has sunk in all the way. If i were you I would give him some space, that will give him time to think about things, and come to a realization that he has a responsiblitiy for someone other than himself. If you continue to hound him, it may only push him further away, and that is something you can not afford right now. Try to use your free time to think about the child you are about to have and begin to prepare yourself emotionally for the new journey you are about to take. Time...will help you figure things out. Good luck.
2006-12-05 13:59:31 · answer #6 · answered by DR OLA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry to say this but he is not being to good to you!!!!! And especially since you are pregnant with HIS baby!!!! he should be waiting on you hand and foot.. I had something similar happen to me.. my BF was cheating on me while I was preg with his baby!! Needless to say he is a jerk still adn I have a 15 month old baby that I am raising by my self!!!!! So just prepare your self for anything!!!! good Luck!!! I hope that he is just being a jerk now and will grow out of it soon...
2006-12-05 14:01:13 · answer #7 · answered by laceylu555 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear about that. You sure knew what you were doing when you decided not to use birth control. What a great idea that was.
2006-12-05 13:54:04 · answer #8 · answered by keith s 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry... But if he cared about you he would have call...he would be concerned about you and his baby...
My advice is to let him go; move on...obviously he doesn't care enough about you... He doesn't deserve you...and your child's love...
You have to think about your child now...he/she comes first!!
Hang in there and stick with family...
Good luck!!!!
2006-12-05 13:56:35 · answer #9 · answered by Milkywayman22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt call him anymore wait until he calls you. If he really cares about you or his child he will straighten up.
2006-12-05 13:56:04 · answer #10 · answered by Dolphin 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋