Can I get engaged without a ring ?.?

Question

I am in a long tem relationship and would love to ask my partner to marry me. Problem is Ive been trying so hard to save up for a ring but I am struggling. We live together, plan to have kids soon and any spare cash we have is put away. I plan to buy her a ring soon as a present but not an engagement ring. Could this be used in the same way ?????

Answer 1

I am female, and I've never understood the concept of spending thousands of dollars on a ring that most of us won't wear after the wedding.

It sounds to me like you are allready engaged. If you're living together and plan on having children together, you're allready committed. I suggest you simply buy the wedding rings and perhaps surprise her with a impromptu, small wedding. If you're planning on having children soon, is it really worth it to spend a small fortune on a wedding? Plus it's kind of absurd to have a large, formal wedding when you're allready living together.

Instead of an engagement ring, why not save it for an anniversary ring. That'll give you time to get something nice and it'll be more meaningfull. It'd be a celebration not only of a promise, but of a promise fullfilled.

Answer 2

Be honest with her. Plan things together. Ask her how she wants it to be. Does she want it to be considered an engagement ring too? Ask her what she wants. Tell her what you can afford then let her decide what she wants. Some people will insist on an engagement ring even if it is a small diamond ring, but some won't mind not having an engagement ring and will settle with wearing just the wedding ring when they get married. The bottomline is to DISCUSS everything with her. Make decisions together.

Answer 3

While her practical side would understand why you didn't get the ring, deep down she would probably be sad about it. It's true that the ring is not what your relationship is about and not what's most important, but it does make a girl feel special to have a ring. There are many cheap alternatives out there, you don't have to even have diamonds on it. Just something that symbolizes your love and your bond. You could even check at pawn shops. I know someone who got engaged with the same ring they used as their wedding ring to reduce cost.

Answer 4

Every woman wants an engagement ring, as well as a wedding ring. Given your money situation, she will understand, and say it's not worth it.......but deep down there is a part of her who wants a ring. It is a symbol of commitment. Now sure, you can have the same or greater commitment with out a ring, as the ring doesn't determine the level of commitment, it just symbolizes that commitment for all to see. In my opinion, you should try for some sort of ring.......perhaps a simple one (maybe only 100-150$) that can be soldered to the wedding ring, forming a union........typically engagement rings aren't too expensive.........
If moneys tight you might be able to donate blood or plasma for a few times .....Here is is 25$ per donation for plasma, that's what I did to save up some extra cash for a ring.

Answer 5

She lives with you. I'm sure she will understand. My dad gave my mom a watch for their engagement (At the request of my mother who hates rings) Any ring at all can be an engagement present, not just a diamond solitaire. My engagement ring would have been classified as an anniversary ring. The important thing is the thought and the meaning behind your gift.

She is going to love it. Best of luck to you!

Answer 6

I think in this situation, it's really up to the two of you. I don't think this is something that you need to feel you need to conform to society. The point is you're wanting to ask her to marry you and spend the rest of your life with you, what is more important than that?

A good friend of mine wanted a significant engagement ring as she has chubby fingers, but knew on a student's salary that it was not going to be possible to be a diamond. She instead got her favorite stone set in gold with little bitty diamonds around it, it still cost him a bit, but not nearly even $1,000 I don't think and it looks wonderful but most importantly it's uniquely hers.

I also know of a lot of people who don't have engagement rings, only the wedding band.

You do what's best for you and your girlfriend, don't worry about anything else.

GOOD LUCK.

Answer 7

Of course it can be used the same way, except tell her its a 'promise ring'. When my dh and I got married we didn't have much money either. I bought my own engagement band from a local jeweler (it is an estate piece). Once my dh decided he wanted to get married, he told me I could use it as an engagement ring and now its the only wedding ring I wear. Good luck!

Answer 8

It's common etiquette these days for a man to propose to his partner using a cheap ring with the intention of having her choose her own ring at a later time, so I don't see how your situation should be any different. It's not as if a ring 'seals the deal' but for the sentiment and the moment of proposing, I think you should probably use the ring you're going to buy for her anyway when you're proposing to her. Just because it seems like you want to be traditional. You sound like a great guy, best of luck with everything!

Answer 9

In all reality a ring does not matter. But this needs to be considered: if you can't afford a ring then maybe you need to wait on children at the moment. Getting married first and getting yourselves stable is the number one thing before children should come along. Just a thought for you.

Answer 10

You can get engaged without the ring. If she loves you she will understand. Putting off the engagement is worse than not having the ring I would think.