I'm a 22 year old single mother of one. My little girl is one week old. I am very attractive, independant and intelligent-I have a great job, my own home, provide for myself 100%. I am not the clingy/pushy type at all. I'm not on speaking terms with my daughters father-my pregnancy was very unplanned (I was on birth control) and he pretty much abandoned me when he found out (he told me to get an abortion, I don't believe in it so I kept the baby and I haven't talked to him since, he's never seen his child)
I am not ready to date yet...I am planning on concentrating on my daughter for right now. But I would like to eventually...I've spent the past 9 months completely alone and it's been pretty hard. I miss that companionship and comfort that a relationship brings...I was just wondering what guys think of single mothers-particularly one in my situation. Do you think it is going to be hard for me to find love again? Would you ever date or have a serious relationship with a single mom?
2006-12-05 04:37:23 · 15 answers · asked by Rebecca 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I am in my mid 20s, single, and I am an experienced professional. I would not date a single mother I just met, because I'm not ready to be responsible for being a positive role model in the life of a child. Another reason is I am afraid of the potential financial obligations involved... there have been cases where a man has been held responsible for child support, even if he is not the biological father, because he was seen as a "father figure" to the child. That is not a risk I am willing to take.
I hope you and your child the best... just giving you my viewpoint from where I stand in my life now. I suppose each person is different... if I already had known you for a while and we were friends, I wouldn't rule out dating you solely on the fact you had a child.
Oh... and I'm not really an angry drunk, like the name suggests...
2006-12-05 10:36:40 · answer #1 · answered by Angry Drunk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Damn that's a tough spot to be in. I wish nothing but the best for you and your daughter and if the babies dad ran away like you say then you two are probably better off (easy for me to say) without him.
I DO think it will be a little tougher to start a relationship because most guys in your age range arent going to be ready for a relationship with a mom. ( again just my opinion )
I personally wouldnt date or have a serious relationship with a single mom. Like it or not if your getting serious with the mom at some point is going to lead to you having you to establish some type of relationship with the kid too and that just isnt for me.
I'm sure there are some guys out there that feel the exact opposite of what i do. GOOD LUCK
2006-12-05 04:47:33 · answer #2 · answered by RedEye 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kudos to you! wow..that's impressive.
One word of advice though, I would concentrate on the baby for now. Cause there are so many men out there that would be wondering if you are looking for a father for your daughter and it's natural and they may not want to be involved with you. But that's their loss really!
You should be very careful about who you deal with right now. It's imperative that you choose well. Don't let anyone meet your child unless you know that this is the man you want to have a meaningful and committed relationship please.
I totally understand you...cause I have been there and done that. You are young...Choose wisely. and good luck.
2006-12-05 04:47:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, in fact I married a single mom. There are some guys that will shy away from you once they find out that you have a little one, but those are the kind of guys that you really don't want around anyway. When you meet someone who is interested in you, and not just in sleeping with you, the fact that you have a baby won't scare him away. One thing that I respected about my wife when we got together was that it was several months before she even let me be around her son (now our son). Kids can become really attached to people and it is very important that you make sure that the guy is going to be around for awhile before you subject your little girl to any unnecesary emotional trauma, especially since her biological father doens't want to have anything to do with her.
Sorry this is so long winded, but keep things in perspective, keep your little girl first and eventually you'll find that special someone.
2006-12-05 04:48:43 · answer #4 · answered by Big T 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a man, I'm a woman but I have many male friends who will date and marry a single mom. So don't worry at all. When you're ready, I'm sure you'll meet the man who is right for you.
Your baby is one week old. As you already know, bonding with your baby and taking care of her should come before your own needs and desires. Take your time with communicating with the next man and ask lots of questions. There are many single and available men who date single moms.
Good Luck!
Brandie Webb / Author -Relationship Advisor
SITE: http://www.SexyPeopleDating.com
BLOG: http://wwwsexypeopledating.blogspot.com/
2006-12-05 05:18:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although i'm not sure I'd ever be involved with a man with someone else's child. I can tell you my boyfriend as well as several other men I have spoken to, See nothing wrong with dating a woman with a child. Love is out there for everyone, don't be ashamed or worry about it. It'll come when it's supposed to come. Congrats to you for being so strong and having a good head on your shoulders. A man will see that in you.
2006-12-05 04:45:19 · answer #6 · answered by LoveLeighe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think you should be 100% positive of your sexual desire with another woman before you introduce this world to your son, there are a lot of emotions/changes involved on your sons behalf. Do you ever plan on dating a man again and settling down? Do you plan on being with this woman for years on end? Is she a good influence on your son? Would your son approve? If he doesn't approve you will have world war III on your hands, without the proper communication between you two regarding this - it could turn into disaster. Personally I would have a heart to heart with yourself and if your heart strings pull towards this arrangement, the next heart to heart should be with your son. And there ya have it - WONDERFUL advice from the 16 year old's answer right above mine....
2016-05-22 21:27:29 · answer #7 · answered by Cynthia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well Rebecca it's simple, guys are afraid to make a comittment to begin with so with you having a child already it will definitely make it harder. Don't get me wrong, there are alot of guys out there who really don't mind dating a girl in your situation, especially because you are independent. I know personally I would love to have an independent girl, it means that you are definitely more responsible than any other girl in your age group. It might be alittle tough in the beginning but you will soon realize that older men in their late 20's and early 30's will be the brunt of your dating scene if you choose to have one simply because men in these ages are usually more stable in their life with a career already developed. I hope that helps.......Just remember to never let a loser guy into your life because you feel sorry for him. Trust me any guy can make a decent living without having to ask a girl for money.....You're too precious to let a guy take advantage of you.....
2006-12-05 04:45:43 · answer #8 · answered by roddy414 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Seeing that you are not looking for a man to support you and your daughter you should not have any problem dating. Most of the single mothers I know are only looking for someone to take care of them so they can stay at home and do nothing. You seem to have your life together. I would date someone like you.
2006-12-05 04:43:29 · answer #9 · answered by redbull_photo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of men out there will use you for sex because they know they can. Be careful. My advice is make the guy wait awhile before you sleep with him and do not introduce him to your kid until you've been together for a year.
2015-09-29 19:30:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋