Did she break us up? What's ur opinion?

Question

A "friend" of mine and my ex bf never liked each other. Only tolerated one another for me. When problems between my ex and I arose, I'd tell her; she'd share problems with her men too. But she started talking to my ex too; and they also shared the problems they had with their significant others with each otfher too. I had no problem with this because my ex really didn't have anyone he could talk to about "us", and everyone needs that, to be objective. Well, she always told us we should call it quits since we fought a lot. She's against inter-racial uniions, so we ignored her. But then one day she came and started telling me things he said about me to her...like how he doesn't like the fact that I want him to quit drugs(pot), and how he's not ready to go to school, so he doesn't like the pressure(but he never told me). They also discussed hooking me up with someone more "suitable" for me. I asked him about all this and he said a lot of words got twisted around. He said he'd been uhappy,

for a year. So I broke up with him; but remained friends. He explained himself stating that all "friend" spoke of was getting stoned, so it was hard not to think of smoking, and that he was only unhappy at various times during that year and it had to do with my drug ultimatum. He said he didn't think he was ideal for me, but he never suggested hooking me up with someone. Then, my "friend" changed her spots. She tried to control my life.(oh, I let her stay with me for two months, that's when all this happened). She started telling me my cooking and eating utensils were a piece of crap, and that I shouldn't want to stay in my apartment(it's a shithole), and she would call my ex and complain about me. I told her that I didn't have any money for food, so i'll break up with him when I did. She said she'd feed me if the break-up happened before I got money..and she did for a week(I took us out a bit too), but then she complained of feeling used since I consumed her food. No more room,4 stuff

Answer 1

what you need to do is sit them both in the same room and talk to them at the same time you should now them both well enough to tell who is not being as honest as you would want them to be

Answer 2

If she was that involved in your relationship then there is always the possibility she manipulated the situation a little or even a lot. You also mentioned you and your ex were fighting quite a bit and there were things he was doing that you didn't agree with. It sounds to me like although it is irritating to believe someone got in the middle of your relationship and helped to destroy it that it was perhaps a good thing the two of you split up. I wouldn't invite her into another one of my relationships because there is some mistrust between the two of you. To answer the question though I think she may have had something to do with it but she is only partly to blame as there are many reasons relationships fall apart.

Answer 3

Wow. It sounds like to many people were involved in your relationship. I dnt thnk she broke you guys up, but she did play a part of the relationship. From the sounds of it, the relationship was never real strong to begin with. One thing that i have learned with time, its okay to vent but be careful on who you vent too. To me your friend was really not your friend. Also if he was unhappy, there must of been signs that you chose not to see. Sometimes we as human, try to avoid the truth. By doing so we only hurt ourselves. Hang in there, life goes on. We have to have experiences to grow as adults. Good Luck

Answer 4

it sounds to me like this woman's main objective was to split you guys up for one reason or another. She wouldnt have been able to do it though had your bf not said things to her in the first place. Men need someone to confide in, and sorry to sound sexist but it usually helps both people if its another man.

Good Luck and tell your ex and ex friend to chase their tale out of your life

Answer 5

Think of it this way...if she did break you guys up, which by the way I think you guys did on your own, it was a blessing to you. Consider this time apart for what it is...freedom. Freedom to find the kind of guy that you want to grow old with, raise kids with, and spend endless hours with. I am blessed because my wife and I are best friends and love each other...it makes life easy! Seek someone to grow old with...not to argue with or worry about!

Answer 6

She helped you to break up with him, sometimes it better not to tell friends everything because they turn out not to be your friend for real but will stay long enough to see what they can get out of it. It sounds like she had her eyes on him from the beginning. They always act like they don't like them, but then start to plot and plan.

Answer 7

sounds like he didn't want to be with you and she's a rotten friend. I'd drop both of them for good and find a new friend and guy.

Answer 8

YES IN MY OPINION SHE DID...UR FRIEND IS VERY NOzY....SHE SHOULDNT HAVE BEEN SUCH A INSTIGATOR...I BELIEVE IF U LIKE HIM TRY AND WORK THINGS OUT..AND FOR THE FUTURE A RELATIONSHIP IS BETWEEN 2 PEOPLE NOT 3...

Answer 9

personally i would tell your friend to stay out of it... you have to work your own problems .... i think the fault is between the three of you... both you and your b/f allowed for her to take advantage.

Answer 10

so where is the rest of the story