I have a friend whom I have known for about 10 years now, problem is that she is driving me crazy. It seems like everytime I tell her about something she has to add in her two cents about how I am wrong in someway. Be it something like adding water to my car (which she tells me common sense things like not to add cold water to a hot car) or how to raise my child (apparently my choice not to spank my 5 year old is wrong because he will never behave, even though he behaves very well most of the time). It is always something when she is around, she just really must think she knows everything and the rest of the world is ignorant. I am just at my wits end here lately and would really like to point out to her that I am not an idiot and I don't lack common sense. She seems to think that I haven't lived as much life as she has or something, but the truth is that I am an educated adult. Should I just ask her if she really thinks I am that stupid or what?
2006-12-05 02:19:36 · 13 answers · asked by averyanne77 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Just thought I would add that she is my neighbor and we live in a little bitty town, or I wouldn't talk to her as much. I certainly never ask her for advice, and I try not to bring things up around her, but sometimes it is hard. Maybe i will be rational about it and talk to her instead of punching her, but I did like that advice.
2006-12-05 02:56:47 · update #1
Sounds like this is putting a strain on your 10 year friendship...she must be so comfortable around you that she feels its necessary to give you her advice every time she feels like it.' If you really value this friendship....I would have a heart to heart with her.....She'll stop once you point this out to her...let her know that it is starting to bother you. If she is this type of person anyway....with everyone....you might want to distance yourself for a while...and only take her in small doses... Sounds like you need a break.
This happens to some friends after so many years!!!
As far as the advice that she gives you....its to make her feel better about herself.......she doesn't think you are idiot...its the opposite....she really looks up to you!!!!
2006-12-05 03:44:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you still friends with her if all she does is stress you out?
There has to be some good in her, or you would stop talking to her. Most of her advice is probably not because she thinks you are stupid. She is just concerned for her friend and doesn't express it correctly. Next time she gives you common sense advice, just say thanks, but I already knew that, and when she says children should be hit for discipline, just say, you know what, that's your opinion and your entitled to it, but this is how I've chosen to raise my son and I wish you would respect that and stop bringing it up. Some people have strong opinions and want to share their "knowledge" with the world whether the world wants to know or not. If you are really tired of her, quit talking to her so much and eventually she will go away and find someone else to help.
2006-12-05 02:29:06 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Address this her and stand on your own two feet. Tell her your child is your responsibility--not hers and you will raise your child your way not hers.
Always putting her two cents in sounds like there might be some jealousy of you on her part. If you're at your wits end--you must let her know--she hasn't got a problem telling you!!
2006-12-05 02:39:38 · answer #3 · answered by smeezleme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a touchy subject but if it's that bothersome, then I'd call her out on it. I'd just be like look, I'm grown and I don't need your advice on how to raise my child/etc. Good luck, and if all else fails punch her in the face.
2006-12-05 02:21:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just be like, "look, We are close friends and as a friend I am going to tell you something. I dont need your opinion on how to raise my son, or what to do to my car, I understand that you think you are trying to help, but it frustrates me. So please stop!" My friends have to lecture me sometimes about talking too much.... Just be as honest and polite and straightforward as possible. Thats how my girls are, and I can understand them better when they are straightforward with me. Good luck
2006-12-05 02:22:52 · answer #5 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all, your the mom, she shouldnt be tellin you how to raise your kid. If she is actin like she is always right then so be it. she is being an annoying know it all, ask her if she thinks that your are stupid. chances are she will say no, then just tell her whatever and leave. shell figure it, maybe she will apologzie and try to change if not, your better off without her.
2006-12-05 02:24:07 · answer #6 · answered by Hannah V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as though she is jealous of you, so she tries to cover it by criticizing you all the time. Tell her how you feel. If she doesn't take the hint, try not seeing her as much. And I applaud you for not spanking your child.
2006-12-05 02:24:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anniesgran 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people are just like that. If you choose to keep her as a friend, you will just have to refrain from sharing ideas with her that you don't want her to shoot down. It sounds like she is cutting you down to make her feel better about herself.
2006-12-05 02:22:36 · answer #8 · answered by clifsdi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are not stupid at all. my best buddie is like that too. I know its hard but dont take it personaly, She is not attacking you she just wants whats best for you .... however you may want to remind her that you have a mother and dont nned a 2ed one. tell her you value her and your friendshipp but call her out on her ...overbaring attitude.
2006-12-05 02:25:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her about it, but, be nice... you don't want to lose a friend over her giving too much advice. She is probably just trying to be helpful.
2006-12-05 02:23:06 · answer #10 · answered by LittleLady 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋