Why are there some women and men on here that defend dead-beat parents?

Question

I am not getting the logic behind their responses. Yes, I know there are two sides to every story and we are getting only one, but some of the female and a few male responses justify that it is okay for a man to not play a strong father figure and blame it on the woman. I just read a response that defended the absent father, the responder justified it by saying, maybe the ex makes it difficult when he tries to contact the child. So what!!! Who cares if the ex is difficult to deal with, it is about the child. No matter what the circumstances their is a child's life at stake and nobody has an excuse for not being a participating parent. Could somebody please tell me what they are thinking when they make excuses for dead-beat parents.

Answer 1

I think people that defend dead-beat parents, are naturally a part of that group. It's easy to make excuses for poor actions.

Answer 2

I think there are many variables and you have valid points as well. If the ex makes it so difficult that the non custodial parent cannot go on with their life (ex. stress creating work or relationship problems), sometimes a hard choice has to be made to butt out till the child is older. it should always be a last resort. Also, I feel more than a little resentment against those women who intentionally get pregnant (lying about birth control) and then expect a man to be thrilled and 'step up to the plate' when he was deceived and lied to. (both parties are responsible for birth control, but if one says they are taking the responsibility, then be truthful about that). It is sad indeed when children suffer because the adults in their life can't get it together and be sensible and mature and unselfish.

Answer 3

Difficult to say as I didn't read your previous question or have seen any of the responses. In regards to this issue, though, it seems like you have experienced this first hand and you seem quite angry at dead-beat parents in general.

I'd suggest dealing with your own situation and trying to find out how to get past these feelings. I know, easier said than done. But until you understand why you were ignored / abandoned, you won't be able to get past your feelings of anger.

Maybe he really didn't care, maybe he moved miles away and when he called, your mom refused to answer / hung up the phone. No one really knows and no one can say. The only person that can give you the answers you need is the person that has caused you this pain. If you can't talk to them directly, I suggest that you see a counsellor to get your feelings out and talk to someone that can maybe guide you past your anger.

Most times, DBP's are unjustified, but you never know, there may be a case when the person does everything in their power to see their child and can't. Only one person can tell you that, and it's not me or anyone here. But you know where to find them.

Answer 4

I'm a single parent. I've had custody of my son for 6 years. Prior to that I paid non-enforced child support to the tune of $5000.00 per year. My ex, since I was awarded custody, has vanished form the face of the Earth and I receive no support from her. The only real damage done is to my son, who cannot understand why his mother refuses to make any contact with him. Personally, I wouldn't want her in my house because she's a pathological lier who chose her child abusing boyfriend over her son. Yes, she's a deadbeat, but the alternative is not necessarily better.

Answer 5

Honey, i've got self belief so sorry for you - i'm a female and this female began having a bypass at me and that evening I had an adverse dream that me and my guy have been all romantic on the park and the lady got here out of nowhere and battered the **** out of me infront of my guy and that i grow to be thoroughly humiliated, like it felt so genuine and that i only needed to run away and cover from the international exceedingly him! besides decrease back to you, you get carry of overwhelmed up by way of fact unfortunatly there are disrespectful ***** in this international, yet consistent with possibility throwing the 1st punch did no longer help the region that would desire to of been saved for later. You did no longer deserve it in any respect and nor did your female! i'm takin it they threw water at her and that i fantastically effective they might of punched her or inflicting some form of soreness to her breasts, they might of tried to rape her additionally (you would be able to desire to confirm) i do no longer understand why she's no longer speaking to you, shes the two being unfair or they have traumatised her phycologically and he or she only won't have the ability to locate the words to speak to you. I have not any concept why female continually get extra help then adult males, consistent with possibility by way of fact female are in particular extra vunreable then adult males, besides the fact that this isn't any longer continually the case. My suggestion may well be to interrupt the ice check along with her calmy, if she would not wanna talk then write her little notes to get her speaking. some thing looks incorrect along with her and you do no longer understand what they carried out to her at the same time as you have been knocked out, in case you only won't have the ability to get by using to her then i might call a councilor around. the two way you would be able to desire to confirm what's incorrect along with her, why she's only ignoring you - you do no longer deserve it and you adult males p.c. eachother. stable success :)

Answer 6

Not defending, probably. Just citing the possibilities as to why, to answer the question at hand.

Answer 7

They are probably dead beat parents themselves... I cant find any other excuse for them..

Answer 8

Someone has to anwer themselves!

Answer 9

I don't know, I never would