Does anyone know a place where someone could send a teenager?

Question

I know a teenager who just seems to do everything the wrong way. Even though she graduated from High School, she never fails in doing what's wrong. She doesn't steal or break the laws, she just needs a lot of help and she has a lot of idiosincracees. For instance, she loves to stay out all night even though we tell her that that's not right. She refuses to go to college even though we told her she'll have a hard time finding a job if she doesn't go. Also, she refuses to eat in front of other people at home or in a restaurant. She also never washes her clothes and her room and her pocketbook always looks a mess. She also goes out in pajamous sometimes and takes 3 hours to get dressed. She is not a person who should go to jail, nor is she a person who belongs in the crazy house. She is a person who has a lot of problems and she needs someplace to go so she can be told what's right and wrong. I try to tell her but it goes in one ear and out the other. I wish there was a place

Answer 1

Can you try "continuous" unconditional love, dialog, reasoning, and perhaps spend a day week or month or whatever it takes with her, and I mean with her, before you give up?
God bless, please try harder

Answer 2

Well first off, your daughter does not seem any different than most other teens I know of. Your daughter in fact sounds much like I used to be, but I turned out to be very successful in what I do. It's not that your daughter is lazy or incompetent, she just hasn't found what her calling is yet. She needs some motivation, and sometimes painting yourself into a corner is the way to do it. It sounds like your daughter enjoys being a teenager, so let her. She will find in time that there is a world out there to conquer, and she must get out there before it conquers her. Not to sound too judgemental, but your statement alone may indicate that maybe she doesn't have enough support at home if your trying to offload the problem somewhere else. Are you guiding or dictating? There is a difference.

Anyways, I wouldn't panic until she turns 25 and still acts like this. Until then find out why she feels so unmotivated, maybe she's just scared of her future. Have you tried talking to her about how you first made out when you were her age instead of talking about consequences of failing?

I'm not at all saying your a bad parent, I just find this situation a lot like my own when I was younger. I eventually found my own way like most kids do. Remember that life doesn't always coincide with TV drama teens.

Good luck.

Answer 3

If she graduated from high school, she is a young woman. There isnt much you can do for her except talk to her. You can't send an adult to a boot camp or such. There are support groups and even youth groups that could help. But, the main thing you should do is mind your own business. The only way for her to change is for her own self to decide to change.

Or you could do it differently and think of it this way: "If you want something done right, do it yourself" Do her laundry, show her how to get organized. Buy her things to get organized. But there is always a chance that she would get dependant that way. I didnt get organized until I was almost 22. I basically woke up one day and was like "wow! everything is left out and just a mess!" Just takes motivation. She really has to want to do it.

Good luck!

Answer 4

If she is not working then give her chores to do..let her know that she has to earn the right to live there since she is no longer in school..if the car she has if she has one is one that you bought take the keys when she comes home past curfee..for her clothes DON'T wash them when she is out and throws a fit inform her that she is old enough to wash her own and be done with it no arguing she has to learn responsablity and never will if you keep doing everything for her...If she wants to live in a pig stye fine when she pays the bills till then,..get a box or trash bag and go in her room everything that is on the floor put in there and inform her that you threw them out that as long as she is in your house she will not live like that...THIS IS NOT A PHASE!! SHE WILL NOT GROW OUT OF IT UNLESS YOU HELP HER understand that it is not the way of life...I am a mother of 4 kids from ages 16 to 1 and they do thier share @ the house...I am also a stay at home mom but that doesn't mean I am a maid..if they don't learn to do it they will not learn responsablity in all aspects of life...

Answer 5

This child could benefit from therapy or a psychiatrist. She sounds like she may possibly have a form of mental illness. She could be bipolar or have borderline personality disorder or even severe depression problems. The hygeine and disorganization are classic symptoms. If she is under 18, you need to get her to someone for treatment, if she is over 18, you need to give her all the info and help her set something up. She may be resistant or like my daughter, she may be relieved to finally get help. Good Luck and don't give up on her. We all need help sometimes.

Answer 6

Send her somewhere? Hell no,.. that costs money,.. the only thing you need to send her is a message... in the form of a slap upside the head!

Basically, its like this,.. if she lives in your house,.. its your rules... if not, she leaves. If this is a problem, and there was an apparent failure to raise her on someones part, then I suppose shes stays and somone bites the bullet of responsibility in undertaking the slow rehabilitation needed in order right the ship. I mean, if you brought someone into this world, you sure as hell need to prepare them to stand up in it on there own, and not just look for a quick fix or place to "dump" them off on when the goin gets tough. I mean,.. seriously,.. If you give up on them,.. what kind of morales and attitude do you really expect from them in the first place?

Answer 7

I recommend Outward Bound its a outdoor school that focus on helping people of all ages better know themselves and enabling there potential. They could her identify her unseen straights and help her change her unproductive behaviors. They have many programs all over the world tailored to all kinds of people
look them up they are wonder full they saved me as a non functioning teenager
there programs are not punitive and very positive

Answer 8

There are psychiatric hospitals everywhere. call the police and tell them you sense like killing your self and choose help. I completely understand what you mean with the aid of "time-honored uncomplicated." i think the same way dude, each so often I purely sense like i opt for to run off and experience existence's street because i understand there is extra to existence than what's before our eyes. contact me in case you opt for.

Answer 9

Sounds like she's just being a teenager! Calm down, like you said she's not breaking the law etc, so count your blessings.

Answer 10

brat camp its the way forward or just kick her out when shes 18! tell her to get a job and act like a normal person, she will learn in time!