i like this guy but a few problems i gota kid and dunno if he wants to have kids also he doesn't have a job really or a place of his own hes 26 and i really liek him and hes really sweet what shall i do
2006-12-04 21:22:39 · 10 answers · asked by leanne b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
1) Does he know about your child? If so is he accepting?
2) Dating doesnt = living together right away
3) Is he looking for a job or his own place ... have any income ??
4) If you guys end up loving one another wouldnt only #1 be important?
2006-12-04 21:28:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leanne please do not jump in without giving this a great deal of thought. You say you have a few problems, your child is not a problem you are a mother and at this point in your life your child must come first. If you get involved with this man he will end up moving in with you and without a job he will become a free loader which you can not afford. You have a child to keep so if he likes you enough to want to go out with you, let him get a job and a place of his own then you will both be on the same footing in which to start this relationship. Then if things go well for you both, you can always get a place together later on. Sheila.
2006-12-04 21:38:28 · answer #2 · answered by she shaw sea shore 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that's its irrelevant as to whether he wants children or not as he isn't caring for himself! So how can he care for a child.
Does he live with his parent? Is he still at Uni?
Or is he on the dole?
He may have some sort of social problem (IE Jonny in Two Pints?) A severe lack of confident or some sort of emotional problem.
If you could be a supportive Girlfriend and help him to over come this then you may have a future. But this would be extremely hard work!
But while he is in a mess you should not let him move in.
May be for the moment it would be better to keep him as a friend as you have your child to care for. And this way you can assess his capabilities in the way of relationships.
2006-12-04 21:59:40 · answer #3 · answered by kiku 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication! communciation! u r not gonna get the answers until you sit down and ask him all those questions. that way the path will be much clear for both of you.
Think seriously abt his lack of job and no place of his own. is this what you want? whats the potentiality of him getting a job and his place? these things are very important at the long run.
Talk! talk! talk! talk to him!
2006-12-04 21:28:22 · answer #4 · answered by Essie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you just need a guy that at least has a job, you have a kid to think about,they come first, if he doesnt want kids or like them then he doesnt want you ,that child is a part of you and a guy that you are with would have to want you both or it would not be a very good relationship
2006-12-04 21:30:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
its a tricky one . . . i want to say that whats inside is more important than how he lives his life but if you have a child you have to think about their needs too. if you do end up in a relationship and he becomes part of your childs life what kind of role model will he be if he is 26 and doesn't have a job.
why doesn't he have a job? is he lazy? cos if he is then he will be lazy in your relationship as well.
obviously i don't know either of you and if you are going to end up together then you will anyway but i would say to tread carefully and go slowly - don't introduce your child to anyone that is not going to be a part of your life for a long time otherwise you will just confuse them.
2006-12-04 21:30:01 · answer #6 · answered by Empress 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hi hon,don't let him free load of you for a start.if you like him kid shouldn't be a problem ask him out and get someone you trust to look after your child,go for a few drinks and be straight with him tell him how you feel and what you want also tell him your concerns about his life style,but personally i wouldn't let him near the child.make sure your kid remains your priority.
2006-12-04 21:33:41 · answer #7 · answered by karen. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
speak to the guy and let him know you have kids don't let him meet them untill you are sure he is right, have a few dates with him and chats find out all about him don't let him come to your house and when you feel the time is right for him to meet your kids meet out somewhere don't invite him into their space to quickly and most of all be careful
2006-12-04 21:30:16 · answer #8 · answered by bobbyb 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just chat to him and see how it goews, invite him round for coffee and see what he is like with kids, if he likes you too he will make the effort
2006-12-04 21:25:58 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him if he wants kids
2006-12-04 22:42:18 · answer #10 · answered by Blade 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋