PLEAse help me..IM so depressed over this guy! U have to read this please! help me :(((?

Question

this guy..that i was involvedd with..me and him did stuff together.we even had sex..and he still contacts me and talks sweetly and romantically with me...and even said he was thinking to go long term with me..so i guess he likes me..but i found out he is trying to look for other chicks...in his CASTE..(as we r indian)..for MARRIAGE..he is also trying to get to know others.from his own religion..and flirting around w. them..and possibly marry them..why is he doing that if he likes me..How can he do that.>PLS TELL ME WHAT SHUD I THINK N WHAT SHUD I DO? SHUD I CONFRONT HIM? n be like why da hell r u wasting my time if ur gona look for other chiks?? M i over reacting? or IS HE WRONG?..ths all I want to know..JUST ANSWER THAT N ADVISE ON WHT TO DO PLS!!! isnt he soo wrong?!! n how i know is cuz i like him so much that i made a fake id and tested him to c how he was..n he was really flirty and stuff....:((((

so PLEASE TELl me what shud i do? we have many options here:
1- stop talking to him ,cut his contact, ignore his calls???
2- do the same to him , flirt with his friends
3- confront him n tell him off, tell him to quit wasting my time???

PLEASE TELL ME>>IM DYING...

Answer 1

first do number 2: try to be with his friends and flirt with'em.
then number 3:confront him.
then number 1:ignore his calls.

Answer 2

He is an asshole. He was lying when he said he wanted to go long term with you, if he's also doing all this other stuff on the side. I would say:

1. Call him, make a meeting. Ask him, WITHOUT BEING ANGRY, what the status of your relationship is. Just for information, no accusation. If he lies, you know he's a psycho who needs therapy and a guru, along with some meditation to instill ethics.

2. If he refuses a meeting, try an email - again, no accusation, just informational questions about how he views your relationship.

3. If he doesn't reply, forget him. You haven';t done anything wrong - its his behavior that has been deceptive. He will get his karma payback, you just keep being an honest person.

Answer 3

Not no 1 cause you wont have closure.
Not no 2 cause that will only make the problem worse.
So this leaves us with option no 3.
Confrontation is the best,you get to say what you want and you can get closure.You can also get the full story straight from the horse's mouth.But i will advise you to think about everything that you want to say to him and what you want out of the confrontation.Good luck!

Answer 4

You need to sit down and talk to him about what you have found out instead of just assuming the worst find out from him what is wrong and right . If you have to go to the extremes of being fake you have no trust and possibly for good reason. I dont think either of you sound ready for a commitment of marriage.

Answer 5

I tested a guy by creating a fake ID and what i saw buffled me. hhe was flirty and actually inviting girls for sex. saying he didnt Have a girlfried and stuff like that. U know what i did? i showed him the boot.

In your case, he is not yet decided what he wants, he cant want to go long term yet flirts and looks for other girls. Trust your instincts your heart is precious to eb broken by somebody who doesnt see the sun shining from your eyes.

He may love you but he is not yet decided that you r the one.

all the best

Answer 6

I am not familiar with customs of your tribe, but I am familiar with these types of relationship. he does like you, but only likes you for what you have right now and nothing else. if he is looking for other girls to marry, it means that he is not into you in this area. i think that you should stop seeing him and find somebody else. there are a lot of other guys around. he is not treating you right and you deserve better. if you flirt with his friends and stuff like that, you are foing to end up feeling really hurt, and this is wrong. if you feel like you want to comfront him and tell him how you feel and everything do it. but my advise is to keep away from him and find someone else.
good luck :)

Answer 7

well u two are not a couple if he wanted long term with you but your not a couple... sounds like you turned him down. So he's not putting all his eggs in one basket so to speak. Why doing you confront him and tell him how you feel and try a long term relationship??

Answer 8

Wow. And I thought only American Females were dummies.

He Screwed you, in more than one way.

Phsyically and Emotionally.

I thought the women in your culture were not promiscuous?

Im going to tell you the truth, he seems to have used you for sex.

Stop being such a sucker, what will you tell your future husband when he asks about your "chastity"?

Answer 9

if you are going to marry someone else
is there any meaning in stick to him
you might be looking good and hot so he wants you.
if he in real love with you , he would hav married you, instead of searching other girls. you ask him politely what is his plan.
whom he is going to marry. wat kind of relationship he is going to maitian with you. does he want only sex from you. he may try to console you by saying i love you or in romantic way, so just ask him to asnwer straight away. its you life.

there is no meaning in flirting with his friends. wat wil you do if his freinds also do the same.

Instead get engaged with a guy who can love you and wil love you truly.

hope you wil hav a better tomorrow

all the best

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Answer 10

Yes yes yes ... Do confront him n do it Now !!!!

The later u do it the worse it will get ...
Think of one thing ... if he leaves u after dat ... Wat have u got now ? Ask yrself ... i know being an indian u want him to be the ultimate guy fer u.

Also, If u luv him u've got to gather the nerve to question him ...

Because, U HAVE PROOF ....