Our 13 year old son is sporting a Dhoni style haircut which is looking quite untidy.We tried to persuade him into getting a regular haircut but he is not ready to do so.
Yesterday we got a complaint from his school about his haircut and asked us to get his haircut else they will have to take action.
My Husband is quite furious now and wants to take him to a barbershop and get his head shaved smooth to teach him a lesson so that he doesnt grow his hair so long again.
I am not sure whether we should take such an extreme step. what do you think?
2006-12-04 20:50:19 · 43 answers · asked by suma 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
We have tried all possible ways of convincing him...both carrot and stick...he doesnt seem to care.
2006-12-04 21:02:37 · update #1
LET YOUR SON GOES TO BARBERSHOP AND HAVE NICE CUT BEFORE HIS FATHER GO ALONG WITH HIM.
2006-12-07 22:33:47 · answer #1 · answered by RAMAN IOBIAN 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think your husband is the one with the problem. He is an abusive parent. Bad parenting skills, taking his frustrations out on his kid?? If people don't know how to love their children, then for God's sake why do they have them in the first place?? I get so upset when I hear of parents doing this kind of thing. Well .. we can't really blame your husband, in all likelihood he has learnt this behaviour from being mistreated hurt and disrespected by his own parents when he was a child. And so the sins of the fathers are passed on to the sons, and grandsons, again and again, generation after generation. I wish and hope your husband has the guts to look at his own issues and perhaps take some anger management counseling. It is definitely extreme for him to get furious over a hairstyle, and that tells me he has a lot of repressed anger and pain over something else altogether from his own childhood, that he's taking out on your son.
2006-12-07 03:48:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that he is trying to be an individual and not one of the crowd You should be happy that he can be such an individual . shaving his head will not cure the problem it will just give him more of an attitude . ask him if he can put his hair up or wash it and comb it back so that the school doesn't make you his parents do some thing drastic to his fine head of locks .
Contact the school and find out what he can do to be acceptable with his hair the way it is .
After all its just hair and his right to express him self as he deems fit
2006-12-04 22:18:49 · answer #3 · answered by slick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Taking extreme measures with teens is never the answer. By talking seriously (in a group - mom, dad and son) make him realize the gravity of the repercussion caused in school due to him having this length of hair. Why not get a very cool hair cut - something really close to his scalp like the military cut and show him that this short a hair cut also works well on young men and is very smart? Please don't do anything drastic or extreme. Children remember harsh measures for a very long time and sometimes they seem to hold it against parents even into their adulthood. No sensitive child, even though very naughty and rebellious will ever want to see his parents sad. Explain and talk to him as much as you can. Hope things work out. :-)
2006-12-04 21:02:38 · answer #4 · answered by happykat 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hey! He's just a kid. You got to make him feel matured even at this little age. Talk to him and make him feel that he is really good and say that you love him, more often. This is enough to keep him in control and he will be more understanding and will live a life of high dignity and self respect. It' all the way, how you shape him in this world. Let's imagine that you shave him, right now... That will only turn things wild. It's just like adding fuel to the dying flame. He's a small kid, sister! So talk with him, and make him feel that this is wrong. He will at first disobey, but when your maturity grows with handling kids, I promise that you can expect the same from your dear ones...
Treat the little ones that they are the very special people on earth because, they truly are!!!
2006-12-08 01:44:32 · answer #5 · answered by Naveen 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i cant believe you would take such action against your boy for having his own identity,if he is comfortable with his look then he has mastered something that many kids nowadays cant master,,,having a mind of his own.
Give him a break,tell him its cool but next time think before he does it again coz his school moan at you and his dad.
He's 13,give him a little leaveway.
The school have a criteria that they must follow including uniform,hair,etc so thats probably the reason they have come down on you but dont take it out on your boy.
If you shave your boys head(especially in this weather) then you are behaving in the manner you are trying to disapline you son for.
His hair will grow back so dont be too hard on him
2006-12-05 00:50:20 · answer #6 · answered by freerange00720002000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get him interested in some activity which would definitely require a change in hair style.
NCC, Scouts, some sports, a new hero to worship and imitate.
If that does not work, let the school take necessary action, provided its only to his hair.
You should not alienate him by attempting to change is hair style through threats or force.
Let him understand that in some areas of society he would have to toe the line.In the present case, his school
2006-12-05 00:37:30 · answer #7 · answered by joe m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No way....but u u want to loose ur son...yes u can.
He can defenetly keep in his mind and become rebal. he gets insulted if u do like so. U can never win his heart and he may run away from home. Donot be so emotional.
Better leave him the way he is. If u really like him. He would soon realize. Donot pour water on his wishes.
He is just a small kid. Go to his level. Donot expect him to grow to ur level right now. he is not matured. atleast u beheave matured.
Love ur child. Donot insult him in front of his friends. What u can do is motivate him.
2006-12-06 17:23:44 · answer #8 · answered by SureshkumarYVS from hyderabad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure why his school feels they have the right to say how he should have his hair.and i would be giving the school a call and ask them exactly that and what action they think they would be able to take if he did not get it cut? as long as your son is going to school, clean and with clean clothes i don't really think they can do much. but as far as shaving his head? no, i don't think that will be teaching him much of any thing. i think that your son has the right to express him self. as long as he is not hurting any one.be thankful that's the only thing he is doing.if he is a good kid and not into drugs and gangs count your blessings. leave his hair alone.
2006-12-04 22:05:19 · answer #9 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hi Mam,
No please do not take such a step.It will only Hurt him very badly(Ego) and at this age its turns worst.Because the age is such.Win the trust of one of his close friend and see if that friend can convenience him to do so.
Because school age is such that with Bald head if he goes to school and his class mates tease him,it will only create a grudge in his mind about his parents and the real problem will start then.
2006-12-04 21:14:56 · answer #10 · answered by netra k 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
no no no, he'll hate you. he'll look wierd and feel terrible and probably get picked on at school. tell him you thought about making him shave all his hair off, but decided against it because you rather him cut his hair in another style that he likes so he's able to express himself as well as stop getting complaints from the school. and why does the school have a problem with his hair? is it parochial or something? if it isn't private then i don't see how they can take action a hair style. good luck with yoru situation.
2006-12-04 21:02:56 · answer #11 · answered by ChicaLolita 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋