What are some good lies to tell your partner if you cheat?

Question

Ok, I asked this question before, but all I got was some moralist crap about not cheating and what a jerk I am. I don't want any advise from you spineless carebears. I want to hear from cheaters who know how to cheat with a poker face. It's not a question about good or bad, it's about HOW.

Answer 1

- Don't you realize how smart you are ?

Answer 2

I have never cheated on anyone or ever lied to a partner, but I can give you some basic tips. When lying, never lie until you need to. If you were out, don't say you were out with friends. Just say you were out, or say nothing. If she asks where, say something that does not require a lot of details or alibis. If you have to provide details, the fewer, the better. Details that put you in a somewhat bad light are better. For example, you might say that you were watching porn with your buddies. That is a more believable lie than saying you were helping nuns care for foster children.

Whatever you do, if you cheat, use condoms. ALWAYS. Make sure you are not cheating with total strangers. Even if you use condoms, make sure all of your partners have been tested for HIV and STD's. It is not fair to someone who trusts you to catch these because of your disrespect.

Last word of advice - if you later decide that you love the woman you are with and want to just be with her, never ever tell her what you did, no matter how guilty you feel.

Answer 3

If you are asking for instructions on how to cheat then you are just too dumb to cheat. I aint judging you, I have no reason to and I curse those two face christians and represed women who point fingers as if they are not human.
There is no plan, no one schedule an affair. Its after meeting someone else that one plans on the details into how to make the perfect secret affair.
free time, a place, untraceable calls, secret email account, a cheater will always find the way. Cheating doesnt come with a manual, its something you learn as life brings the oportunities to cheat and the aftermath is either very rewarding or your final doom

Good luck.

Answer 4

So most men are not "slick" enough to not eventually get caught, instead of waiting for the other shoe to drop and a really ugly scene, drop your girlfriend/wife whatever-be single and hump like a bunny. its fine to want to sleep around, but be the big man and level with the chick. Women who are cheated on are generally spiteful, hateful and often seek revenge(slashed tires,keyed cars, nasty blogs. Cheating on a women is pretty similar to sticking your hand in the garbage disposal while its running, you will get ****** up...eventually.

Answer 5

Lies? Why would you feel the need to lie? Just say nothing...the more you say, the more likely you are to step in it. Just keep your mouth closed and look incredulous...as if you don't have a clue what she's talking about! If it does come down to saying something, deny, deny, deny! "I don't have a clue what you're talking about!" Unless you're busted with a sheet in your hand in a photo or a submerged Willy, there's no way to actually BE busted, so there you have it. Think you can pull it off?

Answer 6

haha, ok well i cheated on my boyfriend before and heres what happened. at first i said absolutly nothing, i acted like nothing happened but eventually since i was in highschol and every body knows everybodys buisness people told my boyfriend that it happened. so then i said that the boy who i cheated on him with just came over to my house because he was upset about his breakup and i said nothing happened but i gav him a hug. my boyfriend believed me over other people and i eventually had to tell him that the boy i cheated with made it all up to get back at his ex.

so i would suggest owning up to something small like a kiss on the cheek or talking on the phone and she will think you are good for telling her the truth. (even though we know it isnt)

if you have any questions i might be better to give advice if i knew more details so you can send me a message and i'll be glad to get back with you;)

Answer 7

Deny everything. Never, ever admit anything. They got photos? Still deny it. That shred of doubt you plant in their mind will eat away at their suspicions until they believe you. If you really want to cheat and not worry about having to deny it drive them to cheat first. 89 years from now when you are on your death bed, deny it still. Never ever tell them the truth.

Answer 8

Then he will say the actuality. you're saying they are committed, they have been mutually for years. If he tells the actuality she ought to no longer sense stable, ought to even think of of leaving him yet she would be able to no longer if she fairly became into committed. she would be able to attempt to comprehend that it wasn't intentionally executed yet a mistake. If he relatively loves her then she could say it because of the fact then she ought to on no account sense the comparable for him however the sensation of have faith would be advance and could on no account enable such element happen lower back. If she knows him, loves him from the intensity of her coronary heart she would be able to forgive him, no longer because of the fact he advised the actuality yet because of the fact she knows and have have faith that he won't repeat it ever lower back. If she have been given to comprehend the actuality from somebody else then ninety 5% probability is there she would be able to go away him, yet while he at as quickly as says to her she ought to evaluate understanding each thing. :)

Answer 9

I cant believe you think that its not a matter of morals. I hope that your partner finds out and chops your dick off. Men like you really suck. And by the way the only one here who is spineless is you.

Answer 10

Spineless carebears? Haha. I like your choice of words there.... spineless, funny how it also seems to apply to you in your little pickle of a situation.

Stop being so ignorant. If you want real non-moral answers then....hmmm, BRIGHT IDEA.... don't ask!

Spineless...

Answer 11

If your partner finds out your cheated tell him you had know idea what you were doing you just woke up next to that person.