My mom is having an affair and keeps denying it?

Question

My mom is having an affair and It's been going on for about 4 years now. She's still doing all her responsibilities and still supporting us for what we're doing but I just can't stand it anymore. My dad knows about it and he doesn't wanna divorce her because he wants our family to be complete. I really feel bad when my aunts tell me that they would always see my mom and this jerk together. Some of my teammates would also see my mom out with this man and it hurts me a lot because I don't want my dad suffering like that. I feel like my mom doesn't care at all when people see her with this man. I tried to confront her like last week but I kinda had a hard time because tears fell on my cheeks already. It's a topic that I don't wanna bring up cuz its hard to talk about it with her. She keeps denying it even though I caught them many times already but they didn't see me. She's just a fuck3n liar and has been cheating on my dad and I can't stand it anymore. Please help me!

I love my mom and dad and I don't think I can live without the both of them. I don't really have the courage to talk about it with her. I can't do it. I'm not brave enough. I already talked to my dad about this and he said that let her do what she wants. I'm just worried that my mom might transfer all our wealth and lands into her name and nothing would be left for my dad. My dad is hanging on because of me and my siblings. He wants us to be complete and I know that its not easy for him to accept what's my mom doing. As for my mom, she's still nice and buys us what we want and would always support me when I have swim meets. Always there for me when I have problems. But what the hell is she doing to our family? Why is she doing to us? My dad does everything and is hella working hard for us. My dad is a good man and the best one. My mom actually has everything and what went wrong? Why is she cheating on us? I ****** hate it! I keep thinking about it and I want to be able to help.

Answer 1

the next time you catch them, let them know. I could see a woman cheating on a guy for four hours four weels or even four months but four years is unforgivable. it means she doesnt give a damn about your father. Your father sounds like his heart is in the rite place and that means hes more deserving for someone else. divorce happens and in this day and age is quite normal. Oh and if you cant stand it,before you go to bed tonight confront here, let all the tears and emotions come out. shes your mom shes not going to kill you. Get it off your chest now before you go through life widhing you had a chance to say something. also take it as an experince so that in future you dont cheat on your loved one.

Answer 2

I hope you have someone to talk to about this on a regular basis. If not, find someone you can confide in. You love both your parents and don't want to see either of them hurting. You can't understand any of this now. You will understand later, if you don't agree, ever. Remember, even though this has your mom confused, she loves you and is trying to cover all the bases. I'm sure she would prefer it wasn't happening and maybe, in time, she will be able to stop it, but, in the mean time, just keep your head on straight, talk about it with someone you trust, and pray that she will figure out that your dad has the right idea. Try to keep your focus on yourself. Get involved in school programs, sports, drama, academics...whatever is even slightly interesting. It will take your mind off things, at least for a while. Good for you for expressing your hurt and anger. Hang in there.

Answer 3

Your mom is making her choices, and in this case they are very selfish but, this is between her, your dad, and this other guy. I know you want to do something to help but you'll only wreck yourself emotionally, she isn't going to change. Be ther with your dad, that will be a complete family. A family is a group of people who love, care for, and respect each other. Your mom is not part of this right now anyway, even if your dad hasn't accepted this yet. It takes some longer then others.

Answer 4

Unfortunately there is nothing you can really do, especially since it is not really your business. I know you don't want to see your dad suffering but i think if he is still around there must be a reason for it.

If the whole situation is really bugging you then maybe you should confront your dad about it find out how HE really feels about the situation.

Hope i was some help.

Answer 5

i can personally relate to you becaue im sort of in the same spot. i think you have a lotta courage just to at least confront your mom, something i havent been able to do with my dad. i think that if you have any siblings, or close friends/family, they can go with you to confront your mom. you should just plain tell your mom was is it she denying it? if she keeps on doing it, maybe you should talk to a teacher/older person and as hard it sounds, talk to ur dad if you haven't already. if all else fails, mabye family counseling will be helpful. i really hope you get through this.

Answer 6

Your dad has his on secrets that you don't know about, but that have made the situation what it is - a compromise between the parties which acts as a form of atonement for the errors and omissions of either and each of them. You need to accept that there is an equilibrium here that is not your right or duty to disturb.

Learn from it - learn that adult life is not ever what you are lead to expect it either could be or should be.

Answer 7

I'm truly sorry you're going through this.

I know this might be easier said than done, but I would stop trying to talk to her about it. She obviously has ceased to care about anyone but herself. It's not your responsibility to get her to behave like an adult. It will only upset you further if you think that you can fix this if you try hard enough: You can't.

Please just take care of yourself first, above all. You're a kid and kids aren't supposed to solve adults' problems! Spend all the time you can with your dad. Let him know you love him. Spend time with friends and have FUN. Put your mom's ridiculous behavior out of your mind because there's nothing you can do about it. Free yourself from it.

Answer 8

Your parents are the only ones that can do anything about this and so long as your Dad is willing to put up with it your stuck until your old enough to leave the house. You could make a snide remark about it to her like, so it's perfectly OK for me or my husband to run around on the other when I get married or I thought you were supposed to raise your children to have morals or it's OK with you if Dad has an affair? But beware, she could slap you for it.

Answer 9

Although I dont condone what your mother is doing there are 2 sides to every story and you dont know what that is. For all you know your father could have been neglecting her needs for years til she couldnt stand it anymore.

You could just tell your father how you feel and that to you the family isnt complete anyway and if he divorced you would go live with him. I have a feeling theres more to this though then he is willing to say. Im thinking both your parents are lying.

Answer 10

Your anger over this is completely understandable. Dont let bitches tell you that you shouldnt be getting on your moms *** about who she sleeps with. Thats ridiculous.

Family counseling is probably the best thing you could do, especially for you and your dad. (your mom may jsut keep right on denying.) My friend went through this last year, and his dad was the same way.