Not really trying to prove a point here and honest answers would be appreciated. I do think some women like it, but I also see a growing distance from it, particularly from the younger women, say under 25. Maybe I've got too much Frank Sinatra and Humphrey Bogart in my blood but I think other men from this school of thought have noticed the same. Maybe it's a good thing the romancing is leaving and the newer approach is better.....you be the judge......both men and women responses are welcomed.
2006-12-04 16:57:16 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
As a male from this age group, I'd say that every girl wants romance, however they don't seem to expect it so much anymore. I hate to use the TV cliche, but I really think it (Real World, Spring Break, Sex and the City, Seduction Island or whatever it was called, etc.) as well as the internet has a lot to do with it. We as a society (America, as well as the global society) are becoming more instantly in contact with each other, yet increasingly isolated and indivdualistic all the time. To say romance is dying, may be a fact, but if it is, then it is because instant gratification is becoming the norm.
Romancing a woman in college is indeed a rarity it seems, where hookups and promiscuity seem to be taking the place where romance and dating were present...not to say they aren't still there, it's just that it seems like more and more people are hooking up rather than trying to find a mate and getting to know them, until they graduate from college.
I myself am an example of this, however my fiancee and I are one of those rare occasions that romance and love can blossom from a hookup (We've been dating 3+ years now). But like I said, I think we are a rarity, most people with long term relationships actually really get to know each other and date before they jump into a physical relationship. It goes back to the classic statement that men go out looking for sex and say I love you to get it, and women go out looking for love and have sex to get it.
I consider myself to be a romantic as well, and I definately agree that today in the younger generation, romance isn't expected, it's considered "cute" or corny but a romantic guy isn't taken seriously, unless that is what the woman is looking for. I've seen it happen many a time, the romantic guy is laughed off, or becomes the "guy friend." Most women 25 and under don't seem to be looking for romance. Is it a matter of maturity? I believe that has everything to do with it, men and women included. It seems that Generation Y as we're called, is not interested in taking the time to woo/be woo'ed, we want everything, faster, compressed, here and now. I believe it will change when we hit our late 20s early 30s (not that I'll be participating, but as an observer) women will begin to look for men who want to impress them, not with their money or car or job but with their attention to their target, and their appreciation and their romance. Men around that time also begin to realize (if they ever do) that it is time to stop thinking completely about myself, and it's time to learn about her, impress her, get to know what she loves, and appreciate that.
Perhaps I'm sentemental and a little tired, or sentemental because I'm tired, but I think it's all a manner of perspective. The girl looking for romance isn't always going to the bar friday and saturday nights, she's in watching a chick flick by herself or with a couple girlfriends, she's the girl you meet in the grocery store, in the gym, or at the mall. Romantics go out on occasion, they're just difficult to find amongst those who are looking for a fun time and forgettable night. The romantics are those who look for the unforgettable time, and the many fun nights to come. As you well know there are those of us who have the "Frank Sinatra and Humphrey Bogart" in our blood but there are many more guys who just want a quick beej and to not see the girl again (unless she's good at it). I don't think that's wrong, it's just that in the past women didn't give in so easily, and now it seems like many do.
2006-12-04 17:31:47 · answer #1 · answered by Chris L 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hope it's not. I'm trying to teach my husband that trick! A lot of women want romance, but now-a-days it's hard to find so you take what you can get. That's why so many woman love a man in uniform. It's the idea of what a guy like that stands for. Men in the military are held to certain standards, ex. well groomed, well mannered (mostly), nice body, and brave. When women think of a man in his Army green or a Airman in those blues... wow. It's the impression it makes. The ones right out of basic training all say things like, "Yes mamm" and offer to help with things. They open doors and represent the way men behaved many years ago. I'm not very old fashioned, but I think somewhere manners and romance got lost with technology. Not that I don't like technology. I love it!
2006-12-05 01:08:19 · answer #2 · answered by twogingerkisses 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm 27, and I know that many women still loooove a chivalrous man. My boy always opens the car door for me, and that little act makes me feel so special. Things like flowers, letters, an old-fashioned mix tape (smile), and things like that make me melt. And old-school masculine acts like ordering for me (if it's someone I'm dating seriously), walking in front of me going down the stairs and behind me going up them, opening doors, holding my hand or arm and leading me in a sweet way- those all rock. I respect a man tenfold if he practices what he preaches in the romance department. Keep it up, man! :)
2006-12-05 01:02:42 · answer #3 · answered by Jennifer W 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I sure hope not! I love all that romantic stuff; candles, rose petals, soft music, love notes, holding hands etc. I love when a man opens the car door for me or when we walk into a restaurant he orders for the both of us. It is rare to find now, but classy, romantic men still exist. Yay! :)
2006-12-05 01:03:13 · answer #4 · answered by bikinigirl41 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm 47. I WANT to be romanced, and find that guys are taking their cue from stupid women who want to pay their way, etc. The last guy I saw wanted to hang at his apartment, cuddling and watching movies. That's it. He didn't want to take me out anywhere! Anyway, he also told me to call him. I told him he should call me because I'm a lady. I never called him. He never called me. And I'm happy about it. :o)
I want a guy to take me out, wine and dine me. I want him to open doors and pull out chairs and treat me like a lady. Then I want a lingering kiss that stays on my lips when it's over when he walks me to my door. Is that really too much to ask??????
Best Wishes,
Sue ~ Who was apparently not made for the 21st century.
2006-12-05 01:08:38 · answer #5 · answered by newbiegranny 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋