My ex-boyfriend contacted me after almost 1 year, saying he was sorry for all the hurt he caused me and that he was going to AA meetings and getting the help he needed, and wanted to see how things could end up w/us, but says we should be friends first until we see each other and see what happens........sometimes he calls me almost every day, then i don't hear from him for weeks, and or if his "friend" Carolyn calls he hangs up w/me to talk w/her. I don't know what to think. We were together for 2 years, and i stood by him, when he lost his son (he was 7) and he cheated on me and lied, and had me almost give up my job to move w/him only to back out on me a week before we were to move, i had to ask my boss for my job back etc......Long story short..........is it worth giving someone a 2nd chance? or should I just ignor him?
2006-12-04 14:57:20 · 4 answers · asked by sunflwr037 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
no he met her when he crashed his car he said and was in the hospital, and he told me they had made out but choose to be friends, but he has told me he still finds her attractive! i just don't know if i should give someone a 2nd chance - i seem to always think he is lying and or playing me again.
2006-12-04 15:13:12 · update #1
First I would find out if he is seriously trying to get clean and sober and if he is then I would say yeah go for it but as soon as he starts doing the same old stuff like before then I would kick him to the curb and never talk to him again. Carolyn might be another gf but more then likely if he is in AA it might be another person from group who is helping and get help from you ex.
2006-12-04 15:05:50 · answer #1 · answered by montana_infantry_man 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To someone who is in AA, you will always be an outsider. They call non-AA, non-alcoholics "normies" or "earth people" and claim they cannot understand alcoholics.
Many members treat the meetings like singles bars or high school.
The literature says that a wife should expect to come in third place, after God, and after AA.
Chances are good that he's the same person you had an iffy relationship with, only sober.
2006-12-04 20:10:14 · answer #2 · answered by raysny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can really answer this question.
I think, if this was me, and if I still truly wanted to be his partner (not just to help him), I would wait. I would give him a year (I know that seems long, but there is a lot of healing) before getting back to him to see if he can maintain his sobriety and if he seems to have shed the awful habits of cheating and lying. Even if it seems OK, it is still such a gamble.
Also, remember that it is one of the steps of AA to apologize to those you have hurt in the past.
2006-12-04 15:09:16 · answer #3 · answered by Contessa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Plain and simply NO... do u want ur life destroyed again??
2006-12-04 15:00:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋