men- is this normal?

Question

i found porn magazines in my husbands shelves. (I was cleaning the house)

I'm a little outraged. Should I confront my husband or is this no big deal?

Answer 1

I wouldn't like the idea of my husband masturbating, but I've seen a couple of porn magazines in his bag.
Don't panic, sometimes men need quick releif. The more sex you give him, the less he'll use these magazines.
After all you should be happy that there are pictures of WOMEN in this magazines; you wouldn't want to find out that he gets excited from guys or animals or some other perversion.
You've got a normal man. Don't confront him; you'll just embarass him. If you REALLY want to let him know that you found these magazines, do it in a kind of funny sexy way. Something like, wear something sexy and offer him to try a real thing.
But again, best advice - just let it go.

Answer 2

I worked in a porn shop when I was in college getting my engineering masters degree, so I am a student of the male sexual mind a little more than most. I would stay on a point already mentioned a little, and ask what kind of porn magazine it was?

Here is why.

If it's a magazine like Penthouse, Playboy, Perfect 10, Rockstar, something along the lines of that, where basically all you have is nude women. Those magazines are generally considered Porn Mainstream, meaning thier pretty harmless, maybe your man likes a little more flesh than the average bikini mag offers like FHM, Stuff, or something like that. 90% roughly of guys that run out and physically buy a porn mag, grab something in this category.

Mags like these generally have some decent writing in thier articles and talk about issues that guys want to hear about, and while thier pornographic, thier pretty harmless and I wouldn't worry. I've read magazines like these, and just like the eye candy, but I have never masturbated to the pics or anything, and I know other guys who claim the same thing.

If however he is reading something like Hustler, which is a bit of a crossover mag with a reputation. Or if he is reading mags like Swank, Genesis, High Society, Velvet, Cheri, magazines that feature full on sex, and really don't have any non sex related articles worth a damn, then he's more fixated on it, and probably masturbating to them.

If he is reading a magazine that features a specific fetish, meaning a magazine that focuses on either sex or pictures of an exclusive area or act, like a large breast magazine or butts, or you get the idea, then he probably has a pretty solid history of looking at porn and using it as an aid, and you may have a hell of a time ridding him of it, and you may want to be careful approaching the situation based on how hardcore the stuff is.

I saw hundreds of guys go through the progression working at that store. The start with a Playboy or Penthouse, move to Hustler, then Cheri and by then thier probably watching movies of hardcore sex too, and then after a little time, they start to look for specific things that get them going, like a fetish magazine. It's not a perfect method, but it's common to progress that way.

No matter how far down the path he has gone, whether it is a problem or not, is strictly between you and your family, but to be honest if you have been married a while and this is the first you know of it, chances are it isn't very problematic. Good luck.

Answer 3

Ok you found porn magazines, in your husbands shelves, and you are outraged.......I think you are over reacting, what you need to do is just calm down, relax, breathe. What kind of porn was it, was it Playboy or some of the dirtier magazines? Cus if it was Playboy you are really over reacting. Also it could be a hint for a little spice to be added to your night life, do something different, wear something sexy at night for a change, but if you are going to confront your husband, don't just put him on the spot, don't yell at him, and don't make it look like he's a badguy, all in all it might just be something small. If I were you, I'd just try and spice up the night life just a little.

Answer 4

I'm 40 and I've been married for 14 years. Getting angry with him about it is the last you should do. You'll just be shooting yourself in your own foot, so to speak.

You'll probably get made at me for this, but you should take a close look at the girls in that magazine and work on being one of them for him. Treat him like a king and be his slut and he'll probably forget about the magazines since they would serve no purpose anymore.

If you can't do that, then maybe you could figure out something else that would work. In any case, don't treat this as finding incriminating evidence. That suggests that you are not on his side. This is an opportunity to learn more about him that you evidently didn't know. It's your decision.

Answer 5

This is no big deal most men and when I say most I mean like 90 -95% of men look at dirty magazines. Its mans natural urge to spread his seed. All men have this embeded into his brain and its not even something that most men are aware of but it has been like this since the dawn of time and it goes the same with every male creatue on this planet, except for animals dont look at magazines they acctually have sex with every other female they can get a hold of its called survival of the fittest every creature once to have his dna last through the ages so the spread our seed. We are just the only ones who can control our urges to do so.

Answer 6

I know you asked men, but I just gotta tell you...
It is as normal as a car having 4 wheels.

It's probably horrible finding out at this point when you guys are already married, and you would think he is supposed to drop stuff like that...
My mother and father have been married for 30 years, and he STILL is attracted by those things. He doesn't go buy a magazine, but when something like that comes up on TV, he'll watch it.
It's just their instinct. I think it has something to do with fantasies...
don't be afraid. It doesn't mean anything like he wants to cheat on you or wants other women...
That's just men. I found it hard to understand in the beginning too, but that's just how it is.

Answer 7

Most guys look at porn in some form or another. I would ask about it. but don't be so pissed off when you do. If you're sex life is good then there is nothing to worry about. Be thankful it's only mags, maybe some vid's. Atleast it's not someone else or a child/teen. Who knows, perhaps you just found the key to a better sex life. Try not to be too close minded about this. You get horney too, right?

Answer 8

Your husband looks at porn. Big deal. Most men do.

Answer 9

You should not. You rather this than him going to find women outside.We all have our own needs and private time, private space. If I were you I will look through the magazines and see if I could surprise him in bed with a little special feature for him.

Answer 10

I dont live with my partner but one day i came home to find naked women posters up in his room. I ripped them off the wall and scrunched them up in his face. And THEN i had a talk with him on how i was feeling. I told him the posters degraded me as a woman and that he should never do something like that again. To us it feels like we're not good enough for the men but to men its not like that and you have to remember that. To men looking and even masturbating to pictures of other women is their way of bringing excitement in their sex lives. If you truely dont like that he has these mags then tell him how you feel and what you want. Also ask him why he has the mags, you might be surprised that it will lead up to a deeper meaning. Dont go nuts at your husband it will only scare him and tell you what you want to hear... talk with him calmly.