My fiance and I have lived together for the past six months...our wedding is in seven months.
Lately I've been reading about the statistics on cohabitation and I fear that we are setting ourselves up for divorce.
Should I move out eventhough it would be a hassle just to move right back in with him in seven months?
2006-12-04 12:57:59 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I will tell you what i did. We absolutely lived together before we married. He slept away from home the night before the wedding and then we slept in a hotel after the wedding and off to our honeymoon. We got back tired and the wedding long behind us. My husband and I just celebrated 7 years marriage and 8 years as business partners.
I would advise against moving out, because it sounds like unnecessary work, stress and superstition. You know this man, you want to marry him even though you have lived with him for 6 months. You are good to go - take it as easy as you can through the hectic wedding season.
Peace!
2006-12-04 13:02:45 · answer #1 · answered by carole 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are getting along, I don't understand why you would move out for 7 months. You have already cohabited, so any statistics already apply to you. However, you cannot go by statistics. You have to examine your relationship and decide whether or not you think you and your fiance have a better than average chance of having a lasting marriage. One bit of advice -- keep dating each other after you are married. Don't take the other one for granted. Make each other feel like the most important person in the world. Then statistics won't apply to you.
2006-12-04 13:10:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anniesgran 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can't see how moving out for seven months will have any effect on a divorce in the future. If you don't get along or are not compatible moving out for a few months certainly isn't going to change that. I lived with my wife for 2 1/2 years before we got married 13 1/2 years ago and I don't see how being apart for a few months before the ceremony would have made a difference.
2006-12-04 13:11:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, it all depends on how you feel about this situation. There are statistics for everything nowadays; living with your fiance is giving you the opportunity to understand one another before marriage. You get to learn of each others tendencies and annoyancies. This can be a good and bad thing though. I can only give you advice, but it is solely up to you what you do and don't do. I would not move out, unless your current living condition is causing you and your fiance problems.
2006-12-04 13:05:39 · answer #4 · answered by fenix 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Statistics are just that: statistics. Your relationship is as strong as it will ever be. I don't really think that moving out will up the probability that your relationship will be any better. Personally, I think there are many benefits to living with someone before you marry them. My husband and I did and we have been happily married for going on 7 years.
The strength is not within the statistics that loom over every engaged couples head...it is within the strength of their relationships. If you love, trust, and respect one another already then I don't think that moving out is going to affect you in such a profound way that it will make your relationship bullet proof.
Just a thought!
2006-12-04 13:04:29 · answer #5 · answered by Jessica D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't believe everything you hear and read! If you already have your mindset that you're destined for failure, you'll surely fail!!! Instead, you should be reading about happy successful marriages and their secrets to longevity! Take some couples classes. Many larger churches have classes that couples can take together! If you go into this marriage with the total and complete commitment to success, you'll stand a lot better chance of living "happily ever after"! Good luck! (Oh, sorry, no, I wouldn't move out....just the horror stories that have you anxious!)
2006-12-04 13:03:07 · answer #6 · answered by ladyw900ldriver 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Any time you do something outside the will of God, there are going to be hassles. When you read those statistics on cohabitation, they're alarming because God isn't blessing that union. Cohabitation is a sin. Move out, confess your sin to God, and ask Him to bless your marriage.
Even though you do marry later, what you're doing now is a sin, and you need to ask God for forgiveness.
2006-12-04 13:03:30 · answer #7 · answered by ted.nardo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Correlation does not equal causation. Just because people live together doesn't mean they will divorce. There could have been many other factors involved. The top reasons people get divorced is due to arguments about money, sex, and child rearing. Get your game-plan on for how you will be handling those items and you'll be fine.
Also, there is no law that says you HAVE to get married.
Good luck!
2006-12-04 13:02:19 · answer #8 · answered by dancing_in_the_hail 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
God loves you and desires to speak to you. Trust me from experience, unconfessed sin will put a wedge between you and God and you can't repent of fornication and then keep doing for months at a time. However, you can always repent and come back even if you do get married without any changes. Don't hold back from God, it's not worth it.
2006-12-04 13:06:41 · answer #9 · answered by cropdownunder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be definitely worth it. Once you move out, you could learn to "ddate" eachother and do things together from the perspective of people who do not live together.
Can you stay with your parents? Or is there some other place where you could stay real cheap?
2006-12-04 13:00:54 · answer #10 · answered by Mr Ed 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋