Boyfriend Canceled Last Minute...Should I be upset?

Question

I made dinner for my boyfriend because I thought he was coming over to watch a movie. He never called that day to speak with me or to cancel. He then sent me a AIM message and we chatted for a little bit and he said he had to go work on his paper. I assumed we were still getting together as planned so I called him. He said that he could not tonight because he had to write a research paper. I asked why did he not tell me earlier as I had other things I could have done and was waiting for him. He then sent me a text message later saying that I was right and he was wrong for not keeping his plans with me and asked if I could forgive him (I did not respond) Everything seemed to be going very well between us but now I don't know. He says that he was busy the whole and he even said he went to church...but did not invite me? What do you think?

Thanks guys!

Answer 1

I think you should just get over it a little bit and cut the boy some slack.

Answer 2

Sounds like a pretty inconsiderate move on his part. He totally should have given you a better heads up or worked his plans around you. And he really didnt handle the apology well either if you ask me, text messages and AIM arent the way to deal with problems, everything should be said face to face or atleast over the phone. Then again,you need to take into hand how long you've been dating.. if its a fairly new relationship, i'd say wait for a better apology and then let it go.. If you've been dating for a longer time, there must be a little more consideration to the problem, and maybe you should consider telling him that your really upset about the whole thing. You also need to think about how many times this has happened, if he does this all the time, it cant be good. But if he hasn't, maybe he's just messed up and needs to be told how you feel about him treating a situation like that. Good luck with that my dear, most of us ladies can sympathize with you! We've all been there!

Answer 3

If this is the first time he's "stood you up" then consider forgiving. You let him know it upset you and that you didn't appreciate waiting on him when you could've done something else had you known he wasn't going to show.

You say he apologized, so accept it and go from there. If issues continue to come up, then there may be a problem. Don't blow this isolatd incident out of proportion, even though he was in the wrong for not cancelling with you.

Answer 4

I think that he did mess up...but he apologized for it. If you want to be mad at him, then go ahead and avoid him for the rest of the evening, but don't carry it out for a whole week. Understand that he had a paper to do. So what he didn't invite you to church with him. Did you really wanna go anyways? Or is that just the icing on the cake so you can be mad at him longer? People sometimes need their space in a relationship. I agree he should have told you that he wasn't coming. He may have forgotten, but either way, he apologized. Take a day if you need to, to be mad, tell him don't let it happen again and move on.

Answer 5

You may want to let this one go. It appears to me that the research paper should have been a predictable reason for him to not make it. Chances are he had something (or someone) else more appealing come up and the paper was the best excuse he could come up with. Don't allow yourself to get caught in a pattern of being betrayal and forgiveness. Take it from someone who spent too many years doing this. It doesn't work.

Answer 6

He didn't call to cancel...yes that's rude but he did apologize. If you make plans with your boyfriend in the future maybe you should confirm that day and have something else planned just in case it doesn't work out with him then you won't feel disappointed. Maybe your boyfriend didn't invite you to church because he was busy running errands and didn't think about it. Let your boyfriend know you enjoy spending time with him even if it's running errands and maybe he'll invite you next time. I think you have expectations of how he should be towards you but you have to let him know....most guys don't think about stuff like that...you have to be up front.

Answer 7

At least he apologized. As for him not inviting you to church, get over it. A relationship with God does not depend upon asking another person to join you. Besides if you are boyfriend and girlfriend then where is the trust? He probably wanted some quality time with the Lord. You can not concentrate on worship with a clingy person there interrupting your worship time. You seem to be a little needy and co-dependant. Perhaps he wanted to consult with the Lord to see if you are the one for him.

Answer 8

Accept his apology. This guy does seem like a nice guy and it may have genuinely slipped his mind.

Make sure he knows however that it did make you upset and that in future you would appreciate even a phone call from him to cancel.

To make a relationship work sometimes we cant let ourselves sweat the small stuff.

If this is the worst thing hes done, then girl you definitley have a keeper! hang on to him!

Answer 9

You can be upset that your plans were ruined, but find other plans and forgive him. Move past these little things, theyre not worth the energy and life's too short! Make other plans for later, and make them super-special to make up for today.

Answer 10

If he has never lied to you believe him and just ask if he still likes you. He might just be really busy and not have been thinking from all the stress. The same thing happened with me and my girlfriend before and it all worked out after she just talked to me.