According to the bible, How far can a premarital couple go, as far as sex is concerned?

Question

I am a 26 year old new convernt, I'm looking for a wife and this is all new to me and I need help in this area.
Can we kiss?- "But I say unto you that who so ever looks upon a women with lust in his heart has commited adultry already".
If Im kissing someone then I have lust in my heart. How can I marry someone without even kissing them?
Or Is it only a sin if we have sex?
What about touching? How much?
Please help me.
Any scripture would help. whats the def of fornication/adultery?
Thank you all for your help.

Answer 1

If you cross over into touching, you've crossed the line.

But, don't throw the baby out with the bath water, kissing is fine, as long as it doesn't lead you progressively into other areas.

Definitions:

Fornication: voluntary sexual intercourse between two unmarried persons or two persons not married to each other.

Adultery: voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than his or her lawful spouse.

Lust: intense sexual desire or appetite; or uncontrolled or illicit sexual desire or appetite; lecherousness.

Answer 2

Actually, kissing doesn't HAVE to be lustful, but it could be. Jesus kissed Mary Magdalene. You kiss your mother, right? Even french kissing can be pleasurable and affectionate and still not be lustful.

Any kind of activity with someone who is not your spouse which encourages you to indulge in lustful desires and thoughts (which COULD be kissing) is what I would consider sexual immorality. And sexual immorality is what is wrong, not just sexual contact.

It's important that you recognize that even if an activity isn't lustful for you, the other person might be having lustful thoughts. This is something that I learned over the past couple of years getting serious with some girls. I enjoy kissing (of course) for itself and it doesn't necessarily lead to lustful thoughts for me. I assumed the girls were the same way. Mistake. I only found out later that it was sometimes very difficult for them to stop. I had no problem... well some problem, but I was able to stop. But the girls felt that they were too close to sinning. So it's better to hold off on the passion until you are married.

I'll defer to the other definitions of adultery / fornication.

By the way, there are a LOOOT of couples whose first kiss is the one that marks the beginning of their marriage. Kind of a romantic idea, huh? It's not for me (well maybe), but I can see the alure.

Attend a song of solomon conference or buy the DVDs/CDs. It's precisely what you are looking for.

http://www.songofsolomon.com/

Answer 3

Well, until you're married to a woman, technically you should consider her your sister. Like..Jesus had hormones, he lived in a human body, so He had the same functions that all men do today. If He didn't, then He wouldn't have been human, and the whole point of becoming and living as a perfect human, and dying for our sins would be void. So, it's agreeable that he had hormones, and testosterone, and the same drives that any man has, which means, thoughts probably entered his head like, "Wow, that girl is hot." Then, He would choose whether to act on those thoughts. He could either pursue the thought, at which point He would have entered sin, because it would be lustful, or He could dismiss the thought. He always did the latter. For you, it's hard, but I think you can kiss without it being lustful. I mean..once it goes into making out and anything past that, that's just for sexual stimulation, which there is no point for unless you have sex, which you shouldnt' until you're married. But I say, kissing is fine. Just..nothing past that. It's tough, I know. Lol.

Answer 4

I am 26 and I just got married a few months ago. One man to another this is definitely a struggle for many Christians. I would say that the most important thing you could do is walk in an accountability relationship with another Christian man you trust. It is important that whether you feel convicted about kissing or not you have someone that you trust to walk with you through the incredible journey of dating and courtship. I recommend you read the books I Kissed Dating Goodbye and Every Single Mans Battle. God bless you and feel free to e-mail me if you need more encouragement.

Answer 5

I will try my best to be polite and respectful in answering your question. I understand that you are concerned about the horrifying possibility of, by accident, experiencing a little tiny bit of sexual excitement. If that happens, you fear that you might face eternal damnation in hell.
One thing is for sure: if you come to the point of observing any erectile function, when caressing your girlfriend, you are condemned forever. Eternity in the fires of hell. No way out!
The Bible does not allow any kind of sexual activity by the young , health and strong.
If you touch your girlfriend's ear, there is no problem. If you touch her breasts or legs, etc, your life will be cursed forever.
Sex was created by God but he will be enraged if you experience it.
The scriptures have nothing good to say about sex.

Answer 6

Fornication---sex with a partner you do not love.
Adultery---sex with someone apart from your partner if you are already married.

You are not in violation of anything, however I'd make sure you'd know each other a little bit more before you kiss, and a lot lot more before you Chinkle. Girls don't like it when you come onto them that quickly. They usually prefer slow and steady relationships....some exceptions.

Answer 7

Well, I dont exactly have a definetion but form my point of understanding it means that u can kiss and stuff but u are supposed to wait till u are married to have "it".

Answer 8

You cannot even see the woman until you are at the alter. Not even a picture. Nothing will be done until the I do's are complete.

Answer 9

why would anyone think kissing is a sin?

Answer 10

You should not put yourself or your partner in a position that is tempting and could lead to sin.

Cheers!