He is the perfact package 24 a successful medical professional, Opening his own practice. Nice car, nice house we have fun together and have great conversation, we can talk forever... He is not hot but not ugly and you can always get past looks anyway.
He really likes me too, from what he has told me. The thing is that I really tink he is gay but I don't even think HE knows it. All of my girlfriends think so too. There isn't any chemestry between us either, but he keeps pursuing a relationship with me and I am just not feelin it at all.
My question is how do I let him down gently? He is a wonderfully nice guy but obviously not the guy for me. I still would like to be friends with him cuz he is fun to be around i just can't see myself dating him. PLZ help me.
Thanks :)
2006-12-04 09:39:08 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Let me get this straight. You think that *he* is gay because *you* are not attracted to *him*. Maybe the gayness is a little closer to home.
2006-12-04 09:41:18 · answer #1 · answered by Otis F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Effeminate does not mean he is gay, just like super macho doesn't mean he's not gay. Sometimes you have to watch out for guys that act super macho because they are trying to cover up being gay. An effeminate man could just be comfortable in who he is.
Of course, this doesn't mean you have to like him. Just remember, if you don't like someone in a romantic way, you are doing them a favor by telling them. That means they can turn around and mentally say "next!" and be done with you. Just be nice and honest when you tell him, but don't accuse him of being gay, because you may look like an idiot if it isn't true.
2006-12-04 09:46:24 · answer #2 · answered by griffinpilot1965 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let's not focus on the gay or not gay aspect, because he will figure that out for himself eventually.
If you don't feel that way about him, simply tell him that he is a great friend and you don't want to loose that, but you just don't feel the "spark" of a romance.
Honesty is the best policy.
2006-12-04 09:41:54 · answer #3 · answered by Dolphin lover 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is not gay , well he can't be if he likes you. If you only like him as a friend you need to tell him gently try writing him a letter, tell him you love him as a friend and hope you'll always be good friends but you just don't like him in that way.
2006-12-04 09:46:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you just need to be straight with him. Let him know that you really value his friendship and you don't want to loose what you have now, but that you really don't see him in that way. I would bring up the gay thing. If it is true let him figure that out in his own time.
2006-12-04 09:43:38 · answer #5 · answered by tinytinkbell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
.....well he might be Metro...metro means seems gay but isn't. But if there is no chemistry, then take him to a little place and talk about what he feels. Then explain to him that you see each other as great friends and do not want to ruin the friendship u guys have.
2006-12-04 09:43:05 · answer #6 · answered by Victoria B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is gay that's not for you and your friends to decide, its for him to figure out for himself. If you don't have chemistry with him you don't have chemistry with him. Tell him you just want to be friends. Better now before he starts having serious feelings for you. If he's a good guy he'll stick around and be your friend. If not then he's not worth it anyway.
2006-12-04 09:44:54 · answer #7 · answered by *Cara* 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ah if you get the vibe then he probably is:( if its that strong! i guess you can only put things off for so long so my advise is come out and tell him that you are flattered but you don't think it would work out as more then friends but would love to continue being friends and see if it does develop to be more. or at lest that's what i would say:)
good luck on this one, because it would suck to have him not be gay and have him be the one that got away:)
2006-12-04 09:44:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For so many reasons, you need to not date him. From experience, if a man sends you any kind of a decent flower arrangement(like with Birds of Paradise in it), he's gay. If he loves Cher or Barbara, don't date him. If he owns and uses a facial moisterizer, don't date him. When he gets upset, if he puts his hands on his hips, don't date him. On and on.
2006-12-04 09:44:21 · answer #9 · answered by donewiththismess 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just keep using the term friend. I am so glad "I have you as a friend" You are "a good friend." Friend this friend that. I went out with a girl three times and I used the term friend only once, and that was it. She never called me again.
2006-12-04 10:08:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell him that u really like him but u arent sure if u want a relationship with him. it might help if u gently kiss him 2, see f there r sparks and if there isnt then fine if there is then good.
2006-12-04 09:41:46 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋