A lady goes to the doctor to see about getting a facelift. "Well," says the doctor, "I can do the facelift, and then you'll have to come back in six months for a follow-up."
"Oh, no." the woman replies. "I want it all done in one shot. I don't wan to have to come back."
The doctor thinks for a second, then offers, "There is a new procedure where we put a screw in the top of your head. Then anytime you see wrinkles appearing, you just give it a little turn, which pulls the skin up, and they disappear."
"That's what I want!" exclaims the lady. "Let's do that."
Six months later the lady charges into the doctor's office. "Well, how's the procedure holding up?" the doctor asks.
"Terrible!" the lady bellows. "It's the worst mistake I've ever made."
"What's wrong?" asks the doctor.
"Just look at these bags under my eyes!" she hollers.
"Lady," the doctor retorts, "those aren't bags, those are your breasts. And if you don't leave that screw alone, you're going to have a beard!"
2006-12-04 08:59:48 · 33 answers · asked by ploppy pants 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Too funny!
I've got one:
A man who was about 700 pounds overweight went on a crash diet and was down to a healthy weight.
The problem was that he had folds and folds of extra skin. He calls a plastic surgeon to take care of the problem but admits to the doctor, "I'm too embarrassed to walk out in public with all these folds of skin hanging off of me! I can't even walk into your clinic, it's too embarrassing!"
With some quick thinking, the doctor tells him, "What you do is pull all your folds of skin up and pile them on your head and hide it under a large hat."
The guy does this and walks into the clinic and checks in at the receptionist. The receptionist checks him in and asks, "If you don't mind my asking, what is that hole in your forehead?"
"My belly-button," he replies. "How do you like my tie?"
2006-12-04 09:17:11 · answer #1 · answered by thezaylady 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
10/10
2006-12-04 09:13:40 · answer #2 · answered by Newest Cullen member 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
7/10
2006-12-04 09:02:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thought it was pretty funny...on a scale of 1-10 I'd give it about an 8
2006-12-04 09:02:21 · answer #4 · answered by ncgville 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
6 out of 10. Long jokes have to be hilarious to get a high mark - and this didn't quite cut the mustard.
2006-12-04 09:03:07 · answer #5 · answered by mark 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha i give it a 8 out of 10
2006-12-04 09:05:33 · answer #6 · answered by GreenGurl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ill give it 7 out of 10
2006-12-04 09:02:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
10/10 another brilliant 1
2006-12-04 09:07:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NIce, I'd give it a 7.5 or 8 out of 10.
2006-12-04 09:07:24 · answer #9 · answered by Inferno13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
10 out of 10
very funny
unexpected punch line
2006-12-04 09:29:22 · answer #10 · answered by rachel d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋