A local preacher was dissatisfied with the small amount in the collection plates each Sunday.
Someone suggested to him that perhaps he might be able to hypnotize the congregation into giving more. "And just how would I go about doing that?" he asked.
"It is very simple. First you turn up the air conditioner so that the auditorium is warmer than usual. Then you preach in a monotone.
Meanwhile, you dangle a watch on a chain and swing it in a slow arc above the lectern and suggest they put 20 dollars in the collection plate."
So the very next Sunday, the reverend did as suggested, and lo and behold the plates were full of 20 dollar bills. Now, the preacher did not want to take advantage of this technique each and every Sunday.
So therefore, he waited for a couple of weeks and then tried his mass hypnosis again. Just as the last of the congregation was becoming mesmerized, the chain on the watch broke and the watch hit the lectern with a loud thud and springs and parts flew everywhere.
"Crap!" exclaimed the pastor.
It took them a week to clean up the church.
2006-12-04 08:35:03 · 17 answers · asked by ploppy pants 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
have you got one i have heard before thats another cracker
2006-12-04 09:49:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The preacher said to his congregation "For weeks now I have being trying to reach out to the poor of the parish and judging by todays collection I have succeeded".
2006-12-04 08:42:27 · answer #2 · answered by tucksie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Another brilliant 1 pmsl 10/10
2006-12-04 08:49:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny
2006-12-04 08:39:07 · answer #4 · answered by BUPPY'S MEME 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice! A #2 joke.
2006-12-04 08:37:25 · answer #5 · answered by Voni 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually kind of amusing, though it'd take a while to get to the punchline if you were saying it out loud.
2006-12-04 08:37:42 · answer #6 · answered by Eden 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, that was very funny. I have to clean my office now.
2006-12-04 08:37:40 · answer #7 · answered by brodie917 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's pretty funny. Nice one.
2006-12-04 08:38:11 · answer #8 · answered by Inferno13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's funny!
2006-12-04 08:44:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i just got me socks back on amd now iv'e laughed em off again.....
2006-12-04 08:37:27 · answer #10 · answered by chris w. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋