I am 28 and I have 3 daughters 6,4, and 2. I am pregnant with my 4th child. I work full time and have a BA in Political Science. I would like to work on my Masters this year which I think is possible considering I got my BA while being a stay at home mom of 2. My dilemma: I am not sure that I want a 4th child.. or shall I say that I am very scared. I love my kids very much but I feel as if I would be cheating them out of what they would have if it was just the 3 of them. I try to givem my children what I can within reason and tradition and time is more important to me than materialistic things because my parents were well off but spent little time with me prior to them being murdered when I was 9. My boyfriend who is the father of all of my children has asked me to marry him but I am not sure he means it. We live together and as I stated before we both work full time and he is working on his degree. I am a week away from opening my own business and it just did not seem timely. Help!
2006-12-04 07:56:23 · 11 answers · asked by Sexy PR Mom 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
This will be my 4th c section and the dr said I cannot have anymore children.
2006-12-04 08:03:06 · update #1
I'm also 28 and I have 4 kids plus one in utero. I have a 7yob, 6yog, 3yob, 2yob, and 18 wk in utero. I'm also a student midwife and I homeschool my children. As I'm sure you know already kids come one at a time (unless you have twins) and you are overwhelmed at first and it takes adjustment but you adjust and then you can't imagine life w/o that child. So relax and hang in there. I'm sure everything will work out just fine. They are only young once so enjoy them now while you can. You are blessed to have 4 children and someday when they leave the nest you will realize that. I know many women who wish they could go back and have more or just enjoy the ones they had. Congratulations on the new little life growing inside of you!
2006-12-06 08:25:29 · answer #1 · answered by Tanya C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's a little late to backtrack now. By all means, have the baby ... you might end up with a little boy. You weren't the first to have 4 kids. Many parents had 12 and managed just fine. You'll see, your girls are going to help you, even if they are yet of tender age. Don't worry, it will all work out.
Besides, what's the alternative? Abortion? No! don't do it ... If you do, you'll regret it forever. After the baby is born, if you REALLY can't manage with the addition, you can decide to give it up for adoption. My guess is that you will not even think about it. You'll be extremely happy with your new baby. Congratulations and good luck to you.
2006-12-04 09:01:15 · answer #2 · answered by maryc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So, What is your question? Do you feel like you have a choice in this? WOW! I cant believe some people. You are pregnant with YOUR child and already have 3, Your boyfriend is the father of all 4 and has asked you to marry him and you doubt his intent? WOW Sounds like you need some help! He sounds pretty committed if you ask me. So your own desires and career being more important than your own baby who is already in existance is a question to you? People like you shouldnt have any children. You may love them, but come on, get your priorities straight!
2006-12-04 08:52:26 · answer #3 · answered by jh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God wants you to have a fourth child for a reason.. The life has already been created and thus should not be ended. Please understand that I would never judge a person if they terminated a pregnancy....it would be their choice. I think you sound very intelligent and you sound like a wonderful mom...back to the same therory...you have been chosen AGAIN to be a mom. It will be fine. Do you love your boyfriend? If so, then marry him if you choose to. You are giving your children the best gift that can possibly be given - you and your unconditional love. Good luck to you...you can do it!
2006-12-04 08:07:51 · answer #4 · answered by suzycrmchz 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know the feeling I have three simialr age to yours and I would be so terrified if I found out I was pregnant!! I think you just have the feeling of being over whelmed right now, think back to when you got pregnant with you r secong, remember you thought you would never be able to love the child liket he first one right? and you could, then the third one came along and it was overwhelming but you made it through at this point what is one more. Best of Luck
2006-12-04 08:03:28 · answer #5 · answered by Jody 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah that can be hard. I say go for it. Like you said you already have 3 little ones. Could you imagine life with out them? You will say the same about the new baby. Everything all works out it always does. I reccomend getting your tubes tied after this one 4 is probley enough! Thats just what I think tho. Good luck and congrats!
2006-12-04 08:00:08 · answer #6 · answered by BOOTS! 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok breathe, calm down and relax, now as far as your boyfriend asking u to marry him, he probably means it I mean you have four of his kids so obviously he loves you, and if you can make it with two kids and get a BA I think you'll be fine with four, and if not if you have extra cash or your boyfriend will help hire a babysitter to just watch them a few hours every day it wont hurt so just relax and take some time to think things over.
2006-12-04 08:01:17 · answer #7 · answered by sapphireblue327 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe everything happens for a reason but the only way your gonna be happy is to listen to your heart.I have a 2 yr old son and i was trying to get pregnant and recently found out that i couldnt have any more kids
2006-12-04 08:01:45 · answer #8 · answered by kimberly s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with taking a deep breath and then take another. Things will work out. The good lord has blessed you with another child, a strong man to help carry you through, and I believe that he feels that you can do this. He never gives us more than we can handle. Believe me when I say that you can do it you just need to believe in yourself.
2006-12-04 10:35:02 · answer #9 · answered by a1cat.rm 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you are already pregnant just have the child and raise it, no need to murder an innocent baby just because you don't want it. If you didn't want to have this child why didn't you use condomns? Nothing else I can really say but you can take online classes and still take care of your kids at home.
2006-12-04 08:00:19 · answer #10 · answered by Hello 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋