"Grief is selfish" Agree or disagree? Why?

Question

Mary Elizebeth Branddon was the author of the afore mentioned quote. I was reading a book this morning and came across it...curious as to how others here view grief..thanks for answering.

the book is actually called "Believing in Ourselves" It isn't "Christian" themed at all.

Answer 1

grief is a natural feeling enen Jesus himself weeped but over doing it where you allow your situatons to dictate your actions instead of moving by faith is selfish and the work of the flesh we are to die daily to our flesh so our spirit may live

Answer 2

There are so many faces of grief, for all different relationships. I think for some grief is an obligation - what would their loved one or people think, if they were not sad about someone's death? I think for some it is a real tragedy - if you are left with nothing and kids to feed it can be crippling. It can be draining and exhausting - and now that you mention it, I can see how it could be selfish, certainly self indulgent at times.

Honestly, grief is one of those negative emotions that can consume us and put us into our own little hell on Earth (for eternity, if we are not careful). This is one reason why religions want us to understand that the person is not destroyed, just not right here with you anymore - because religion's job to help you be a happy, healthy, productive human being. The job of Religion is to uplift and help you find a path to happiness and a successful stay, here on earth.

Peace!

Answer 3

I'm not familiar with the book, so I can only analyze the statement as stated.

As a rule, grief is not selfish. Assuming this grief is the result of loss of a loved one, for instance. Grief over a hangnail would be - not selfish - but stupid.

There is a period of time after which it becomes self-indulgent. What that time frame is cannot be quantified clearly.

I think it would only be selfish if the griever were to ignore everyone but themselves after a "reasonable" period of time had passed.

I suppose this is some type of christian saying? That you shouldn't grieve because the dead person is with god now, or something like that? If that's the case, then it's a load of crap.

Answer 4

Is there more to the quote? I don't see how grief can be selfish. It's a necessary part of the healing process for humans (and many animals). How can you move into the future if you haven't made peace with the past, often through grieving for what was lost? That just doesn't make any sense.

Blessed be!
)O(

Answer 5

Come on people! Grief is very personal so of course it's selfish! But it is natural and completely acceptable. It's critical to coping with loss. And even though it is selfish in nature it can bring people together. People care for grieving people. Grieving can really show who your real friends are.

Answer 6

NO, Grief is a normal and natural process that all humans must work through. It's as selfish as breathing.

Answer 7

Spring and Fall: To a Young Child

MARGARET, are you grieving
Over Goldengrove unleaving?
Leaves, like the things of man, you
With your fresh thoughts care for, can you?
Ah! as the heart grows older
It will come to such sights colder
By and by, nor spare a sigh
Though worlds of wanwood leafmeal lie.
And yet you will weep and know why.
Now no matter, child, the name:
Sorrow's springs are the same.
Nor mouth had, no nor mind, expressed
What heart heard of, ghost guessed:
It is the blight man was born for,
It is Margaret you mourn for.

Gerard Manley Hopkins

Answer 8

Grief is a normal part of dealing with lose. Holding on to grief for too long isn't selfish, but it is unhealthy.

Answer 9

Grief is not selfish. It is a much needed "stage" one must go through when a major loss is suffered. I would tell this person that one who hasn't grieved, hasn't lived! (then I would junk that book).....

Answer 10

Disagree totally We have to go through periods of grief sometimes so we can heal and get on with our lives