Sex with me n marrying somebody else..help me?????

Question

I am in deep love with someone. We were into deep relationship with each other. We had F*** lots of time and we crossed all limits of intimate Sex.

This girl has diched me. We had a commitments for marriage but now everything seems to be ruined. She didnt tell me about anything and told me that she is talking to her parents. One day i came to know that she is going to marry some other guy. I was shocked.
Sometimes I feel so frustated to commit suicide.
She met me and told me that our relationship was just an infatuation. I asked her about the relation we had..sexual relations. She ignored those and told me that common its not abig deal.

I am very panicky now. I feel to tell her "to be Husband" everything so that atleast the life of that guy is saved. I know she may ruin his life anytime.

Answer 1

Move on. Its not your job to save her future husband. For all you know, he is cheating on her already. Move on and get a better woman for you.

Answer 2

You're in a terrible situation, and don't think I'm underestimating that. But everybody gets their heart broken at some stage, and much as it feels like you can't go on, do not consider suicide. Time is a healer, you'll feel much better than you do now in a matter of months.

It must hurt you that she didn't take your intimacy to be deeper than just sex, but many people share that frame of mind. For a lot of people sex is just physical, just something to do, and clearly this woman is one of those people.

You need to move on an leave this behind. Once you have accepted that it is over between the two of you and move on you will feel a huge feeling of relief. I know you love her, but you can put that behind you if you focus on other things and on the future. Do not tell her future husband, that would be dwelling and undignified. There are other women out there who you will love, and you're much better off without someone like that.

Answer 3

I know you are hurt but that's life. You must accept her decision and move on. I admit that wat she has done is wrong but prove urself to be a better human being than her and let her go and don't tell her husband to be anything. What happens is btwn her and you. Left it to her whether she will tell her husband to be abt it r nt. Well abt u, she doesn't deserve it so never think of suicide. There are much better waiting for you. Whatever happens is for the best. At least she didn't marry you and sleep with someone else.

Answer 4

It's obvious that you invested yourself emotionally in a relationship with a game-playing, cold-fish. It seems that your ex-lover is void of altruism. In other words, she's a budding sociopath.

The good news is, you are capable of deep emotional committment. You actually FEEL & are capable of expressing your emotions. In other words, you're normal.

Yes it hurts to be disrespected and mistreated by another human being. Especially, someone you've been physically intimate with. Your ex-lover was not deserving of the "gift" you gave.

These individuals tend to use/abuse others as a means of getting their needs met. They also tend to get alot of attention from others. Now here's where irony & poetic justice come in. Behaviour garners reputation. BAD BEHAVIOUR = BAD REPUTATION.

Take the high road on this one. Your ex-lover has obviously picked the lower, muddier path. GOOD BEHAVIOUR = GOOD REPUTATION.

Her well will run dry. If she keeps going with this kind of behaviour, her future will be bleak and miserable. Trust me on this one.

I could expand indefinitely on your ex-lover's callous behaviour and a little thing called karma but I think you get the picture. She is definitely not worth any further efforts from me or you.

Flip the negative stuff & examine the other side. Believe it or not, this relationship breakup CAN be a valuable learning experience for you. Recognise the fact that there are certain types of individuals who use/abuse others & learn to identify these traits so you can avoid these toxic relationships.

You can learn positive life skills from negative situations, if you chose to. Define yourself on your terms. Don't define yourself based on the words and actions of others.

On a final note. I want you to email me so we can make a contract, which will include your promise to NOT hurt yourself. In addition, I want you to promise me that you will seek professional help about your suicidal thoughts.

Take care and be kind to yourself. I wish you enough.

Katz

Answer 5

Tell her husband if you want to because he have the right to know, but don't do it because you want her back, you won't get her back. I think it's better if you just go on with your life and be at peace. What will be, will be and at this moment you know you’re not meant to be. Be glad it happened now and not another year down the drain. It will take time, but you'll heal. I know the feeling of loosing someone you care about, but remember it's not worth it if they don't love you.

Answer 6

Stop and think.
It is YOU who was serious. She was casual, had a great time with you and she did what she felt was right. Nothing wrong with that.

By taking the action you describe, you are being vindictive. Not called for. Just chalk it up for experience. You had great time with her..... you will find another one just like that. Next time don't be so serious. Learn from this experience and get on with your life. She has. Why don't you?

Answer 7

That's really messed up. If I were that guy, I'd want to know, so I agree about letting him know. You can find someone else that you are compatible with, and you will again have great physical connections, don't worry! She's not worth losing your life over.

Answer 8

Do yourself a BIG favor. Do not tell her to be husband anything.
Move on.
She was honest with you. It was infatuation for her. This is a term for enjoying someone but now you enjoy someone else more.
Find someone who is right for you. Use this as one more learning experience in life.

Answer 9

I'm sorry but it seems to me that this woman is fullfilling HER needs.. period! She didn't take your feelings in consideration at all.

Do you really want a woman who is so selfish?

I was married to a man for a very, very long time who was as selfish as she is. It wasn't a walk in the park either. : (

I wish you all the luck. Think about your happiness in the long term. : )

Answer 10

We can't force people to love us, can we? If she wants to marry another guy, let her do it. She might have been unfair and bad to you, but you don't have any right to go and talk to her husband-to be, they both know what they're doing, so it's their business, not yours. About thinking of suicide: life is full of possibilities my friend, you'll find another girl who 'll deserve you, love you as you deserve to be loved and with whom you'll have much better sex;)