What do you do when you hate your mother so much that sometimes you wish she was dead?

Question

I don't know what to do and I know it's terrible but I hate my mother. I really do hate her and I can't believe she's my mother. I know she gave birth to me but that's all I have to thank her for because she doesn't know how to be someone's mother and never acts like one. She's always been a two-faced, selfish b i t c h who lies and steals and I'm really ashamed of her. She never makes sacrifices for anybody not even her kids and only thinks about herself. I just can't stand her any longer sometimes I just wish she was dead. I know I'll probably go straight to hell for saying this but you don't know what it's like to live with someone like her. She's a psycho b i t c h who used to abuse me physically and mentally when I was little but not anymore. Now that I'm older she can't hurt me anymore but I just feel so disgusted knowing that a part of me came from her.

Answer 1

Get into therapy. I, too, have had a terrible relationship with my mother, but therapy helped me stop hating and start living. Hating only hurts YOU. Now I can put our relationship into perspective. I don't have to agree with her choice and/or actions, but I can process my response and come out much healthier in the end.

Answer 2

This is very sad. I once felt this way about my mom, but I don't anymore. You would benefit from some counseling. You won't always feel this way forever. 15 years from now you may find that you feel differently. However, it's great to accept how you feel and let yourself grieve what was lost as much as possible. This is something you'll want to work through and it will take time. Just don't do anything that you'll regret. You need some space - like going to live far away for a number of years. You need healing and then you'll be able to enter into a healthy new phase in your life and your relationship with your mom eventually. Just don't lose hope. I found that it was me that needed alot of change - damaged by the past as I was - but I personally needed to change, forgive - heal - all that. Eventually you come to a place where you have no expectations of mom, you don't need her emotionally or for anything else. You come to a place where you can recognize some of the good memories of the past - even if you can't dream of any right now - that's okay. You will come to a place of total forgiveness - accepting that she will never be the mom you needed and allowing other people to give you what she could not. You'll come to a place where it won't hurt anymore. Don't let anyone tell you there's no hope and that nothing can change. You can change and that can make all the difference in the world! You'll come to a place where you'll just want to give her love in whatever form she knows how to accept it recognizing that the best you can do is enough and it's okay that it will never be just right.

Answer 3

ur a different person, ur not ur mother so make sure u do things that are way different than her,,,,,,..move away as far as possible..if possible ..

Don't see a shrink bc they mess things up even further but do see an adult that u can trust & help. Any other realtives that aren't psycho like her??? if yes then try to get help from them.

Some parents are bad parents bc A-they're not educated, B-they have problems just like any1 else & have gone thru tough times, or C-they're truly are PSYCHO!

Also know that like u said she only gave birth & im glad u understand & know u can be better & not make the same mistakes bc u-r a different person:)

God is near to da broken hearted even when it may seem like hes not. Trust in him, he will listen. Also, this will make u stronger what u have gone thru is a lot & u survived. Find a better job so u can move out. Like nursing school or somethin to do with helpin ppl since uve been thru it, u'll understand others.

Also, once u move out try to 4give ur mother, im not sayin to forget just forgive. It'll be better for u as well.

Best wishes!!!!

Answer 4

Sounds like you really do love your mother very much but are hurt by the way she treats you and others. It seems like your mom probably had a rough life when she was growing up and may have been abused. She is hurting also. It may not be her fault that she is the way she is. You may have to step up and be the bigger person. Instead of fighting and arguing with her, try to help her and listen to her if you can (feel sorry for her). Wishing she were dead is not right, but only natural. When she's gone for real it will be one of the toughest times of your life. You're just going to have to be strong and make it.

Answer 5

First you need to realize that it is OK to hate your mother and wish her dead. IT IS NOT OK TO ACT OF THIS!!!

No where is it written down that we have to like our parents or get along with them or even to want to be in the same room with them.

One of the few things we HAVE to do is not want to kill them or TRY to kill them.

Is there someone you trust enough to talk to this about.?

Are you old enough where you can start working and save your money to move out.?

Maybe then you might see your mother in a different light or not and then you are not around her so you do not have to worry about it.

Answer 6

Eh...sounds like my mother...we don't speak....she just screams at me to do things and give her money, and that's the only time we talk...but yeah..

if you're still living at home, then move out, either with another relative, a friend, or alone....

if there is no way you can move right now, chin up and make the best of it...you won't have to deal with her anymore once you can leave...

Answer 7

One day when you are adult and a mother you will look back at this feeling that you are having about your mother and understand the feeling and hurt that you are having at this time . i also as a Young girl hated my mom and wished that she was dead ....but when i got older i had a great relationship with her and she has passed away 3 yrs ago and EVERY day i wish she was here so i could talk with her and get her advice ...i miss her so much !!!

Answer 8

I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL!! MY MOTHER IS ALSO A PSYCHO ***** AND TRUST ME, I WISH THAT SHE WOULD FALL OFF OF THE FACE OF THE EARTH!! BUT I CAN'T MAKE THAT HAPPEN, EVEN THOUGH I WANT IT TOO! YOU SEE MY MOM AND I NEVER REALLY GOT ALONG, SHE ALWAYS GOT ALONG WITH MY SISTER. SO, I LEFT MY MOTHER AND MOVED IN WITH MY FATHER. SEEK HELP FROM A PSYCHIATRIST OR SOMEBODY THAT YOU CAN TALK TO AND THAT CAN REALLY UNDERSTAND YOU. I KNOW THAT IT IS HARD HAVING A MOTHER THAT IS A ***** AND TREATS YOU LIKE DIRT, BUT SHE IS STILL YOUR MOTHER. IF YOU EVER WANT TO TALK TO ME, JUST E-MAIL ME AT: [e-mail] or you can chat with me on yahoo too! screen name: chelsirabalais_2004. so, take my advice and talk to somebody that can give you advice on what to do about your trouble with your mom.

Answer 9

Move to a state far far away get a life and move on, somewhere something good will come of your life so just move on. And don't lit this thing that happened to you spill over on to your kids!!

Answer 10

it happens..unfortunately we cant chose our family....i m sorry u have a mother wit whom u cant get along...just try to build ur life away frm her..i know its tough but try to pity her.....just keep ur sanity....i know coz i too have hated my mom for d same reasons u have but today i m 27 and have started feeling bad for her instead of hating her......