My girlfriend and I are really in love. Everything between us is amazing except she is having problems with the fact I have a 5 yr old daughter. I have my daughter 3 days a week and my girlfriend is feeling anxiety about us getting really serious because she's scared of being a mother figure. Which I dont expect at all and she knows this. I completely respect and understand her fears but obviously my daughter is not going anywhere. Shes scared and thats normal! Anyone else in a similar situation? There has to be some tools to work through this! Ive been feeling like my daughter is a liability for our relationship and I dont want to feel that way!!!
2006-12-03 16:30:03 · 6 answers · asked by veg27 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I am a step-parent. and know from experience that it is really hard to take on that responsibility. My step sons could be very disrespectful at times and it put a strain on my marriage. If your girl friend is not sure she can handle it, then maybe you should look elsewhere. Your daughter should be always your main concern.
2006-12-03 16:35:20 · answer #1 · answered by justcurious 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Find someone else. This person has to be involved with YOU and YOUR DAUGHTER. There are no ways around it and no excuses. This girlfriend seems immature and you should find someone with a similar situation or someone who accepts your daughter as well as accepting you.
Do you know that there are some people who have a prior kid and when they get married, they include the child in the wedding? The man or woman will say "I (whoever) take (whoever and child) to be my lawful (wife/husband) and child."
If you force this relationship you will have trouble in the future. I am not saying give up, but strictly let this girlfriend know your stance. Your daughter should be number one at this point until your girlfriend and you are to the serious point. If your girlfriend can't get past you having a child to think about too, you are not at the point where she matters.
2006-12-03 16:50:37 · answer #2 · answered by AveGirl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The only girl in your life that matters is your daughter. She is the only one you should spend your every waking minute or your time with. NOT A GIRLFRIEND. Kick her to the curb, or only see her when you daughter is with her mom. 3 days a week is better then most dads get. Don't get remarried. This may cause your girlfriend to go else where, but that's OK because your full attention needs to be on your daughter.
2006-12-04 20:18:19 · answer #3 · answered by olschoolmom 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I too am a Step parent, and my step-children were always trying to put me & my wife at odds. Once they figured out I was not going any where the boys gave up and the daughter was relentless. We went to counseling for it and it helped, but she tried to hard and said many mean and hurtful things. You just need to exlpain to her what her role could be, if she can't handle it and won't try some kind of parenting courses, then look elsewhere my friend. Your child comes 1st
2006-12-03 16:41:05 · answer #4 · answered by back2skewl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She sounds like that she might be jeolous that you will give your daughter more attention than her. Tell her to grow up , you and your daughter come as a package deal. No one should make you feel uncomfortable about your daughter and she definantly is not a liability.
2006-12-04 12:50:17 · answer #5 · answered by Calais 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
have patience, some time will cure it all
2006-12-03 16:35:22 · answer #6 · answered by Shammi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋