I'm havng relationship issues. I'm recently engaged, wanting t marry all my life......We (fiance and I) are under some unforseen stress and are not ourselves. I am unsure of my previous decision to accept marriage proposal or not.....He asked me at the begining of our stress, now I'm not sure if my dubts are because this stress, or my real feelings comming out....i need someone to talk to!!!!
2006-12-03 16:08:21 · 10 answers · asked by paramel227 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Seek counseling and try to find ways to destress your life. Wait for the stress factors go away before actually getting married. See how the relationship works without it.
2006-12-03 16:18:36 · answer #1 · answered by Pantherempress 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It may be that you want to marry him, but that you guys need to get all your ducks in a row. Take some time -- there's no limit on an engagement. Take a breather from wedding plans to deal with the other, and more important issues. Once that's dealt with, then revisit the marriage ideas. As the stress fades, your true feelings about the wedding will come out and your will get a much clearer picture.
Slow down, and take it one step at a time.
2006-12-03 17:06:37 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet Susie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even without unforeseen stress, many bride-to-be's go through periods of doubt. You are stepping into the unknown future by accepting his proposal. It is of course naturally to be thinking about you, him, the future, the what ifs, whether he is definitely the one.
Try to first find a way to destress yourself. Find some personal time. Go get a manicure/pedicure. Or maybe get a massage or warm bubble bath. Don't think about anything but what makes you feel good. When you are relaxed and comfortable, think of a way to destress him.
Once both of you are back to your normal selves (at least temporarily), talk frankly about your feelings and concerns since the proposal. Maybe both of you are feeling that way! It's okay. It probably just mean you man want to have a longer engagement so that you can have your "stress issues" under control, and your emotions in check.
Good luck. Don't forget to take good care of yourself.
2006-12-03 16:39:12 · answer #3 · answered by Benji's Mommy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh My Goodness... I am going through the same thing.... I have just recently had a talk with my fiance'.... I told him my feelings and that I just don't want to be married right now... he still wants me to marry him but I just didn't want to get married right now... there is alot that comes with marriage and I just don't know if I am having cold feet since this is my first marriage his second or what.... There is alot going on and alot of stress so I told him and now that I am not stressing about it and the marriage is off for right now I am able to think clearly... Now I am having doubts whether I want to be married at all... I still have alot to think about, whether he is the guy for me, or do I really want to get married right now.... I am only 24 and have alot of dreams that will never get accomplished if I marry... Getting married is all I wanted, and now that it happened I don't want too... I know how you feel....
2006-12-04 09:06:45 · answer #4 · answered by daisyduke_205 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find out where is the stress, from Family? Fiancial issue, wedding cost too much? need more time .. . You are engaged not married yet. Give yourself more times, do not give invitation card to any one right way, but take your time. Consultant who never met you and your family before , may give you some good suggestion. Idearibbon.com is a wedding accessories main supplier, they are metting hundres of Moms who are buying things for their daugter's wedding, sometimes they stress out
2006-12-03 18:22:38 · answer #5 · answered by Idea Ribbon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't go making any rash decisions, hon. I wish I knew what has caused your stress, but a lot of times things can be resolved, you know. Some typical issues that create stress are financial, family, substance abuse, cheating, irreconcilable differences...And you need to discuss your issues at length with a counselor instead of getting a string of paragraphs from people out here.
2006-12-03 16:59:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me as though it is time to do some soul searching. Being married is over rate, it is just a state of being. I marriage that starts out streed will continue to be stressed and the small stuff will tuen into big stuff. Take some time off and rethink this situation.
2006-12-03 16:34:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
if your asking, then probably no. When youre ready, you will know. I promise. Marriage its a big step, but its suppose to be a wonderfull time, and you should be enjoying your engagement, and not stressing all the time. Good luck.
2006-12-03 21:35:53 · answer #8 · answered by babes 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just take it easy for a while, don't make any big decisions, postpone wedding if it has been planned and see how you 2 fare through this difficult time. this could be a blessing, you are getting to see if you 2 can work through hard times. better to know now
2006-12-03 18:20:58 · answer #9 · answered by kitkat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how old you are but in any case I am saying this from personal experience...
don't get married unless you are SURE.
just postpone your wedding for now until you two can figure out what it is that is bothering you.
Good luck
2006-12-03 16:39:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋