Ok my fiancee and i have joint custody of his child. We started potty training her awhile back. Well before the custody hearing we would have her for awhile like 5 to 6 days and she was doing really good. Well since the court date they judge agreed to every other 3 days which her bio mom wanted. Now it is so hard we get her to use the potty but at the 2nd day but then she goes back to her bio mom and they arn't potty training her we have told her we were trying, but i guess she doesn't have the time for her child. Has anyone went through this kind of situation before?
2006-12-03 15:53:19 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
If the child is willing, and you and your fiancee are making headway with the training, keep it up! Despite the bio mother not contributing, the little girl sounds very bright, and with your persistence, will probably manage right along, if, until, and beyond bio mommy participating. Hang in there, I wouldn't throw the towel in yet--Sounds like you have a very "with it" little girl on your hands, lucky you!!
2006-12-03 16:05:13 · answer #1 · answered by spamneggzzz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you might be best served by not having the child come to visit you for a bit. Let her learn potty training in a single environment...that is with her biological Mom.
Try and put your selves in this poor kids place. Where is home? Where is safe? Whose rules do you follow? This poor kid is being put in an impossible situation because of the adults in her life! So give the kid some space. Let her have some stability in the form of just staying put for a bit. She doesn't understand all the crap that is going on around her. All she knows is that a number of adults shuffling her from place to place and then asking her to have some responsibility. She doesn't even know where she lives!!! For heavens sake.
Does anyone EVER try and think about things from a 2 year olds point of view?
2006-12-04 00:10:35 · answer #2 · answered by huckleberry 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have, and the best thing to do is tell her that she needs to make the effort to keep up the potty training. Tell her that in the end it will cost her a lotless money to buy toilet paper than it will to buy diapers and/or pull ups. Explain to her what you have done at home, and tell her what she can do to keep it going. The cost alone should help.
Does she even know that you guys have her potty trained?
It could be the child. My niece does great with my mom or myself, using the potty. She does great at school. As soon as she is around her mom, she is right back into pull ups, even though her mom does the same things that we do. The doctor said it was just her way of getting her mom's attention.
2006-12-03 23:57:06 · answer #3 · answered by Franky 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, I realize that the relationship may not be great with her mother (and she may or may not care enough to cooperate), but you need to have a discussion with the mother on a strategy to potty train. This is something you will have to do for the rest of her childhood, so you should get used to it now. If the mother still doesn't follow through, you just have to keep plugging away in the time you have with her. It will likely make it much more difficult, but all you can do is keep at it and get used to it!
2006-12-03 23:58:42 · answer #4 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This happened to me as well when my wife left. Try agreeing to a schedule of times to put the little one on the potty. No matter what home he/she is in, a set schedule to be placed on the potty will click in for the little one to realize no matter were they are, the bathroom is there when they need to go. Of course, remember to watch their reaction when they act like they have to go, then simply take them to the bathroom. Regretfully if it is not a joint effort, you will just have to be consistent at your house with the little one, not much you can do if the other parent does not want to cooperate. Best luck in the potty training method. Sincerely, Mr. Dad
2006-12-04 00:04:00 · answer #5 · answered by F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes this is very hard i guess just sit down with her and inform her that u are trying to potty train her and her help would be appreciated. if she is not willing to help or not receptive to this i would ask her what her views are because it is very hard on a child to have to go back and forth because the training does not get inforced between the three of u u'll have to come up with a routine that works for her good luck i've been in this situation before.
2006-12-03 23:57:34 · answer #6 · answered by jenna w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well with my son I just made him use the bathroom before he went to bed then I woke him up in the middle of the night and put him on the toilet...this should train your little girl not to pee in the bed.
2006-12-04 00:08:23 · answer #7 · answered by Trae 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way it will work is if mom agrees to do her part at her home, otherwise all your work will do no good
2006-12-03 23:55:47 · answer #8 · answered by notAminiVANmama 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋