There are times I feel this way see ? below:?

Question

I know the Bible says to forgive those who hurt you and bless those who curse you but there are things that have happened in my life as a youth and a child that has caused damage to me as well as the unhealthy relationships that I was in, even though I have truly forgive there are remnants or remains of what happened and I do get flashbacks. I want to be able to go forward and go ahead in my walk with the Lord, not go backwards.
How have you handled these things when they happened to you?

Answer 1

I had some very painful things happen to me in my past when I was a little girl. I have forgiven the people who hurt me so badly, but you are correct ~ remnants and flashbacks do seem to come every now and then. Sometimes when the pain comes or flashbacks come, it means your heart and mind are ready to deal with some pain that you were unable to deal with back then. The mind has a way of protecting a child when they are being hurt. The mind will bury those feelings or freeze them to avoid the trauma of the moment. When you've given your life over to Jesus Christ, it does not mean that God will not ask you to walk through the pain of what you endured. Just means He will go through it with you. Some days I get into a nice pity party and catch myself being mad at God for having to go through what I went though and CONTINUE to go through. He knows my heart anyways, so I just tell Him. I've been fortunate enough to work with an amazing Christian counselor who has helped me process the pain of my past with the Word of God and learning how to "reprogram" the message that my mind got so long ago from the abusive situations I was in. Whatever you do, don't avoid those feelings. Have them. Cry your heart out to God. Tell Him how you feel. Then move on. If you need help processing your feelings (which is perfectly normal), get some counseling from a licensed Christian counselor in your church or in your town.

Sometimes tho, the counselor wasn't available. But God has ALWAYS been there. I've come to Him with every feeling I've had. I make the choice to forgive all over again. Forgiveness is a process sometimes. Feeling the pain doesn't mean you haven't forgiven. Having flashbacks doesn't mean you haven't forgiven. Being angry at what happened doesn't mean you haven't forgiven. Forgiveness is a choice. The person who abused me is with the Lord. I led him to Christ before he died. Was the most powerful thing I've ever experienced. But I'm still dealing with the effects of his actions and HE is in heaven. Pisses me off sometimes. I told God a few months ago, "I sure hope he's interceding for me up there, cuz he's repsonsible for this mess!".

Know that you won't always be in pain. Know that there are others who have been through similar experiences and have overcome. You can contact me @ [e-mail] if you have any other questions. Be blessed!

Answer 2

I was just wondering if you had the chance to tell the person or persons that hurt you that you forgive them. Have they had a chance to ask for your forgiveness? Sometimes that is all you need to be able to move on. Now when you say you have flashbacks, it makes me think that you might need some professional counseling. Some wounds go so deep and can cause other physical and emotional problems. It never hurts to talk to someone. And please remember to talk to God also. Pray. He is there for you all the time. Good luck and God Bless.

Answer 3

Well I was hurt / rejected in a ministry. So was hurt. I thought I had forgiven & forgotten.

In a prayer group, I brought this up, and I saw clearly & loudly the hurt as we prayed. I asked God? But returned the hurt to sender after dipped in His love. Well, it left me for good. So it wasn't me not forgiving someone, or maybe I wasn't forgiving somehow, but it was a curse for sure.

Old wounds take a while to mend. It may have wounded you years ago, and people can restab it by a similar comment. The Lord showed me that root wound curse clearly & removed it while praying with others, when I thought I was over it.

So, pray in the Spirit with others or your personal prayer time, and give these hurts to the Lord. Cast all your cares on Him for He cares for you.

Answer 4

I have had the kind of feelings you are talking about. I had serious resentments against certain people for years. In fact, these persons still continue to tax my patience at times. I try to practice forgiveness. The way I practice is by praying for them. Over and over again. Its a process. As you pray for the person it heals you. Sometimes it feels like betraying my own hurts to pray for them so I don't do it. But when I am ready, I set aside time and practice praying for their well being, that they are in the light of God etc.
Through this practice I gradually grow in Love and Love heals all wounds.

Answer 5

I'm sorry you have had a rough time but what I always do is think of all the little children who are born with terrible incurable diseases, measure that against any pathetic ills I might suffer and get on with my life. You cannot ghange what has gone so live for today and plan for the future. If you need religion to help you through then go with that. Best of luck.

Answer 6

I threw myself fully into my faith and my kids.I am determined to give them a better life than I had.I know people say that you have to live for yourself but I found it easier to live for someone eles.Also I seem to find people everywhere that are less fortunate than I am or need some kind of help.And it helps me to help other people becuase I can't seem to see anyone hurt.I feel better when I try make a difference great or small.

Answer 7

I haven't experienced what you have however I wanted to reply. You can seek counseling out and you can also talk with God and ask him to heal you from all damages from years past so you can move on with your life. You must be a true believer, you must turn this all over to him to lay it all to rest. Your faith must be strong and must continue as you walk with him daily. Pray as much as you can, be in contact with the Lord and he will be in contact with you.

Answer 8

Forgiving is easy, forgetting is ill advised--you had those experiences to learn from, and they have taught you lessons that God doesn't want you to forget--God wants you to be safe, happy and healthy--he knows that in your heart you want to forgive, but scars don't go away overnight--he will give you the time you need to heal

Answer 9

The only answer I have for you is pray hard. I have had things in my past that will pop in my head from time to time. Pray for God to take the pain away. He can do anything you know. God bless and Merry Christmas

Answer 10

i try to only think of the good things even though the bad was very real.