Is my new girl friend playing games?

Question

I've been dating her for a month. We have had sex. Everything seemed fine. Yesterday I texted her and then she texted me back right away. I texted her again and she didn't answer me. She hasn't called me today after I left her a message last night saying that I was concerned why she didn't text me back. I refuse to call her again because she would definitely have a clear upper hand. I hate these games, but she started it. She is probably banging someone right now. lol

Answer 1

yeah, she might be trying to see if you will pursue her....but me a man, and hold your ground. Good luck....

Answer 2

I've got news for you - withholding action because you don't want to give her the upper hand IS playing games. Why is it always the game-players who whine the most about game playing? She might have a lot of perfectly good reasons for not returning your messages - she might have gotten busy, she might have missed the messages, or she might not be that into you. But YOU are the one game-playing right now because you want to contact her, but you don't because of how it will look. Try one more time - if she still ignores you, then take that as a sign of disinterest - not game-playing - and go find someone who likes you more.

Answer 3

If you think or cant trust your gf enough and you think that she's banging another guy...well.you must have reasons for that. I dont know. But it seems a little like miscommunciation. Never look on the worst side of things. Maybe she's just busy. But find out anyhow. It's better to find out if she's cheating only in a month of time investment, rather than keep it going and you getting more hurt. I hope this helps. Good luck man. :-)

Answer 4

Yes, she is playing games. But sometimes we play games to test people and their characters. Instead of waiting for the real problems to pop up in a relationship we create smaller scenarious as little tests. If you partner reacts in a way that is acceptible to you then you contine with the relationship with more confidence.

It is a defence mechanism. Instead of finding out that the person does not suit you in 2 years when something big comes up, you find out straight away.

The other reason for playing games is due to insecurity or for attention. These are not such good things, but why not play a couple of the games and see where it goes.

Answer 5

Ok, you asked why she didn't text you back. Bad move. If she contacts you and apologizes within a couple of days and says she wants to have a blast with you you can pretty safely assume she's being honest and you're as guilty as her for "playing games". But if she takes more than a couple of days more to contact you in some form, she's like the one playing the games (or rapidly/insecurely choosing sudden disinterest) in which case, even if you do contact her after said couple of days and she wants to go out, I would look at the advice below:


Seriously though, be honest with yourself: a girl who doesn't contact you even for a 5 minute call in four days 90% isn't looking for love. In that case, in your "relationship" with her, look to become a better lover and have fun not hold a serious relationship (at least until she stops the games) both for the sake of honesty and your own self-confidence. Worst case you'll be better at your "thing" for the next girl.


If you did a good job and wore her out doing the intimate stuff, weren't a slobbery kisser, etc. you're probably ok. Unless she's shown signs she wants to do the nasty with you but not be seen in public, in case she's probably staying away from you for supposed status (her insecurity, not your problem).

If you see her and she talks to you and doesn't ask about going to your place (or something similar), I'd make a point of saying "hey have you seen (name a fairly cute girl who likes you)? I was going to chill out with her the next time you become busy, you're just not very fun lately." She might flame up and accuse you of getting together with her, but just ignore her like you don't care.
She's either going to realize you're as competitive as she is and she'd better quit to be a serious girlfriend or be honest to you about being a friend with benefits. If you don't make it obvious you're strong and have other options she's likely just going to, like you said, run around cheating on you and expect you to take it, then ask you to pay the bills on dates. And, trust me man, you don't want to go there so respect yourself and take a stand.

Answer 6

What was the text about? The last thing you said might have had something to do w/ it. If not, let her make the next move. Stop the game playing before it starts.

Answer 7

Silly!
She's probably just busy. Or not in the mood to talk to you. She's probably not even playing games, but you definitely are.
You've only been together for a month, sex or no sex, so you really don't have a right to keep tabs on her.

Answer 8

She may be busy, but not with what you may think. She couldn't have been around her phone the second time around. Whenever you get a hold of her, in person, talk to her about her behavior. Good communication is the best part of a relationship but is there isn't then a relationship is out of the question. Talk to her about it and tell her how you feel!! I hope I helped!!!

Answer 9

Wow...calm yourself. She probably isnt sitting by her phone every second waiting for a text or call. Give her some time, and she will call when she is ready. Girls need space. Just give her the time and space, and if she doesnt call in 2 days, then you can be worried. But you need to relax.

Answer 10

Maybe she is busy just let her do her own thing,she will call when she is ready.
And you said she might be banging someone right now? Not a good start to a relationship

Answer 11

She may be testing you to see if you aren't the kind of jerk that won't call because he wants the upper hand ... and if you are asking this question then it sounds like she already has the upper hand ... good luck dude!