I have been going to the gym, working, hanging with friends, trying new activities. Yet, I am miserable. I have been changing my style of clothes, started wearing make-up, but I feel like Im doing it for the wrong reasons. When I see him to get my things from his house, I want him to see me in a new light, and Im doing all this for him and not for me. Which I know is wrong.
I am doing all the things listed above and its not working. I actually feel weaker, and I feel like a loser, cause Im a good girl, and he left me for someone totally opposite from me.
2006-12-03 10:11:06 · 20 answers · asked by confusedbrowngirl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sweetie, you've got to realise that he isn't worthy of you. You might think you're heart broken now, but in time you will get over it. He might think he's sowing his wild oats with this other girl and he might rue the day he ever dumped you. What you do have to realise is that if a man is worthy of you, he'd never leave you. You can't compete with every other female. Chances are you'll have other relationships that turn like this in time - but don't lose faith - you're bound to meet someone who loves you soon.
2006-12-03 10:16:01 · answer #1 · answered by Agony Aunt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
fisrt off i wanna say sorry. this is gonna hurt for a little while. and i wanna applaud you for hanging with your friends, but honey, you shouldn't change anything about your self. what he did was wrong. you should try to win him back by molding yourself into a different girl. you should be yourself and one day you'll meet a great guy who will love you just the way you are. it's gonna take some time before you're really able to move on and get him out of your mind. if there's something there that makes him seem like a good guy (forgetting about what he did for a minuet) then maybe further down the road you guys can be friends, but no more than that. My boyfriend of four months left me and it was so hard to forget him. but once i started seeing that him leaving me had nothing to do with me, i was able to hold my head high again. now he and i are friends and i wouldb't ever dream of dating him again. you're not the loser, he is. one day he'll see what he lost and he'll regret losing you. hold your head high and face the world. be strong and forget him.
love always,
slacker
2006-12-03 10:21:10 · answer #2 · answered by santaz_lil_slacker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Like you said, you're doing it for the wrong reason. The best thing for you to do in order for him to see you in a new light is to let go off him. To become cool without him. You need to honestly tell yourself that you don't need him. Whatever you do, don't change too much. The bottom line is that you need to be able to love yourself before you can expect anybody else to. Are you happy with your new hair and clothes?
Also, I went through this before and I think that hanging out with single friends are the best. Just go out and have fun again. Just be true to yourself. Find your good points. Don't let him change you into something you don't want to be. Don't be weak. You're tough and you're better than that.
Remember that the most important person is yourself. Even if you don't get him, there's always someone else who will love you for who you are.
2006-12-03 10:17:22 · answer #3 · answered by Lotii 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No amount of work on the outside is gonna fix what's on the inside, and as much as you want him to see you in a new light...it doesn't change the fact that he made his decision to hurt you and you don't owe him a damned thing for it.
Look deep inside yourself and seriously re-evaluate your life without a single thought about his opinion of you. The best revenge is living well. If you get that straight, then someday you'll run into that guy and not even give him a second glance. I can guarantee you that.
No worries.
2006-12-03 10:17:52 · answer #4 · answered by randomthoughtpatterns 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know you've heard this a million times but time will definitely heal a broken heart. It's great that you are trying new activities but don't don't don't try to change yourself! Meanwhile, don't try to suppress your feelings though-cry when you want to, until your tears dry out. You are wonderful as you are and he just wasn't the one for you. But life goes on. There are many more people to meet - though it may be hard at first, eventually, you'll meet someone loads better than him. Trust me and good luck!
2006-12-03 10:45:51 · answer #5 · answered by Candy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, girl...keep up all the good changes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but, i think that you have to stop comparing yourself to the person he left you for. because honestly, HE WILL WANT YOU BACK. and you better not take him!!!!!!!!! trust me, this has happened to me. you should be doing all these healthy things for you and although it hurts now, the pain will, within time, go away. he made a very big mistake and when he will realize it, it will be too late. i think that you should continue doing what you are doing and start dating other guys. as hard as that seems, you should. you may never know what will happen, you may very well find your prince. again, good job for changing things in your life and just make sure he doesnt try to come back to you. not now anyway. best of luck girl!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-03 10:16:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You forgot the most important thing to do. To heal that beautiful heart that been broken. You need to restore it's faith allowed to honestly forgive and stop asking what you did wrong. We are not perfect and part of loving is finding that special someone that will accept you just the way you are. It seems you almost there.Keep believing in your self. Good luck.
2006-12-03 10:20:15 · answer #7 · answered by Iris 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the thing is: are you over him yet?
if you WANT to be over him but you just cant let go, try this: it has worked for me.
tell yourself that you are over him. say that you are over him ten times everyday. it works for me.
and dont feel like a loser. i used to always feel like one, like i wasn't good enough, but get a piece of paper and drag out all of those good qualities in you, and dont be modest about it. then recite those good things to yourself in front of a mirror 3 times per day. it really helps you gain confidence
and remember that you are never not good enough for someone. dont compare youself to that boy's girlfriend and think that you're not good enough. youre better. so overpower that "loser" girl in your mind and move on.
i really hope this helps!
2006-12-03 10:16:47 · answer #8 · answered by C♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to be yourself. just because he left you for another girl doesn't mean you aren't worth anything, it means that he doesn't know a good thing when he's got it. you don't need him, you'll find someone better suited for you. if YOU want to go to the gym, than do it. if YOU want to change your wardrobe, do it for YOU, not joe-shmoe. don't feel like a loser, HE'S the one who is losing out.
2006-12-03 10:16:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how u feel my ex boyfriend was still dating me and was a different chicks house one night when i called he was never at home so one day my mom went some where and saw his dad so she asked him and he said that he was at a chicks house trying to hook up with her, i didnt want to do anything i did the same thing but i finally found somebody that really loves me and wanted to be with me and thats my husband so hang in there u will finally find some body and if u ever want to talk e-mail me @ bobbys_baby_88@yahoo.com i will talk to you.. and just remeber u'll find somebody one day it might not be soon but they will be worth it
2006-12-03 10:18:39 · answer #10 · answered by bobbys_baby_88 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋