should i do something to prevent this(i.e. call cps) bc he doesnt do it in a abusive way. he does more of in a perverted way.In front of everyone. I asked my nephew about it and he said that its humilating. and i asked him if my bro touched him and said no... but i still have my doubts. what should b done? my mom accused him of molesting is older son a few yrs back and it damn near tore our family apart
2006-12-03 07:53:08 · 32 answers · asked by James 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
call cps now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-03 08:10:13 · answer #1 · answered by Charles B 2 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Dear James,
Your brother may not be the best father and he's guilty of a form of abuse by humiliating the child but it doesn't warrant calling social services. I know everyone on here is going to ding me for this but families like yours, who are tuned in, can handle this far better than a goverment agency coming in and turning your lives upside down.
If your nephew says nothing happened you should take that as fact and not "lead him" to social services - he needs to know you are there for him. Explain to him your feelings about abuse as he may need a clear definition - when someone is being abused they don't always realize it because it's what they're use to - and some children are conflicted about abusive parents who are suppose to love and protect them.
Your nephew does need to get the message help is available if he needs it, from YOU.
Best wishes,
pup
2006-12-03 08:03:24 · answer #2 · answered by . 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You or someone your brother trusts (his best friend) need to have a sit down with him and my thoughts on this are for one kind of like what Tony Soprano might do! Hold him close, slap his cheek, wag your finger 1/4 inch from his nose while saying "I see you do that again...", a kiss on the cheek and a giggle when you let him go.
"Humiliating someone is not discipline it is the egotistical method used to appear superior to get your want addressed and your self-serving method impresses know one." is what I told my best friend every time I witnessed her behavior. She finally got the message.
Some people should not be parents and this young man needs you to help balance his life. His father needs intensive parenting classes and maybe anger management classes as well.
2006-12-03 08:26:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
wow! he is much to old to be getting spanked.and in front of people! i think that if i were you i would confront your brother, tell him that if you hear of this going on one more time that you will call cps on him.i don't understand what you mean by in a perverted way,but regardless tell him that's what you are going to do. maybe he is touching your nephew but he is to afraid to say. what I'm having a hard time understanding is when he does this in front of people why doesn't anyone do some thing to stop it?
2006-12-03 08:31:33 · answer #4 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cant leave a 15 yr old to deal with that himself. He is in his Dad's power at that age.
Your brother's behaviour is weird, its like he is challenging you to do something. But he is humiliating your nephew and that has to stop. It is too serious to turn a blind eye. 15 is a vulnerable age so this could lead to a load of problems for your nephew if someone doesnt step in.
Have you tried talking to the older sibling to see if your Mom's concerns were justified?
2006-12-03 08:04:42 · answer #5 · answered by judipod 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hard One= That Is Your Brothers Child. But If He Is Abusive Thats Differant.
2006-12-03 07:57:58 · answer #6 · answered by mks 7-15-02 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try talking to your nephew about it again. Don't call the police unless your nephew admits that your brother has been molesting him bcuz if your wrong then it will really tear your family apart. If your brother does it again maybe you should talk to him in private.
2006-12-03 08:01:00 · answer #7 · answered by Kara 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you have some serious concerns that your brother may be "abusing" his son, I think it's your responsibility to report him to the proper authorities. Fifteen is a little "old" for a spanking, it sounds "strange" to me.
If you mom had suspicions a few years back about him molesting an older son, there could be serious cause for concern. Make the call now, your nephew's welfare could be at stake. Best of luck.
2006-12-03 07:56:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 4⤋
Yes, do consider calling somebody. This sounds like fetish-driven behavior, rather than any sort of real discipline. Sane, effective parents do not use corporal punishment on teenagers. In three years, that child will legally be a grown adult, and is far too old for such treatment.
2006-12-03 07:56:35 · answer #9 · answered by thaliax 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I think that is a sick way of disciplining a 15 year old, I think it is very humiliating. I think your nephew should maybe talk to a counselor at school or maybe a clergy person ot trusted adult. This isn't normal. Please get him some help.
2006-12-03 08:28:09 · answer #10 · answered by janet s 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok hon, first of all if he does it for perverted reasons or abuse or punishment etc. it is still wrong, you shoudl really call someone about it, cops, social services, etc. Please get this kid some help!! Thank you very much :)
2006-12-03 08:58:37 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋