Ex-Christians> Regardless of what you do/do not believe now, when you look back at when you were Christian...

Question

how do you feel? Do you ever miss being Christian? Do you sometimes feel angry? Have you ever felt that Christianity deceived you? Do you miss going to Church? Did some people stop associating with you when they realized you were no longer Christian? Talk about your feelings and experiences here.

Answer 1

I guess when I first started to question what I had been taught I felt sort of deceived. I realized before too long though that the people I knew and loved who were Christian had not intentionally deceived me. I don't miss Church. The people who mattered most, my closest friends and family still love me. Although I am sure my grandmother will never understand and will always hope that I change my mind. There are people who I have met since though that once they realize I don't share their beliefs choose not to pursue a closer relationship. Its okay with me because if they are that way then I think I'm better off anyway. I am fortunate because my husband is like minded and most of our friends and co-workers are people we met in graduate school or through work, I think a lot of people who go through that level in science tend to not be too fundamentalist and tolerant of differences in spiritual or religious beliefs or non beliefs.

The only thing that is weird for me really is some holidays, like Christmas. We have adopted celebrating winter solstice as a holiday but still participate with our family in some Christmas celebrations for family togetherness and respect. Then there is this whole culture war over Christmas thing which I don't really understand. Why can't we just allow each other differences in how we celebrate the holiday season?

Answer 2

I was a Christian yes, and I do have some bad memories of the past, but I am a happy person today and my past helped to form the happy person before you today. Do I miss it-no. I do not miss mass, nor the church. I didn’t lose any friends after leaving the church since I wasn’t very popular. As a young boy I enjoyed asking lots and lots of questions and this would just annoy everyone around me. I was always a bit a of a geek who never really fit in.

Christianity has taught me some very important lessons in very strange ways. I realize how important it is to accept people who are different because I was different and was never accepted by the church. I know how painful it can be. I also learnt that I have to make my own happiness because no outside force is able to do this for you.

The most important thing was how much people hate questions that challenge them. A question can shake the foundations of the self if one has an open mind.

When I got a little older I just stopped going. What was the point of going to a place that really didn’t want me. I always got the impression that everyone loved me but as long as I stayed far, far away. I didn’t realize that I wasn’t a Christian until a couple years later when someone asked me what my religion was and I had to think about it.

Answer 3

I don't miss being Christian per se because I always had questions that weren't answered and I always had beliefs that weren't "right" according to the Bible and it left me feeling very unfulfilled spiritually. I bounced around from church to church for several years trying to fill that spiritual void within myself.

I actually don't miss going to church as much as I miss having a church to go to if I wanted. My "church family" is now an hour away and that does make it a little difficult when I have religious issues, but it's what happens when you live in a small town where pagans aren't accepted. Not everyone knows I'm Wiccan and the ones who do are very accepting of ME because we're friends. I have no reason to go out onto the streets proclaiming I'm Wiccan to anyone else, just as I never had a reason to proclaim I was Methodist before.

However, after finding Wicca, I have finally filled that spiritual void in my life and although I'm not part of the mainstream religions, I'm happy with where I'm at religiously and spiritually.

Answer 4

Good question.

I am an ex-Catholic, even an ex-seminarian, so I can relate somewhat to your query since I've expressed my personal views about certain aspects here of what I discovered in my former religious affiliation.

I can only say that I am truly FORTUNATE to have a family that respects me for my own personal views, and judges me not.

My disillusionment is NOT AGAINST the Catholics AT ALL --since I know far too many of them who are honest and good people, including my own family and friends who are near and dear to my heart. But I have parted ways from Catholicism and my PUBLIC 'disassociation' is mainly against the doctrinal teachings of the Roman Catholic Church ALONE, and not any single person among her Faithful.

There are however, on occasion, certain situations I found here when Askers are too adamant in DEFENDING the RCC that I sometimes find a bit annoying for their petulence and/or ignorance of other information that I have unearthed.

Moreover, I have always been irritated by the likes of those hypocritical, Bible-thumping, self-righteous people who call themselves "Christians" --several of whom have reared their ugly heads here as well!

If I have offended any of you, I do apologize... but we're dealing with certain doctrinal issues here and we each are entitled to our own interpretations and opinions.

For the Atheists and others of different faiths out there, I respect you for your particular beliefs, for I also have friends who happen to be Atheists --as was I once for a second or two; then was a Buddhist; then was a Ufologist even [LOL]-- and I'm also familiar with Wiccan traditions and rituals.

Enough said.

Peace be with you!

Answer 5

I'm just glad I went to a respectable church that didn't insist on us preaching and pushing our religion on others all the time--we lived like normal people--I could never have been comfortable with proselytising, and would probably still be ashamed of myself now if I had done it. I don't miss it at all, it was always more of an obligation for me than a joy--I had to do all these "chores" and I was really only playing along because my mother made me--when I turned 18 I liberated myself from the whole mess--I have enough obligations in this world without the church adding to them

Answer 6

I don't miss it at all, it gave me no comfort anyway. Christianity is a big hoax that decieves all who believe it, it was made up by man in an effort to control people. The bible is no more than a book of stories, some are good stories, but nothing in there proves a thing, in fact it contradicts itself in so many ways it can't be viewed as anything other than fiction. If any friends i had are no longer my friends because i saw the light, i don't want to know them anyway. Yet another reason religion is a bad thing

Answer 7

My anger ebbed as I grew older, and grew into my own spiritual path. Now I am generally accepting of most Christians, although certain individuals and their behavior annoy me.

I do not miss church one bit. Most of that crowd were never close friends anyway; those that are remain fairly accepting of others.

When I was younger, I felt a lot of anger and betrayal for Christianity; even after I initially thought I'd broken free, there was years of "programming" to overcome. But it can be done; once Christianity no longer seems like a threat, once you refuse to let yourself be a captive, once you experience true liberation, fear and hate fade into pity.

Answer 8

I don't miss it. I still believe in God, I just have my own views of what's going on in the world. When I was a Christian, I felt that there had to be more to what was going on, and so I took it upon myself to find out what exactly that was. I look back and see it as a stepping stone to my spiritual growth. I see Christianity as a great goodness, and I'm glad that it exists.

Answer 9

It was fine and dandy when I was a kid. But there are plenty of other places I can go now besides church related functions. For example, there are the jaycee's, I play hockey with a bunch of friends. There are also work functions. And to top it all off, I get to sleep in on Sundays!

Answer 10

Well, I grew up in Utah, as a Mormon. Just didn't seem right to me. I didn't even know that there were other options out there until I moved. I found a path that made a lot more sense to me. and have been a happier more productive person then I have ever been.