My cousin and I grew up together and we used to be very close. Last year, she told me she wanted to move here to Gerogia to go to school. I told her she could stay with me for a few months which turned into a year. Her moving in with me was the worst thing I could have ever done! When she moved in, I saw the negative side of her and it pissed me off. She is used to men taking care of her and it showed in the way she acted towards me. We fell out over things because she was always paying her part of the rent late (it was only $200 a month)and I feel she became very jealous of me, my accomplishments and independence. I work for the things I have but she isn't used to doing that. We became distant because I seen her for who she really was. She has moved out and I barely hear from her now. I really want to restart our realtionship because she is family, we have kids that are the same age and I do love her dispite our differences. How shoud I go about trying to start over?
2006-12-03 05:52:03 · 9 answers · asked by chocolatebabycakes 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
have your cousin over for dinner and this way you should tell her you miss her and the closeness you two shared. tell her you know living together is not something we should do unless one of us is in trouble because you would never see her and her child outside in the cold or anything like that. let her know you will be there if she really needs you. but we need to try not to live together because it is true two women should not live in the same house. but i miss you and i want us to do things with our children and i want us to talk more and see each other more. because we can't live in the same House that shouldn't stop us from being family first and friend second. tell your cousin you love her and misses her, it really simple make that move.
2006-12-03 06:13:47 · answer #1 · answered by BLUE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you quite sure you want to restart this relationship? Family is one thing but it doesn't sound like the two of you are compatible any longer. Sometimes you just have to accept that fact and move on in life. Take some time to reevaluate whether or not this relationship is worth patching up. If it is, then you can simply call this person and tell her that you would like to talk. Set up a place to meet - make it a neutral site - like a nice restaurant. Make a list of all the things you want to discuss with her but don't pull it out during your conversation.
Let her know that she is and always has been important in your life. Apologize for anything you may have done that upset her and let her know in no uncertain terms you would like to begin to build back your relationship. Let her know that you would like your children to be able to enjoy each others company. When you are all finished, ask her directly if this is something that she feels as well.
Listen to everything she has to say. She may not want a relationship - if that's the case you need to give it up and move on in your life. You don't have to never talk to her again but you probably won't be going on vacation together either.
Good luck.
2006-12-03 14:08:18 · answer #2 · answered by LABL 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call her and meet her for coffee or something. When she gets there, tell her how sorry you are for making life hell during the time you were living together. Tell her how much you miss her and want have the same friendship as you used to have. Then tell her how badly you want to put it all behind you and how you can't believe you allowed it to get so bad. If you satrt saying how she contributed, you will screw it all up. You apologize completely, even if she starts in on you. You be the bigger person in this and soon, she will grow also. A lot of this is normal growing pains in a family. Good Luck.
2006-12-03 15:27:46 · answer #3 · answered by spag 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two need to sit down and have a heart to heart talk. Tell each other what is on your mind and in your heart. Stress the importance that you want to get your live back on track and in a positive relationship. Dont let material things get in the way of your lives. Be honest. Dont just hear what is being said, but actually listen! Best Wishes!
2006-12-03 13:58:44 · answer #4 · answered by Lena 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Strange contradiction in your being pissed of at your cousin and loving her at the same time.
Why don’t you call her, meet her once (maybe with the children) and decide then if you really want to be close to her again.
I know that ‘family’ is a tight bond, but don’t forget that you were pissed off by her.
2006-12-03 14:34:31 · answer #5 · answered by saehli 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call her and talk to her, or write her a letter explaining to her that you miss her as a friend and really just want to hang out. Don't mention the negitvity that happened between the 2 of you, be pleasant and happy, set up a date to go to dinner or something you both enjoyed doing togehter.
2006-12-03 14:08:49 · answer #6 · answered by jillifly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I realize that you are fairly new to the ATL and i would like to officially welcome you. You need to take "bABY steps" in renewing the relationship. One way is to send her a christmas card "from your family to hers" with nice pictures included. also include a heartfelt letter stating that you miss being amongst family and that you would like a fresh start... wish her blessings in life etc. make sure that you cherish birthdays and holidays in a very special way. im looking foward to hopefully meeting you one day.... if it is meant to be. sincerely, Dionn.(ATTRACTIVE SINGLE RETIRED NAVY VET 35).. your new friend in Marietta..... by the way, i have a feeling that we would love each other. Congratulations on all your accomplishments!!
2006-12-06 13:30:39 · answer #7 · answered by DIONN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just call her up one day and try talking to her and send cards and stuff like that and if she act's cold to you just be patient and try to work things out
2006-12-03 13:56:55 · answer #8 · answered by Sarah=hoplessly in love 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just give her a call
2006-12-03 13:54:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋