ok i have been talkin to this guy for like at the most a month and he tells me that he loves me and that he will never hurt but i have trust issues because of stuff that has happened in my past relationships(which he knows all about). So i guess my question is reither or not i should actually trust him or not. If you can help me PLEASE write me with your answer.
2006-12-03 05:25:30 · 25 answers · asked by Kimberly C 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You can't be in a relationship with someone if you don't trust them. Any time you open up or let yourself love you take the chance of getting hurt. Trust him until he shows you that he can't be trusted. But don't drive yourself crazy trying to catch him in a lie either. It will only make you sick.
2006-12-03 05:32:32 · answer #1 · answered by PHAT 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. If he says with his mouth that he loves you, you should already know that he loves you through his actions. If he really does love you, he will want to show it all the time and it will be obvious.
2. Whether or not he loves you--your relationship doesn't seem like it's going off on a good start, if you aren't even sure you can trust him.
3. If you aren't going to trust him and give him a chance, then you need to be honest with him. If you just aren't ready for this, from your past experiences, let him know that you need some time, and that it will give him time to show you that he really does love you and that you can trust him.
4. It seems like if he knows about your past and loves you he would be more sensitive to the fact that it will be hard for you to trust.
2006-12-03 05:41:36 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be secure with who you are before you can completely trust someone. The guy is probably a good guy, but not very smart.....or not very mature.
However, Anyone that says they love you and claims they will never hurt you after only a month is an idiot. People change and you can't promise something like that.
2006-12-03 06:08:13 · answer #3 · answered by tightlies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Big mistake telling a new boyfriend about your past relationships. Especially the hurting parts. It's like offering yourself up emotionally as a beggar saying, "please love me and don't hurt me!" I don't know why, but this usually brings out the worse in a guy. Worse thing you can do is show yourself to be a victim looking for some guy to be a knight in shining armor.
Take your relationship a day at a time.
2006-12-03 05:34:31 · answer #4 · answered by Chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In reality you're the only person that can answer that question. It depends on if you're ready to trust again. Think about how u feel about him, do u think that he will ever hurt u? Do u think that u will be able to trust him? Everyones not the same you know. Maybe, just maybe, you might want to consider giving him a chance.
2006-12-03 05:33:00 · answer #5 · answered by Boogie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ANY time someone tells you they will never hurt you, disregard that statement. That's something people say because they know the other wants to hear it, but they cannot know if they will stand behind it or not. It's meaningless....just the same as "I'll love you forever" is meaningless.
Be realistic...apparently he likes you, but you've only been talking a month and he's declaring love? That's a bit soon...go slow with things...you're never going to know you can trust someone until you've spent the time with them to see if they are worthy of your trust...
Don't blindly give it...but don't automatically distrust...let people prove themselves to you, and reserve judgement for when you feel you know them better...
You've got to take a chance at some point, or live alone because you aren't willing to take the risk...broken hearts mend...go for it...
2006-12-03 05:30:55 · answer #6 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's hard to start a new relationship when you've been burned in the past. Just go slow and take one day at a time.
If he is trustworthy, you'll trust him. If he's not, move on.
2006-12-03 05:33:59 · answer #7 · answered by tashatactics 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can try to help. well first of all we are a bunch of strangers so we couldn't really tell what to do, but you really have to decide if you can trust him or not on your own. In my opinion, I would say, give a try, you won't really discover love unless you put yourself out there. yes it will hurt if u become disappointed in the process but least you'll know and you'll know for next time. give it a try, you'll have that regret if you don't, you'll be thinkin shoulda, coulda, woulda. Good luck with everything.
2006-12-03 05:33:18 · answer #8 · answered by Honey83 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If any guy told me that he "LOVED ME" after a month, sorry, I would know he just wanted one thing... he doesn't KNOW you after just a month. It takes a long time to determine if you "LOVE" someone or not. He's just saying what he knows girls like to hear.
Don't let yourself get suckered in again!
That would be a serious red flag to me. How can he know he wouldn't hurt you?
I would proceed, but with caution, with eyes WIDE open. Go out with him, give him a chance to prove he's different, but take it slow.
2006-12-03 05:35:14 · answer #9 · answered by my-kids-mom 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that only you know for sure if you can trust him. If he knows about the issues you have with trust in the past, then he knows how important it is to not screw that up. If your gut tells you to trust him, then go for it (,meaning 'trust him').
2006-12-03 05:32:47 · answer #10 · answered by Mitch 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋