My son is 22 years old and just plain rude to me, what do I do?

Question

My son is 22 years old and lives in next door, I work all day, when I come home from work he is laying on my couch, he is currently laid off from work. When I leave for work it dosn't matter if I lock the door or not, he breaks in and uses my shower(he won't buy gas and does not have any hot water) and rents movies all day. I have asked him not to do this but he tells me I'm an asshole and leaves. Last weekend he had a party and they were playing the drums until late (after midnight) - I had watched his girlfriends daughter all day and she was not feeling well, I went over and knocked on the door and asked him to turn the music down and also said that he had a little girl upstairs who had been sick all day and told him he needed to grow up, he told me to lick his balls and that I was nothing but a ***** and all his friends laughed, I'm at my wits end with him. I'm looking for a new place to rent. I have always been good to my son and I don't know why he is treating me this way.

Answer 1

Move away from him, do not give him ANYTHING. Do not talk to him and if he breaks into your house call the police.

Answer 2

He is treating you this way because you let him. He is laid off so how does he pay rent.??? Anyway, It does matter by the law if the doors are locked or not if someone comes into your place WHO EVER it is and they are uninvited then it is call breaking and entering. Hello stupid you are just allowing this just you are a gutless wonder, call the police and file charges on your son who cares at this point what he thinks. Put real locks on your door if he breaks in call 911 right away. Tell them the burglar is in your home. You should have call the cops when his party got to loud after midnight. You must have no self esteem at all to let your son do any of this. Get off your butt mom and get with the real world. and give that son of yours a swift kick in the hind end.

Answer 3

Next time you find him in your home without your permission call the police and report breaking and entering. Its cruel and hard, but it will teach him some respect. You owe him nothing more than what you have already done to raise him. Or ask the neighbors to report him breaking in when he does it.

He does not treat you with common courtesy, much less as family. Find your new home. Let him grow up. It may take years, but it will happen. I am sorry your son hurts you like this, but you need to stop now. No more babysitting, no more in my house, no more anything.

He treats you horribly. Would you take this from anyone else? No? Then teach him an invaluable lesson. Better that you do it now, than someone else he ticks off who's going to do worse.

Answer 4

As a former high school veteran teacher, I can assure you he is on drugs, and needs interevcention and must get into a program away from all friends for 30 days. It appears this will not happen.

I am clear you blo9ve and care about your son. However, you do not care enough about yourslef. YOu MUST seek counseling and intervention, and I think a move to another community with adults you admire and like is long overdue.


Changing locks might help. However, it also might get his dander up and he moght get physical. I would first seek outside help, including from a dectectiuvbefrom your local area. Spill all your son's illegal and disturbing behaviors. Perhaps if he's picked up and charged with illegal entry, damaging property,. etc, something m,ight be done. I also think you should get them with their dogs to comer into your home to see if your son is stashing illegal drugs somewhere in your home unbeknownst to you.

If you file reports with the cops, they can do som,ething, for sure. You moight lose the guy for many years until your son decides to grow up and become responsible and mature. I also think he has p[ossiblke major depression or is bipolar in some way. Ask cops about that. They can direct you top ytheir psych units for further analysis of your son's behaviors.

I never spoke to my parents that way,. nor did the things he has done, and I am sorry for you. However, it is endangering you and you do not seem to understand the seriousness of this all.

Answer 5

Hey its like this your son needs a good kick in the a@@. I am 30 with 3. growing up If we got out of line or even now My mother or father will back hand us. Its all about respect. Don't be afraid to call the cops for his loud parties or your landlord. If you lock your door call the cops if he is there when you get home. Its time to put your foot down. He is an adult treat him like one. I hope this helps.

Answer 6

Slap his mother for raising such a disrespectful LITTLE BOY instead of a MAN!!

He gets by with it cause you let him !! Kick is *** out and tell him if/when he can at least ACT like a Man, only then is he allowed back into your house !!! If it takes moving, then move, but as with most kiddies unable to stand up and be adult, he’ll probably get kicked out of his place first,, problem solved!!

When you tell him "OUT NOW DON"T COME BACK" lock the door, if he breaks in again?? Call the cops and get him arrested !!

Answer 7

I am 26 and I can't imagine being that rude to my mom. I want to apologize to you on his behalf. I think that you should start by asking him why he is so mean to you. Tell him that he is your son and that you love him and want the best for him. Try not to be too pushy with him. Let him know that you are there for him. I have to commend you for not blowing up and losing your cool with him. Try to talk to him...If that doesn't work, you should probably consider putting a little distance in between the two of you. Good luck with your situation. I wish you the best.

Answer 8

your son has had 22 years to treat you this way and his rudeness is not going to go away....he needs to grow up and your moving is a good idea. then he will be on his own. what do you do when he acts this way? have you ever talked to him about this? is he on drugs?

do not put up with this behavior, because you are not helping him or you at all. move...tell him when he can be more respectful then he can come visit you. if you stay and he breaks in, call the police. you have rights, too...and he is not respecting them.

Answer 9

OH COME ONE !!! only YOU can make a change in your life !! You need to MOVE but not tell him. YES YOU CAN DO IT secretly!! Son or not you do not deserve to be treated the way.

If you complain here and do nothing about it then you do deserve exactly what you get. You teach people how to treat you! If they do not yield to you then you move on and leave them behind!

Time for you to get the hell out. and YES too bad that YOU have to be the one to move from your home but unless you make a change things will not be different! NO excuses!! You can do this! Start immediately!

Answer 10

your right he does need to grow up. but you also have to stop helping him. this is his kid make him watch her he has nothing else to do. tell him that the next time you come home and find him in your home that you will have him arrested.you can also inform him that because he has no hot water etc. that child protective can come in there and take that kid. stop babying him. he will not have respect for you because you are not demanding it from him. he knows that he can do what ever he wants and all your going to do is b!!ch about it.stop b!!tching and start acting.

Answer 11

Enough is enough. Do whatever you have to to get rid of this burden. What an ungrateful lout. If it were me, I would get a restraining order out to keep him away. Looks to me as though he never assumed responsibility and by him being so close to you he desn't need to grow up. You need to take drastic steps to save yourself. Do so very quickly.