Specifically, my husband's brother and his wife. Every time we see them all we get is snide remarks and masked jealousy (they have 3 kids they can't afford, she is an unemployed highschool dropout. We both have decent jobs, no kids, and college educations). We have tried reaching out to them many many times but nothing works. The seem to think that we are "rubbing our money in their faces" (it's not like we are rich!!) Now the holidays are coming and that side of the family is getting together, but I don't think I can take another year of being guilt-tripped for being responsible! I am afraid that either myself or my husband are going to be goaded into an arguement and possibly an explosion. What should we do???
2006-12-03 02:53:53 · 6 answers · asked by Blondonna 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
--- 2 years ago we bought all of their kids some really thoughtful educational toys and games (not expensive) and that is when we were accused of "rubbing our money in their faces", so last year we bought each of the children a simple book... that we mailed to them.
Now we are pretty much afraid to even get gifts for them, not knowing what kind of reaction to expect.
2006-12-03 03:18:23 · update #1
you are between a rock and a hard spot. they want you money, they just do not want to get off their butts and earn it, as for their snide remarks just answer honestly.It is not you that has any thing to hide nor be ashamed of, it is you that has done it right, envy and jealousy, are signs of insecurity and immaturity.do not take the bait when they come at you, simply say you are not rubbing any thing in their face, because you know that hard work and due diligence can accomplish any thing, let them try to answer that
2006-12-03 04:13:29 · answer #1 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tis the season to be jolly, don't let anyone take away your joy ,just maybe you and your husband are a little jealous of the couple who have kids and can't afford them, there may be a reason you are put together ,help them ,you will feel good down inside, they may be drop outs unemployed but maybe they could happier than you and your husband, Christmas is a time for giving ,could be your time or money,I am sure you can spare a little time (with a smile for the family and a little money ,go buy those kids a little extra ,if there mom and dad can't do it you and hubby can ,put a smile on those kids faces. God Bless and happy Holidays
2006-12-03 03:06:06 · answer #2 · answered by elizabeth_davis28 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Two wrongs don't make a right. Obviously your husband and you are more mature, adult and responsible than they are. I say don't get into any real conversations with them, if they speak to you, just smile and nod your head. You are the ones making the impressions on the children, as are they. One day the strong, intelligent ones will see the light. You can't avoid them forever, so just walk away when you can, otherwise, as I said, just smile and nod your head at whatever they say.
Take care, best of luck and try to enjoy yourselves no matter what!
2006-12-03 02:59:20 · answer #3 · answered by oracle1 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What ever they say let it go in one ear and out the other. be polite,
If it is not at your home find a reason to leave early. Or stand up to them and tell them that you are sick of hearing about their belly aching. And change topics or just get up and walk out . Or simply tell them you have made other plans, And that you are sorry you can not do the Holiday this year. And leave it at that
2006-12-03 03:04:40 · answer #4 · answered by sassy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain & I wish had the right answer. I have been dealing with my in laws for 16 years & I've learned that killing some of them with kindness puts a fear in them more than anything. I wish you luck as well as myself cause I'm tired too.
2006-12-03 03:08:22 · answer #5 · answered by "karma" 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean, Im gonna be in the same sit' ....
2006-12-03 02:56:33 · answer #6 · answered by ohio_gurl042 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋