We were to get married in 4 months, he has been lying to me about where he is. He works out of country and told me he was taking his R&R in Germany, then in March, he was coming home and we were getting married. I found out he has been lying, he is partying up with 2 other woman in Australia. This guy is a big, balding, hairy- backed man. He has a 3'' penis and seemed inexperienced in bed. He would squash me in bed to where I could hardly breath. I looked passed this and loved him with all my heart, faithfully. I gave up a good sex life to be with someone I loved and he treats me like this. I have been crying for 4 days now. I texted him and for 4 days now, he only texted once saying I am in England. Which I found out positively he was lying. How can someone be so cold-hearted. I am a beautiful girl and now have people asking what I saw in the ugly man. I never thought of him as unattractive. Everyone is say he was a dog. But why is he happy and I am so sad?
2006-12-02 22:29:31 · 17 answers · asked by 2cool4fools 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Love looks beyond good looks and wealth, they say. I am sure its true, but seeing your description of this guy, I too have the same question, what did you really see in him ? Forget the ugly part, you definitely knew he could never satisfy you, or probably not physically compatible, but you have covered it up saying ''i gave up a good sex to be with someone i love'', while I appreciate your sincerity, deep inside, you really didnt like what you were doing. Perhaps you were worried about the '''we-told-you-so'' statements that you may get from your family / freinds. Get away, and consider yourself blessed. You are a beautiful woman, and you deserve the best for being sincere and committed, right ? Yes, you deserve the best. Get over it, and its not going to be easy. At this time be with your closest of freinds, or family, take time to get over this entire issue. When he comes back, with his huge bundle of lies once more, show him the door. Your question sounds like he has taken you for granted. Have you confronted him about his lies ? If not, you should. You may feel good if he tries to convince you, but the way you have described him, I doubt, if he would be faithful, or committed to you in the future. Consider that you have been saved thinking of what would happen if you were actually marrying this guy. Would you be sure that he wouldnt carry on playing behind your back ? I doubt that too.
And why is he happy and you are sad ? thats a tough question, cos' we do not know what he is feeling or saying or doing. But for your sake we know that he is playing around, and that you should just get over it. It hurts, I know, that you stood up for him, and you did give up certain essentials in life for this guy.
I am sure you'll get over this. And your life does not stop here, does it ? Theres much more to do and live for.....
2006-12-02 22:42:04 · answer #1 · answered by arya 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's the worst feeling. It's not the cheating exactly, I mean it is, but it's more that he chose to do something deceitful while you trusted he wouldn't. You may think I'm crazy, but as bad as you feel right now, I think everyone should experience that once just so you know how badly you can hurt someone that loves you. One day your true love will come around, not that joke of a man. So, dry up your eyes, it's happened and it's over. Time to turn the page. You'll know better next time.
Oh, and those guys offering there email addresses are trying to get to you while you're on the rebound, probably because they're desperate. It's pretty shameful when you think about it.
2006-12-03 07:02:54 · answer #2 · answered by eric J 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
2cool4fools - if your avatar is a reflection of your looks, the poor stupid fool doesn't know what he has lost.
He feels that the only way he can get off is to screw around with other women. He probably thinks he's "god's gift". When he was created, god broke the mould so he wouldn't make the same mistake twice.
Let's face it; you are so attractive that you could gain the attentions of someone far better. Your revenge would be him seeing you with another guy who would be far better looking and possessed of more brains.
Chalk him up as a bad experience and look for your ideal in someone else. As I said before, if your looks match your avatar, then you should not be single for much longer.
Kindest regards.
Anthony.
Don't get mad - get even.
2006-12-03 06:40:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anthony 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now is not the time to feel sad. Get out quickly! Some people will make use of their body 'defects' to gain pity. You were too trusting. There are others who know their 'place' when it comes to whether they are the kind of men and women society deems acceptable and they are not devious when they chance upon another who would truly love them for who they are, not what they look like.
This man is obviously trying to deceive you and gain your sympathy. You need discernment. Quickly get out and don't let him grovel to you (he might do that knowing your soft spot); a tiger doesn't soon change his spots! Cut all ties with him! Even if he cries and ask for forgiveness. Beware of those who come to you as wolves dressed in sheepskin!
2006-12-03 07:05:36 · answer #4 · answered by thru a glass darkly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were a nice girl who was not shallow as some others are and you got used by a jerk. There are nice guys out there just find one. Not all men are liars just like not all women are cheating types. You defiantly deserved better and just don't be hard on yourself. I was used by a Filipino girl who was new to this country. I did everything for her and treated her like a princess and she dumped me for a college boy. I felt bad that I had let myself be used. Just be careful now, because there are low-lives just like him out there that will try to be your bf just because you are hurting and needing a friend at the moment, be sure the next guy you get really deserves you and isn't just trying to use you. Good luck!!
2006-12-03 06:34:55 · answer #5 · answered by Jim V 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Whatever you see in him has nothing to do with anyone else. It sounds like some self esteem issues on both parts. Some men cheat to see if the still got "it"...and in most cases has nothing to do with you. If you love someone you can't help the pain when being hurt but I think if you listen to yourself, you probably will find out that that person may not be right for you. Love doesn't hurt, and if he doesn't care about hurting you he doesn't really love you."
2006-12-03 06:44:28 · answer #6 · answered by Mocha 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From what I could understand from your description, you are unhappy because you were used. You had feelings for him and were betrayed. Those feelings are naturally a part of the healing process.
He is and will remain happy because he had no feelings at all. He was the user. Users feel no remorse so they won't ever feel badly about what they do to others.
Try not to be bitter about it. Start looking around for someone who will appreciate you.
2006-12-03 06:34:26 · answer #7 · answered by Lorrie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first of all you are definitly not stupid. Everybody gets used at some point in their life you just have to get over it and move on. Personally i think you ex is a jerk and any soldier would be lucky to have someone like you to come home to.
2006-12-03 06:39:22 · answer #8 · answered by alex 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a answer and you might think this is crazy but just send me an email, normally i wouldn't do this but i have experienced the smae thing. i am nice looking and single, maybe we can talk.
buzzbeepro@yahoo.com.. just stop crying you need to regain yourself again.
2006-12-03 06:35:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like a good guy. you better marry him
2006-12-03 06:33:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋