i have a friend her son has started college and has really good grades .but the son meet new friends .he is starting to stay out late and has started drinking and partying with these's friends. she has talked to him and so has his father nothing they say is helping with the problem .she is concerned that her sons grade will be affected and concerned for her sons health and future, do any of you have any advice on what she can do to help her son .she wants him to stop drinking . i have said to stop all his money but she is worried if she does this he will drop out of college, she does not want him to drop out of college . he is of age so naturally she can not tell him what to do . but she is worried sick about her son . please any advice to help her. and please be kind in your replys.
2006-12-02 18:02:27 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
The only "problem" I see in your entire question is that the mother doesn't like what the sone is doing. That makes it HER problem. A lot of college kids drink and yes, of course it becomes a problem for some students but that is the exception. You say the mother is worried that grades will drop. Well have they? It's a little early to start demonizing the behavior. Not to be a jerk but it sounds like the mother is a little prudish and needs to realize that just because she sees something as bad doesn't mean it inherently is.
And from personal experience, I didn't drink through highschool or early college. In fact I nearly flunked out my 1st year with no help from alcohol what so ever. Now I drink a little less than moderately, partake in other substances and I'm doing fine, hoping to start a PhD soon.
2006-12-02 22:39:05 · answer #1 · answered by hot carl sagan: ninja for hire 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have her print out some information on Alcohol and Drugs.
Somehow these things have to be talked about and the best
way is not confrontational but informative and educational.
he should know what he can get himself into, if associating
with a crowd that has irresponsible habits.
Drinking and driving can kill. And drinking comes drugs(sometimes) depending on the crowd. And with that comes
free sex- distorted thinking will lead to unprotected fun, and
STDs some of which can not be cured.
There are a lot of tragic things that can happen nowadays,
even though the college years are experimental years.
With that said, she needs to learn some of these things
that will prepare her for the "talk" beforehand. And handling
it wont be easy. A good male friend with maturity is a good idea for doing the deed.
Goodluck. Its a good thing she's discovered this early on.
T
2006-12-02 18:29:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In this situation, tough love is the best love.
I'd take part of your advice and cut off any extra funds so that he won't have the money to drink unless someone else pays for it.
PLEASE...do something now before it's too late.
If he drops out of school, then he just drops out. He can always go back to school later. But if something bad happens to him because of his drinking and partying, more than like ly he won't be able to go back and fix that.
2006-12-02 22:06:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, there is nothing big that she can do, besides beg him to stop or just hope that he will soon realize the mistakes he is making before it is too late. Did she try talking--really talking, not doing the dishes and talking--to her son? Her talk should be informative, not acusitive. He might not know what he's getting himself into.
Maybe she needs to pay him and his friends a visit.
He's of age, and her control of him might be on the wane right now.
2006-12-02 18:30:51 · answer #4 · answered by navdeepkaur 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋