i have a boyfriend of 5 months...very much in love :-)...recently i've been thinking of having sex with him because it feels very right. i would like you GIRLS to answer this Q...how bad does it hurt the first time?? honest answers please. i mean how could it hurt so much for someone and not hurt at all for others!
THANKS!!
2006-12-02 17:47:12 · 16 answers · asked by MG 1 in Beauty & Style ➔ Skin & Body ➔ Other - Skin & Body
It depends on these things:
-If you're lubricated vs. dry (Plenty of foreplay will arouse you and naturally your vagina will secret natural, clear liquid to help his penis glide in)
-If you're relaxed vs. tense (If you are relaxed and not nervous ALL of the muscles in your body including your vagina)
-The size of his penis (Width and length)
My first experience was excruciating. We were a couple of inexperienced virgins. I never used a tampon nor experimented with placing objects in my vagina, I was nervous and poorly lubricated. I bled quite a bit when my hymen tore, but every girl is different. Some girls are born without one, others break them in accidents, some have thick hymens; others have thin ones. Take your time, relax, don't allow him to penetrate you until you're adequately lubricated. Light some candles in a dark room, play some romantic music, wear something sexy. Make it special!
2006-12-02 18:20:22 · answer #1 · answered by Suz E. Home BAKER 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Well, seeing I'm a girl, I think I can answer you. You're right-its hurts for some and not for others. This is what it depends on: how nervous you are (fear will create tension throughout your body), how much there has been (for lack of a better term) playtime 'down there' (obviously other than sex). Also, how gentle the guy is...the more gentle and careful he is, the likelyhood of it being excruitiating lessens. Take some deep breaths, make sure it's what you want to do, tell him to be gentle and you should be just fine.
2006-12-03 01:55:45 · answer #2 · answered by jiggarox7997 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would recommend to you that you wait until you are married to have sex because it will be a MUCH better physical experience. Sex for a woman is very audible (men are visual) experience and you need to be completely in the mood and with a partner who is invested in you in order to have a pleasurable time.
Think about it, if the girl is going: I wonder if he'll tell, I wonder if my parents will walk in, I wonder what my friends will say, I wonder if the condom breaks, I wonder if I'll get pregnant, I wonder if he'll still respect me, and so on, you are NOT likely to have an organism.
Rather the best first time would be on your wedding night, when you have nothing to worry about and the two of you can enjoy your bodies as was intended.
Now, as to the physical aspect, it varies for each woman and is dependent on the man she is with. If enough foreplay is involved and you are both relaxed, it can feel like nothing more than a slight pressure.
However, if you are both nervous and anxious, there's not foreplay to stimulate you, then it can be more painful. Also, if the man is extremely large (and I mean unusually, rarely large) than the entire experience can be quite painful.
2006-12-03 01:55:18 · answer #3 · answered by Last Ent Wife (RCIA) 7 · 9⤊ 0⤋
Objectively, the pain of first time sex is the hymen breaking. That can happen by accident, while doing sports, or some girls have no hymen at all. The actual pain of penetration is like a sting, and that's about it. So no, I wouldn't say it hurts, unless you are really intolerant of pain.
Unfortunately, the pain of your boyfriend being too rough is quite another story...
2006-12-03 09:31:04 · answer #4 · answered by Mary Contrary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It hurts like hell on the first time, but not so much if you're wet and ready for him. Do what you want, if you wanna have sex with him then go for it. Only you can live the life we're not. Just have safe sex so you won't regret anything later on.
2006-12-03 09:21:59 · answer #5 · answered by Callie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The vagina is a muscle so it doesn't matter how "tight" you are. As long as you are relaxed and there has been PLENTY of foreplay and you are very turned on, you should be wet enough, and it shouldn't be very painful. Have him finger you beforehand and use plenty of lube so that you will be relaxed and ready. Take your time and don't rush. My first time didn't hurt at all. Good luck.
2006-12-03 05:10:11 · answer #6 · answered by dresdendarling 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie, i know you say you love him and i dont doubt that you do and i dont want to sound like a mother but you are asking for opinions so i am going to give you mine.
i was with my 1st boyfriend for a total of 9 months and around our 8th month i lost my virginity to him. and the whole month after we had sex, was hell he wasnt talking to me as much and all that. i cant say you bf is like that cuz i havent met him but i just want you to think about every possible thing that could go wrong, such as if you get pregnant, will he be there? will he help you? have you talked about diseases? you have to talk about it before you do it. i know you might feel it is right but you have to think of yourself in terms of sex. its so personal. are you willing to take the chance of him breaking your heart? are you willing to get pregnant and be a mother? sex will either make you stronger or it will ruin your relationship.
when i had sex with my ex, he was more into himself, he asked if i was ok and everything but he started going faster and i hit my head on the wall and he didnt stop he just kept going til he finish. not a great story to tell. it did hurt and part of the reason is he was about 7 inches long and pretty thick so it burned going in. and it was pulling my skin down there so it hurt but mostly just pressure.
just please think about it. i mean EVERYTHING. and talk to him. communication is sooooo important when deciding to have sex no matter you age or if it is your 1st time or you 50th.
i wish you the best.
2006-12-03 01:58:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I tend to think i t really depends on the girl, if you really love this person at the moment it happens you won't think about the pain but more the pleasure your about to endure. Sum it up girlfriend, it's not that bad. It may hurt a short time, but the pleasure makes it rewarding. Have fun.
2006-12-03 02:06:29 · answer #8 · answered by debbie w 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How old are you????????????!!!!!!!!!!!
You have ONLY been with him FIVE months. Thats NOT a long time at all. SAVE your virginity. If someone loves you they will WAIT.
This is a talk you should be having with your mother. If you cant talk to an adult about this face to face you are not mature enough or emotionaly ready to have sex.
Sex is a serious thing. Its not just about being in love. Sex has the power to give life, and it has the power to TAKE life.
You should be on birth control if you are considering sex and even if you are on the pill your boyfriend should ALWAYS wear a condom. NO EXCEPTIONS. If you are too embarassed to get on the pill, buy condoms or insist your boyfriend wear a condom, you are not ready for sex.
If you have no one you can trust call Planned Parenthood at 1-800-230-PLAN and they can answer your questions.
Your first love is rarely your last. Please wait.
2006-12-03 01:55:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 3⤋
If you are not married, it's the most painfull thing that can ever happen to a young woman.....It's best to wait untill you are married to a wonderful man who can take his time with you and make it comfortable for you. Then you can have the most enjoyable, wonderful sex you will ever have.
2006-12-03 03:08:39 · answer #10 · answered by dc105lvnv 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋